Losing my shit over climate change

[fuckingterrified]

Wasn't sure if I should post in climate change or mental health, so I've plumped for here although I really fear I'm not BU. Would appreciate some objective opinions so gave name changes also.

Since the UN report came out about 12 years to limit climate change damage, Ive been getting more and more freaked out and despondent about the state of the planet and the predicted environmental disaster. To the point where I can't sleep and I'm just terrified for what the future will be for my children. I'm trying to do all I can personally but it feels like a drop in a plastic filled ocean. I feel like everyone should be talking about this and it should be headline news, I almost can't believe that most of the people I know are ignoring this and/or feel I am unhinged.

BUT, I do recognise I'm a highly anxious person. About this time last year I was preparing for a nuclear war due to the US/North Korea situation. After this I stopped reading the news and took myself off Facebook as I could not cope with what I seeing. Obviously the news does creep in and I've been reading more in the last few weeks.

It's not just climate change I'm also freaking out about brexit and just feel selfish for bringing children into this mess of a world. I go to work and manage to do my job, and I can look after my family so it's not impacting on anyone else just tearing me apart. I do voice my fears to my friends and I make a joke out of my anxiety to them. So am I a lunatic who should just stop reading the news and get some anti anxiety medication? Or am I right and my children have no future and the world is burning?

Every age of the world has faced its problems and potential disasters. There is much to be thankful for about living now rather than in past centuries. Serious poverty has massively decreased, medical science is able to cure or wipe out diseases that used to kill people, discrimination against women, racial groups and those of different sexuality is increasingly illegal etc etc. It is worth remembering that happy statistics are not regarded as newsworthy.

Climate change and other environmental problems are very worrying, but there seems to be more urgency about doing something about it atm.

Imo it is not normal for global, non-immediately-urgent problems to affect an indiviual to the point of losing sleep and being constantly terrified. I think you'd be wise to seek medical help tbh.

I don't think the effects of climate change are going to be imminently cataclysmic for most people in most communities. Your children and their children will likely have more comfortable lives than those born a few generations back, or than many people in impoverished countries have today.

That's about the cheeriest spin I can put on it.

Thanks for taking the time to read and reply. I do appreciate I have a tendency to over react and take things to heart. Focusing on the positive and quite possibly medication is probably the way forward.

In the mid 80's (Greenham Common and that) we lived through the threat of the 4 minute warming.
It was scary
but you had to get on with living each day as best you could so that when we came out the other end you could smile at yourself.

Climate change is a bugger
but you getting anxious will not improve it.
Do what practical things you can - reduce your family's carbon footprint, remind your MP that your vote is contingent on their action, ditto your local councillors

And then get yourself some CBT / Mindfulness based stress reduction
as then your worries will not stop your children growing up with optimism and energy
because there are glimmers of hope
and we have to hang on to them to reach them.

Agree with Talkinpeece re practical advice, and try to remember that negative thoughts aren't benefitting anyone, least of all you.

I know that's easy to say, but I agree with pp about practising mindfulness. I can't remember the source, but I remember reading about a study where after six weeks of mindfulness people had actually changed the activity of their brain from tendencies towards negative thinking to more positive thought patterns, which reduces anxiety. It's worth giving it a try.

Thanks so much for your kind and thoughtful replies. They are much appreciated. I suppose there is still hope for the human race when people care enough to reply to a neurotic woman on the internet.

You have all made good points. I have no idea how I would have coped with the threat of the 4 min warning, not well I'm guessing...! I think I need to give myself a shake, think about how bloody fortunate I actually am and focus on what I can do rather than what may happen. I've downloaded a book called 'Active Hope' which I've seen recommended on the climate change threads which I'm hoping will help.

Thanks everyone for taking the time to reply. I tend to laugh off or make a huge joke out of my anxiety in real life. It has helped to get it out a bit and have sensible counter arguments, thanks again.

The other week I saw a presentation about positive thinking
it boiled down to ....
every day find a few things that were good - no matter how small
eg somebody holding a door open for you or letting you into a traffic queue

and anything bad, try to think what positive reason they had for behaving in the way they did

there will be one
eg the muppet who cut you up was trying to get home to hug his family

its about seeking the positive
and not allowing negative to eat you up

if nothing else, if you have more positive energy and can pass that on to your kids,
they might just get enough scientific knowledge to save us from the worst effects of climate change

Ah Talkinpeece I think your username should be Talkinsense. Thanks I'll try that.

