to realise dh doesn't really care

[Isthisalltherewillbe]

Recently I've been feeling my husband doesn't care or like me
I've noticed over the past 3 years that my DH doesn't do the things I'd want a partner to do and it's not completely his fault it's mine too.
Things like; we just got a conservatory built and he did it exactly how his mum wanted him to do it even though I didn't agree and wanted a different layout. His mum's very pushy and he tends to just do as he's told. He now realises I was right about the layout but says I didn't push for it and he's right I didn't because I'm exhausted,I hate arguing with him especially over his mum, I like her although she likes to control everything so this time I didn't speak up.
Also things like, my Brother in law picks him wife up from the train station everyday so she doesn't have to walk 5 mins down the road, whereas I walk 25 mins to my home from the train station and never once has my DH offered to pick me up. I'm quite independent so I don't mind walking but the thought would be nice?
He also complains about money so I scrimp and save but he will spend money on lunch out everyday instead of taking food from home or he will buy himself tools and then complain when I say we need a new bathmat for example!
I save movies that I think he will like to watch and he will sit there on his phone the whole time or with his arms crossed, if I try and cuddle up to him I get my bum or boobs fondled instead of just a cuddle so I just sit in my corner and leave him in his.
He used to be so nice and caring and since we got married he doesn't seem to care.
Am I just being a big baby and needy or do I deserve someone who makes me feel loved?

Does he ha e any good qualities that you like? Or does the bad completely outweigh the good?

An example of my dh is he leaves the house first, he scrapes the ice off his car but not mine, fine. But he will actually take my ice scraper and leave me with nothing.

He does have good points. He's a moral person, he'd never cheat, he is an amazing father to the DC, he never shouts, he doesn't hold grudges.. I'm sure there's other things I'm not thinking of right now.
He's a bit meh though, no other way to put it, he never thinks of things to do with the dc or me, it's always my idea where to go what to do. He's never passionate about anything.
He will only buy me flowers or chocolates if we've had a huge argument and it's always the same stuff. He's never bought me a well thought out present in his life.
I just want to feel loved , I don't hate him, I don't resent him, I just don't feel anything from him.

An 'amazing father' doesn't treat their mother with such extreme lack of respect or consideration. I'm assuming he is their Dad, I don't think you have actually explicitly said that.

Sometimes, it isn't necessarily that there is one partner completely at fault, but more that you just don't match up and make a good couple together. Perhaps you once did, but sometimes people develop in different directions.

Trouble is, the resentment creeps in and it is very corrosive. It will replace the current state of indifference. You both deserve better out of life. Best to consider if it is a retrievable situation or whether to move on with your lives apart before it does become a bad situation for the whole family.