To ask if you would save to buy a house after losing everything

[greenskies]

NC for this one as embarrassed by our situation. Myself and DH have been through a rough twelve months.

Our business went into liquidation as sales were low and we had no option. However, without going into too much detail we lost our home trying to pull the business round.
We are now in rented accommodation and both have secured jobs. I feel like a complete failure as it was partly our fault for making bad business decisions yet other factors came into it too.

However we can only look forward. Just about all the debt has gone and we are in a position to start saving again. So lucky to both get good jobs.
I want to buy a house again but my husband thinks we should forget it and just enjoy life and save for the future! Such as invest more into our pensions.
We are both mid forties but I feel so embarrassed about our situation. Amazing how many people stop making contact when you fall!
We have 3 children and one SD.
AIBU to ask if you feel it is
Important to buy a home. Prices are ridiculously high on our area.

Don’t feel embarrassed! At all! There’s no shame in renting a house, you’ve both got good jobs and seem to have come out of the other side of a terrible situation remarkably well. Only you can decide if owning a property is important- but there’s a lot to be said for renting (no repair or maintainance costs, freedom, etc). That being said, it’s never too late to save to buy property again if that’s what you want. Hugs to you, you’ve had a really shitty time of things. Don’t be hard on yourself.
Also your friends who have dropped you don’t sound like very nice people. No great loss.

We're in a similar position, both got nice jobs now and rent a beautiful place that we love. I would love to have buy again, but my DH, like yours, isn't too worried. I have also felt embarrassed but you do learn who your friends are.
I also know, in reality, that actually, we have made a good life for ourselves and the DC's and should be actually quite proud of the progress we have made. But the inner monologue is very noisy!!

Good luck in whatever you choose to do.

Good for you getting back on your feet. I've known a few others who've been in your position and it's not much fun but they recovered and bought another house. So can you. A real new start.

Good luck.

No one who TRULY loves and cares about you gives two shits if you own a home. Take a deep breath and let go of this unfounded embarrassment. Do whatever is best for your financial future.

Hoard your money and buy outright when you retire.

I like the sense of stability and more importantly privacy that comes from owning my home. Because of that, I would buy again in your situation.

You will always need somewhere to stay, so you will always be in the position of paying rent or a mortgage.

It's a tricky decision these days.

In the past you could feel fairly secure that you would get back what you paid for the house (and more) and that renting was 'dead money'. You'd have finished paying for it by the time you retired. It was a fairly easy decision, as long as you could secure a mortgage.

Currently, prices are so high compared to wages that you feel it must be a bubble and the market should correct itself, which would leave anyone who bought at the top of the market in negative equity. However - I've thought this for at least 15 years now, so what do I know? Nowt. I don't know how anyone can afford to get on the property ladder these days.

As for the rental market - council housing is all but extinct and many private landlords are amateurs who think their property is nothing but a cash cow and why should they spend their money on maintaining the fabric of the building? If they decide they're tired of being a landlord they can sell the property from under you and give you notice to leave, no matter how good a tenant you have been. There's very little security in renting, I've read too many despairing threads on MN in the last year or so where families are constantly have to up sticks and move again due to the vagaries of the rental market.

"I want to buy a house again but my husband thinks we should forget it and just enjoy life and save for the future! Such as invest more into our pensions."
I have some sympathy for your husband's take on it, you say you've had a rough year and maybe he wants to draw breath before (if?) shouldering a "ridiculously high" mortgage.

But I'm cautious, and I'd be worried about how I'd meet the rent once I retired, regardless of how much I'd invested in pensions. I think you need to properly explore your options, work the figures and consider what the future might bring. Nothing more constant than change, and you need to consider what changes might happen in the housing market, and how you'd be able to adapt to those changes.

And you shouldn't feel embarrassed, you've dusted yourself off and got back on your feet. That's pretty damned positive in my book!

My only concern would be how would you afford rent once retired? It would take a massive chunk out of your monthly pension. The whole point of a mortgage is that's it's paid off by retirement, so that large household payment is gone.
Ask him how he thinks you'll pay rent at 67 plus?

I didn’t exactly loose everything but I did have to start from scratch in April this year and I’ve saved up a 10% deposit and bought a tiny house in a shitty area that will do us for the next 2/3 years. After which my plan is to rent it out and rent a nice house with better schools for DS when he gets to secondary school. That way I’m on the ladder, it’ll be paid off entirely by the time I retire and it’ll be fine for just me when I’m old I intend to be on cruises 90% of the time by then anyway.

Thanks for all your replies.
I have thought about hoarding money and then buying when we no longer need a family home.
I have to remember we are one of the lucky ones and have options.

Not really a massive problem in today's world but it is an uncertain world and stability is important. Was watching my son in the playground this morning and he is oblivious. Made me realise that as long as they are safe and well looked after them that's all that matters.