To expect more interest from family

[SeeingisSeeing]

My OH family only live a short distance away and show no interest in our kids. I have a huge issue with this as when it suits them (when strangers ask, on social media etc) they make out that they are totally devoted to them. The kids were recently very ill with one of them hospitalised for a week and they didnt even show their faces then. OH says to me that he knows they should make more effort however he wont confront the situation which leaves me in an awful predicament where i just want to rant and rave and tell them exactly the problem but know that it isnt down to me to put them in their place.

AIBU to expect my husband to actually say something?

You can't make people interested in your kids.

Treasure the people who make an effort because they are priceless.

At least they aren't overbearing. I think that can cause worse problems.

Honestly OP I wouldn't waste your breath

I remember being a single mother and my parents who lived a five minute walk away would not babysit so I could walk to the library. I stopped asking after a while

They aren't interested. It isn't your fault, but they won't conform to this idea you have in your head (as I did) of how family life should/would be

When the kids grow up, the Grandparents will reap the benefits of grandkids, who in return, don't give a fuck right back

Pressed send too soon

My parents often snide comment now (twenty years later) oh your DS/DD dont ring us

And I always flare back and say 'when was the last time you rang them?' and the answer in reality would be never. Yet they seem to have this expectation that they deserve some kind of feigned closeness and act aghast even though my parents created this situation

I totally agree with the respondents so far - you won’t make them care by ranting at them (speaks from experience - all that happened was I got the silent treatment for ages then it went on as before).

Build relationships with people that reciprocate.

My ils lived less than ten mins away. Never bothered with us. We moved and wemt nc. She told people we had blocked her from dc's lives!
Just look at it like less people you have to juggle.
It's actually bloody blissful!