To think that you can’t legally ground an over 16?

[christmas18]

Once a dc is 16 you can’t can you?
Actually enforce a grounding ??
Surely it’s imprisonment if some sort even if they behaving atrociously and recklessly you can’t actually ground them and carry that out ?

I think technically deprivation of liberty is illegal at any age.

Why not?

Has your mum grounded you?

'Deprivation of Liberty' when it's keeping your own child at home against their will is not illegal

No but you can take the wifi

no, of course, if they misbehave, it's much better to let them be unsafe, wreck their lives and be stupid.

If you think that grounding is too harsh, you might prefer to kick them out, not give them a penny for food and board and leave them destroy their lives all by themselves. Or you can parent, and impose for them to follow your rules or put up with the consequences when they cross the line.

A simple choice

unless you are a nutcase you think grounding means locking in a cage, in which case the police can rightly be involved pronto

No I have a 17 year old
Who has threatened to call the police if I ground her as it’s illegal apparently once over 16?
I can’t find out if this is true.
I don’t want it to get to that stage obviously but the circumstances are extremely complicated and she possible needs protecting from herself (I cannot go into detail other than it is not straightforward and she is vulnerable)

To enforce a grounding would mean to physically stop her leaving the house and this is a situation I want to avoid as well as her threat to call police
I would much rather get her to see sense and not do things when out that are risk taking but I can’t get that message across atm and am struggling to see what other options to keep her safe are

You told her she is grounded, you did not do anything physical. She can call the police as much as she wants, and make herself look ridiculous and get a bollocking for wasting their time.

But what do you mean by 'ground her'? There's a difference between telling her in no uncertain terms that she's not allowed out and if she does go out then she loses all privileges/wifi/pocket money etc, and actually locking the door.

Let her call the police and see what they say! She'll be laughed at.

Under 16 you cannot physically restrain or lock them in. So I would assume the same applies to over 16's. So once they work that bit out they can walk out of the front door.
So the same would apply to 16/17-year-olds.

We tried stopping pocket money so that going out was limited
She borrows off people (which tbh won’t last long as she can’t repay)

@Notanotman

Check out the law around this. It is, but there can be justifications based on safety and developmental ability to make wise choices. In the same way that smacking is assault, which is illegal, but some people would use the defence of "reasonable chastisement". There's a difference between illegal as in breaching written law, and illegal as in something the police would be interested in. In this case, it's the former, not the latter.

I just want her to be safe and she’s not acting responsibly

If you tell her she's grounded and she tries to leave, what will you do? If you physically prevent her you could potentially be committing an offence. It might be better if you threaten to call the police if she leaves - presumably you have grounds for your concerns about her safety?

I'm 99.99999% certain the police will not attend if she phones them and tells them she's 17 and her mother has told her she's grounded.

Under 16 you cannot physically restrain or lock them in.

huh?!? You are more likely to be prosecuted for allowing a 3 or 10 year to roam free on the road than to lock the door to ensure they are safe!

I wouldn’t physically restrain her as I think that would cause a huge meltdown 😔 I’m just worried as her judgement is off so she will put herself at risk
I have tried to explain but she either doesn’t want to hear or doesn’t understand

If there are safeguarding goncerns, then police, social services, youth service, depending on where your concerns are.

Are you grounding her as a punishment or to protect her safety, if she is at risk of harm or abuse if she goes out.

I understand. I had this with my eldest and he wasn't 16. He's extremely vulnerable. After he stormed out I reported him missing and I mentioned to the officers attending I had tried to stop him going out.
Oh, how?
And I explained that I had tried to safely physically hold him (as I sometimes had to do at other times) and that I had locked the door. They were understanding about it, but I was told I have to just let him go every time, report him missing as vulnerable and I was given a contact person in the police to keep updated with recent pictures.

Do you expect her to pay her way and contribute like an adult?

If so then you cant ground her like a child.

Just one of many sites that state

A parent cannot stop a child leaving home by locking them in or physically restraining them. But parents have a legal responsibility for their children until their child reaches 16, so they can take action in court to bring their child back if he or she runs away.
Is it legal? A parents' guide to the law
www.rbkc.gov.uk/pdf/FPI%20is%20it%20legal%20Feb_08.pdf

A combination I suppose
She has broken agreements about places she goes and times, travelled to and from places alone at night etc and it’s also a case of keeping her safe too. It’s very complicated I just feel that she’s gone off the rails very quickly and due to the set of circumstances her judgement of situations and people’s intentions are not as they should be
She refuses to ever have friends round so the people she is ‘socialising’ with are totally unknown to us and that worries me greatly

She is totally dependant on us doesn’t have any income of her own as still in full time education