Funnily enough I was talking career choices with the DC last night. The older one was not impressed but the 4 year old says he's definitely going to be a scientist. So we're all saved then....!

I'm no expert, but yes, give it a go.
Things can only get better

'. So am I a lunatic who should just stop reading the news and get some anti anxiety medication?'

You aren't a lunatic but I think those would be steps that could help have a positive impact on your life

It is really worrying but you also need to remember you are one of the lucky ones living in a rich country in a stable part of the world with a relatively mild climate. The ones who are really vulnerable are the ones far more exposed to the climate shocks with far fewer resources to adapt - and, for the most part, the ones who did least to cause the problem.

JudasPrudy, I think you are right. I've been very anxious about other things but managed in the past, but this just feels bigger.

Gushpanka, you are right and thank you for a bigger perspective. Let's hope changes now can avoid disaster or at least minimise it. It is absolutely unfair that those who have done the least may suffer the most, just so heartbreaking.

Hello fuckingterrified, I saw your post on the thread in the climate change and thought I'd pop in to say hi here.

I think that there are a lot of people feeling the way you are, and for someone who is already susceptible to anxiety this crisis will feel overwhelming. And because our society is VERY good at avoiding talking about the really bad things (no-one likes to be a Debbie Downer), and our media and governments act as though climate change is almost irrelevant, and we can see everyone around us just continuing on with life as if the the very real prospect of civilisation collapsing within our lives is just a crack pot conspiracy (it's not), it's easy to feel completely isolated and second guess yourself if you are the one reacting 'normal'.

I think having anxiety about the crisis is actually a fair and totally human reaction. We are right to be alarmed, especially those of us with young kids. I think it's feeling isolated in that anxiety that makes it spin out of control and overwhelmed us. We need to be less afraid to speak of this, less ashamed that we are being negative or alarmist. Through sharing our sense of fear and loss, we can connect with others, share our pain. We can cry together and then help each other get up and get to work to averting the crisis. We have a short window of time but there are many things we can do. There are lots of people working on this around the world and we need all the help we can get, and you will gain strength from working with them.

Yes Active Hope is absolutely amazing, and there are many great suggestions here, I'm actually using CBD oil and breathing exercises to keep calmer and focussed. And working all my spare hours on Extinction Rebellion.

If anyone else is reading this and feeling the same, you are not alone. Come and find us on a thread about children, climate and extinction in the Climate Change talk section.

I feel the same as you OP and I am not a 'panicky' or easy to upset person. After reading a thread on MN 3 days ago I have already made huge changes. Knowing that I am doing more to help has helped me feel calmer.
We should be prioritising this over everything - Brexit is insignificant in comparison. We must keep the conversation going and stop burying our heads in the sand. You are not alone and there is hope.

Thanks so much for the replies. @Fridakahlofan totally agree that this should be top priority. I just don't understand if we are so worried and moved by this, why the people with actual real power to change legislation are not acting? There obviously an appetite for change. I do not believe anyone wants the future that scientists are predicting so why isn't more being done? I know my views are probably naive but if we can see it why can't they?

@Amibambini thank you so much for your kind and inspiring post. That probably sounds very cringey but I don't care. I've found your posts really helpful, on this thread and the threads in climate change. We are here, there is hope. No point me crying into my recycling bin when I could be doing something more useful instead.

Thanks to all who have posted. I said it earlier in the thread but I find it so comforting that people will take time to reply and try to help in some way.

Why isn't more been done

Because all the people who could do something are too old to care like Trump. He's made his millions and literally just wants to shore it up until the end. So many people in charge in their 60/70/80's like him.

I care but even I don't care enough - like all humans I'm essentially selfish. And I will also be dead by the time it's over.

We need to REALLY care. Never fly, never buy glitter, stop eating meat, stop having children.

TBH if everybody in the West did a few things, it would make a huge difference ....

