To ask how do you do it ??

[anxiousmotherof1]

Back at full time work for a week now . My ds does not sleep through far from it . He woke up five times yesterday . Just came out of the office to get some proper coffee or else i will sleep at my desk .
Am sure there lots of working parents here with non sleepers ! How do you do it ??

I went back when my DS was 6 months old, because I'm a gimmer and that's how it was back then. He didn't sleep through and it nearly killed me. I did controlled crying with him at 13 months old, because I no longer felt safe when I drove the car, couldn't make a decision at work and couldn't even follow a conversation. It was a turning point and whilst everything was still fairly knackering, it became doable.

I have actually dropped off at my desk, sitting up with the computer mouse in my hand.

Looking back, I don't know how I did it. My DS has ASD and didn't sleep through until he was diagnosed at age 6 and put on medication. When the paediatrician asked me how was his sleep I replied he hadn't got past the newborn stage yet - 5 to 8 wakings a night was not unusual.

I lived off coffee, sugar and power naps on my lunch break. Some days I was so tired I hallucinated and typed some incredible bollocks on my computer. I fell asleep at my desk or in meetings too. Work was not supportive, suggested it was my parenting and I got so stressed by it all I ended up off work sick for a while. All that meant was I could nap when he was at school (he was 4 by this point).

When he did sleep finally it was like a holiday! He's 12 now and sleeps thanks to a combination of melatonin and CBD. But he still doesn't sleep until 11pm-12am most nights.

@MargoLovebutter i tried controlled crying but is not for my ds he cried so much he vomited so cannot do that again :(

@TittyFahLaEtcetera that sounds horrible ! Hope he is better now :(

I went back full time when my DS was 9 months. He's 19 months now and still wakes 2 - 3 times on a good night. I really struggled at first but I think my brain has just come to accept functioning on broken sleep now or at least functioning at bare minimum level to get me through the day. Mind you, I now go to bed at 9pm every night to try and make up for it!

Aw, anxiousmotherof1, I'm so sorry. It will just be a case of gritting your teeth then.

Mine are pretty much grown up now, but the endurance test that was my return to work is still etched into my mind.

Be careful driving though - being tired is so bad for reactions and judgement. I had a near miss and that frightened me so much, I knew I couldn't continue that way.

@Lightsong atill at 19 months ?? I feel for you !!

Cosleeping with either parent taking turns to cosleep and the other getting a night in the spare bed.

@Jackshouse we are already co sleeping !

Cosleeping, breastfeeding, and going to bed at 8.00 p.m. every night for a year. I love my sleep and managed to get to the point where I could sleep through a whole night.

I'm just really really fucking tired.

I went back to work for the sleep - the hour on the train morning and evening was the best sleep I'd had for months.

Continuous snacking and sweet sucking was how I kept awake at work.

My DS didn't sleep through until he was 2, it was a nightmare! i was working full time and also studying in the evenings, I do look back and wonder how I coped and also 12 years down the line find it hard to believe it happened because if I am disturbed even once a night now I am dreadful the next day!!

Yes but every on other night you leave the baby asleep with your partner and you go and sleep in the spare bed.

@MereDintofPandiculation yes to snacking ;p unfortunately i drove to woek so i cannot nap !

That should be drive to work! Its past three am starting to shut down

When waking in the night was really bad with my DC3, I got into the habit of wearing a thick eye mask (ooh glamourous!) which I found helped me get back into a deeper sleep much more quickly... so say 4 blocks of 1.5 hours sleep during the night would feel like an okay amount. Fast forward 5 years - I am still wedded to my eye mask and wouldn't be without it!!

I also knew friends that had similar problems, and decided to sleep in separate bedrooms, so the baby would be in the room with one parent for one night, then in with the other parent for the next.. At the time, our friends said it made it bearable as you would know you were only 24 hours away from a completely unbroken night's sleep. HTH :)

I am also just really fucking tired. DS1 is 7 and DS2 is 4. I can count on 2 hands the number of times both have slept through the same night.

DS1 was still waking 8 times a night aged 3

My work quality has seriously degraded (took me ages to think of that word, not even sure if it's the right one) and my career stalled.

Even a sleep consultant didn't have much effect.

I don't drink coffee or coke and I wonder if that helps as my body doesn't crave caffeine to keep going. I do eat a lot of chocolate thought

Oh and I'm in bed at 9.30pm every night. And whenever DH is away on business I have both DC in my room (one in bed, one on a mattress on the floor) so I can just lie in bed and say shhh rather than get up.

I used holiday days to catch up on sleep :( having an understanding boss helps; I was really lucky in that mine was very flexible with my lateness, and even occasionally my calling off that very morning of I truly felt it would be unsafe for me to drive in. Luckily I have the kind of job where the hours I keep don't affect anybody else, so kind as I get all the work done when it's required.

*long, not kind!

Berocca and Spatone every morning. Lots of coffee. Acceptance that I will be exhausted but this, too, shall pass.

You have my every sympathy.

Oh I was here too with my first. I worked 3-4 long days a week (11 hr days) to make full time hours in a difficult role. I’d wprked years to get there and just was so tired. Even though I felt I was coping at the time I made huge mistakes (in finance so not great) and really it effected my professional reputation. Looking back I think it must have been the sleep deprivation.

@BangingOn oh did spatone help ? I keep meaning to buy some vitamins but is just so far down the list of things to do !

Do you have a partner? During the really bad stages, I'd get 4.5 hours from 8-12.30 and he'd have till 5.30.
But DD is 1.5 now and occasionally will sleep through from 8 till 5.
It's hard, but you will eventually get through it. My friend ended up hiring a sleep consultant and I know of other people who hired night nannies. I couldn't afford that so it was just slogging through. I know she sleeps better when she's spent lots of time outside.