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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to worry about long drive with 5 week old?

3 replies

Lornette · 23/11/2018 07:01

I'm about to bake a 190 mike trip in a car on my own with a 5 week old baby. Not ideal but it's a family emergency and I need to be with my brother. He's feeling suicidal and has tried to commit suicide in the past. I had a good sleep last night so at least I'm not knackered but I'm quite emotional and have a cluster feeding baby with me...

Any tips? I'm a confident driver but feel so nervous...

OP posts:
SoyDora · 23/11/2018 07:02

Stop regularly. Ideally a 5 week old shouldn’t be spending more than 30 mins at a time in the car seat. Allow a long time for your journey and make sure you stop and get the baby out/walk around etc.
Hope your brother is ok.

WoodyOak · 23/11/2018 07:05

I don't have any tips on the drive that you won't have already thought about. Just wanted to say that I hope you are ok. Supporting someone when they are depressed is really tough. Important to remember that you are not responsible for the actions of others. Does your brother have someone closer who can offer support? Take care of yourself.

BikeRunSki · 23/11/2018 07:21

OK. You can do this, but it will take time. I used to drive to DM - 260 miles - every 6 weeks or so with DS from about 5 weeks old.,How are you feeling post birth? Are you a confident driver? Is there anyone (adult) who coukd come with you?

Could you go by train?
Could you stop in a Premier Inn type place overnight and fo two shorter journeys?
Do you have friends or family on the way who you could stop with for a coffee/overnight?

A 5 week old should be fairly straightforward - at least he won’t want to be out there and running around.

Plan your route. Even if you know it, I used to sat nav it anyway1 - to remind me to leave the motorway if I was distracted! 2- in case I had to change route for closures etc.

Plan where you are going to stop to feed/change nappies/wiggle around. Don’t forget to feed yourself. Have other “backup” stops in mind in case you or your baby needs it. When my dc were small, advice was not to spend more than 2 hours in a car seat at a time. We used to stop for 20-30 mins every 2 hours. I don’t know what current guidance is, but I’ve seen you can get lie flat car seats now.

Download something interesting to listen too or chose some music you enjoy.,

I used to take DS swimming beforehand to tire him out, then travel early evening whilst he slept. He was very easy to transfer to a cotbince we arrived though. 5 weeks might be a bit young for swimming (although DS went at 6 weeks after his first vaccinations).

That’s my practical advice. I know that won’t help emotionally, and that every baby is different. I hope it goes well. Good luck.

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