• stop wasting food - buy what you will eat, no more
• stop buying tat that ends up in the bin - particularly cheap clothes and "decorative items"
• eat less meat and make it local / free range
• try to reduce the amount you throw away to 1/8 of a wheelie bin per person per week
• try to drive less (or not at all if you live in an area with public transport)
• turn the heating down in the day and off at night - wear jumpers in winter
• try to insulate your home to reduce heating costs
• shower not bath and only wash clothes when they are dirty, not after each wearing
• shop carefully - try to reduce packaging and waste

Basically its about Westerners starting to walk more lightly on the earth.

A child in America consumes 10,000 times the resources of a child in Tanzania
A child in the west halving its consumption of the earths resources will offset for many hundreds of Africans dragging themselves out of poverty.

The next generation are our best hope.
Get them into the habit of walk lightly and study science and they may be able to undo some of the damage of the Trumps of the world.

@LaurieFairyCake I the your point to a certain degree, but I think enough people are starting to care enough to make a difference. And quite frankly fuck Trump.

@Talkinpeece that really puts things into perspective. I feel like we've been brainwashed into wanting 'things' and it is such a massive waste of resources. I hope we can all wake up in time.

No, no one is starting to care enough. We need to make massive changes and it needs to be govt led or we are going to be almost extinct in 2 generations

We're all too polite to even say to each other why are you having children? If you must have one, make it only one.

^^ see how bad it is I've said that - it's shocking isn't it?

But that is actually what NEEDS to happen

(I want to take it back, it's so bad )

Lauriefairycake - do you have kids? And I have no idea how old you are but you won't be dead by the time you see it taking drastic effect on your life and the lives of your kids if you have them. This isn't something that is happening in 50 years, it's happening now, and is likely to spiral, particularly once the arctic is ice free in the summer, which could be within 2-10 years.

It is easy to take the nihilist view, that it's all gone to shit and it isn't worth caring because no-one else does. It's easy because it requires nothing of you. But I cannot imagine saying that was my response to my 4 year old, when she is 16 and asking what we did when we knew. I look at all the school kids striking in Australia, at their intelligence and passion, I watch (and throw my strength behind) the rising of Extinction Rebellion around the world. I watch the blazing power of the youth from the Sunrise Movement as they occupied Nancy Pelosi's office to fight for a Green New Deal.

I place my hope, and my power with them. People are finding each other, finding their collective power and reasons to hope for a liveable future. It's easy to ignore it when you stay cocooned in the same channel of business as usual, because it's safer and more comfortable there. But it won't stay that way, even for the rich and comfortable middle class Englanders.

In the next few decades, the rug is going to swept out from beneath the feet of business-as-usual civilisation. Everything is going to change. Do we just ignore the shifting we already feel under our feet? Cross our fingers that when we eventually fall we magically land upright? Or do we start preparing now? Start fighting for our futures, now?

And no I don't find it shocking to talk about only having one kid, it's a common topic of conversation among many of my child-rearing age friends. But my friends do talk about climate change and the future, so.

I think generally though, a lot of people are too 'polite' to even really talk about climate change. Our media have completely and utterly failed to communicate the truth of the matter. Capitalism has ensured that our exhaustion allows limited time for contemplation of what really matters, we finish work and would rather numb ourselves with pretty stories. But I feel we are now entering a time where we are being forced to wake up, forced to confront the realities of the systems that control our lives. What we do with this brutal awakening is up to us.

Haven't read the whole thread, but you are not alone. A lot of people feel grief and terror about this. It's actually a pretty rational response.

The new Extinction Rebellion movement does a lot of stuff about shared grieving. It's hard to cope with the facts without going into denial or depression, especially when those around you seem to have their head in the sand.

Amibambini

I'm sure it's happening now but it's not at all visible to the vast majority of people. Look at the shops still crammed with stuff.

I don't think it's going to be visible for decades, by then way too late to do anything.

No bio children for me. Will defo be dead by 30 years when it properly starts according to the ipcc

Hi everyone,

I'm a freelance journalist (BBC, Guardian, The Times, Independent) and I'm looking into a story on climate change and children, and the dilemma parents face about educating their children on climate change. I came across this thread and I'd be really interested in talking to some of you about you experiences. If anyone would like to get in touch, please could you email me at [email protected]? Thanks!