Am I lazy and should I just get on with it?

[isittooearlyforgin]

Genuinely interested in opinion as I really can't gauge this. I took a job I was genuinely excited about and put a lot of effort into getting. Have gone from part time to full time with a lot more responsibility. My children are not little anymore. I am leaving the house at 7 and coming home at 7 plus working from home weekends. I'm exhausted, finding cooking cleaning etc plus spending quality time with kids quite hard. Other people do this...Am I being lazy, will it get easier, how do other people do this? Is it a lack of organisation? Tips, advice etc welcome.

You have to delegate either to your DP, your DCs or to paid help eg a cleaner. Online shopping frees up time. You also need to prioritise.If you're exhausted then you're either doing too much or are not at your optimum health.
A change in routine can be initially draining but if it's sucking all the joy and energy out of your life, then tbh I'd reconsider if the job is for you.

Looking again at the fact you're out of the house for 12 hours and working weekends, I'm wondering how many hours you're working and how many you're contracted to work? If it's flexi-time then make sure you claim your hours back. Don't create an expectation that you'll work a 70 hr week if you're actually only contracted for 40 because it isn't sustainable.

You're not lazy. It's bloody hard.

I don't know anyone who does that. Sounds exhausting.
Anyone I know who works that hard, also has a cleaner etc
How old are your dc?

Thanks spanglylycra. Think part of the problem is being part time you take up the flak naturally so the whole dynamic of the family needs to change which isn't east to do after 10 years of being the main care giver

Children are 11 and 14 so old enough to help, we just need to reassign chores I think. Husband also does long days in London.

How much of that 12 hour day is commute and how much is in work? With weekends on top of that it's totally bonkers. There is no work life balance cos it sounds like there is only work. Dream job or not, you have to switch off at some point!

Nope not lazy. That's seriously hard work!!

My dh does this, the thing is it works because I either don't work or work part time. As dc get older I want to work full time. I suspect chaos will break out.
Create a rota for everyone.
Hire cleaners, gardeners etc.
Your previous life only worked because you did wife work. Think about what your dh does outside of work. Aim to do the same. Fill the gaps with paid people and or explain others have to do more.

It takes time to adjust

DH and I both work long hours. Here's what we do:

Shopping delivered.
Cleaner.
Gardener.
Batch cooking on a Sunday afternoon.
Instant Pot.
Takeaway night.
Sheer bloody mindedness.
Gin!

Split everything chores wise. Including the kids.

Wow!! Sounds like a tough call to me.. Time management is definitely the key in your situation from the info provided.. Sit together as a family for an hour and come up with a daily timetable and the main focus point should be family time at least weekly- not whilst your working from home actually spend time together, sit, eat talk play etc.. Life is too short, make the most of it

Also get blood tests done. You might have undiagnosed health issues like underactive thyroid. I was tired all.The time & could no longer do what I used to do. Once diagnosed and treated i am now better functioning and have cleaning/ gardening help at home.

Thanks all for your replies. Must think my options through. I think fundamentally I'm quite like the easy life and I've bitten off more than I want to chew. The nice thing about s comfort zone is it's nice and comforting!!!

Yes, if you and husband are now both full time, he needs to share chores with you, plus some allocated to the kids. Maybe some that you pay people to do. But everyone in the family has to pick up some of the slack.

I hit a similar wall to you, sat DH down and said ‘I can’t cope, we need to review what everyone does and what we can outsource.’ We are very fortunate in that we can afford to outsource cleaning and gardening, so that gets done by someone else. He has stepped up in lots of areas, and I am a much less tired, happier, less stressed person as a result. Have the chat.