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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect my colleague to take a message when I'm on a personal call

70 replies

Catchuptv · 03/12/2018 08:38

So I'm going through a lot at the moment and I have to admit have taken a few personal calls at work recently.

Am I being unreasonable to expect my collegues not to put calls through to me when I'm on my mobile? I got a right dirty look off one the other day and he decided to transfer it to me anyway.

OP posts:
NotANotMan · 03/12/2018 08:58

Does your supervisor know the circumstances?

Alfie190 · 03/12/2018 08:59

So you can sit at your desk discussing whatever for all your colleagues to hear, but yout cannot post it on the internet when all we know is your username.

You need to start behaving more professionally at work, you are pissing off your colleagues.

dinosaurglitterrepublic · 03/12/2018 09:00

Even with the most solid of excuses for taking personal calls at work, if it’s becoming a frequent thing, I would exercise some discretion and take the call away from my desk in the circumstances you have described.

Yinv · 03/12/2018 09:01

If the colleagues aren’t aware of what you are going through, they can’t help you or make allowances. Perhaps it looks to them as though you are just taking the piss. I appreciate you aren’t but they probably think you are

sossages · 03/12/2018 09:01

Well I think unless you're normally difficult about taking calls and your colleague has reached his last straw, I think he is being a bit of a shit. When I worked in an office I'd have assumed a colleague taking a personal call was dealing with something that couldn't wait, and would have taken a message rather than needlessly be an arsehole.

SuperSuperSuper · 03/12/2018 09:02

I'd agree that it depends on the nature of the calls (relationship dramas can wait until after work, calls from school or hospital cannot) and whether your manager is aware/condones it.

StealthPolarBear · 03/12/2018 09:03

Op good for you for taking comments on board. I hope the problems get resolved soon.

C8H10N4O2 · 03/12/2018 09:04

Shouldn't be taking personal calls at work end of! Work and home life should always be separate. Sorry, but that's the way it is

Rubbish, every working environment is different and that is what will dictate the practicalities of taking personal calls.

Some jobs make it impossible or inappropriate outside of structured breaks/gaps. Other jobs have no structured breaks and people manage their own time.

TheGirlWithAllTheFeathers · 03/12/2018 09:04

It must be wonderful for your your colleagues to be hearing about your personal issues.Everyone has to take a personal call at some point, especially if you have kids or ill relatives. But you absolutely should walk away from the desk and into the hall or something.

Puggles123 · 03/12/2018 09:05

You should try and make/take personal calls away from your desk (as long as your manager knows)- this means they won’t be able to transfer calls, and in honesty, it can be disruptive to other people.

Believeitornot · 03/12/2018 09:06

Maybe they’re fed up of effectively covering for you while you should be working

If I take a personal call at work I move away and find somewhere else. It’s not fair for everyone to have to listen to your issues anyway!

Coronapop · 03/12/2018 09:11

YABVU. Many people work in jobs where they cannot take personal calls - and they manage.

StealthPolarBear · 03/12/2018 09:11

Have people seen the update

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 03/12/2018 09:16

OP does your manager and your colleague know that you're going through something in your personal life?

Believeitornot · 03/12/2018 09:16

Have people seen the update

Yes, but I responded anyway as she said OP thought it was mean. And I was replying to that bit.

Original poster
Catchuptv · 03/12/2018 09:17

Thanks once again everyone - sorry I can see that I'm being unreasonable and I will take all your comments on board. When I think about it it's probably very annoying when everyone is busy and tbh I really hadn't thought that. I'm being selfish and I need to take a long hard look at myself. All your remarks are appreciated.

OP posts:
Believeitornot · 03/12/2018 09:21

Maybe OP you could speak to your manager and explain

You can also ask people only to ring on your lunch break if possible?

AutumnCrow · 03/12/2018 09:22

Good luck with whatever your personal problems are, OP.

I agree the best way forward is to be more aware and discreet - and communicate with your colleagues. I'm glad you've taken advice on board.

SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst · 03/12/2018 09:25

Are you at work now, OP?

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 03/12/2018 09:27

Take care OP. Hope things start to get better for you. Maybe a chat with your colleague might help just so she knows you're not just chatting to your friend?

dogzdinner · 03/12/2018 09:29

If you are having to take so many urgent personal calls maybe you should have time off work to attend to whatever is going on?

londonrach · 03/12/2018 09:34

Yabu. If its personal you leave your desk. I work nhs personal calls are banned. If needed too in sos situation we slip away somewhere private.

PenelopeFlintstone · 03/12/2018 09:44

We take personal calls at our desks and it would be frowned upon if we left our desks to talk on the phone. We just keep the calls reasonably short and everyone does it, including our managers.

ClaudiaWankleman · 03/12/2018 09:51

YABVU. Many people work in jobs where they cannot take personal calls - and they manage

That doesn't mean OP has to be a martyr and not take her calls though. Many people work in jobs where they can take personal calls.

TidyDancer · 03/12/2018 09:58

This really does depend on what the personal circumstances are. If there's been bereavement (for eg) then I think I would be more willing to cover for a colleague taking personal calls.

Then again, if it's something like 10 calls a day for the last few weeks, I think that would try anyone's patience no matter the circumstances.