Not sure if I'm being unreasonable or if it's just part of life

[Clueless20something]

But none of my close friends make much of an effort of staying in touch.

We're all in our early twenties and have been friends from school and are starting to have things happen in our lives like babies, marriage and houses.

They're all meant to be bridesmaids at my wedding.

But none of them make any effort to touch base with to see how things are. We have a group chat and try to meet up at least once a month. I've text all of them separately to see how they're getting on if we haven't spoke in a while but never had anything back.

I know if something drastic happened they would always be there and that it is part of life that people drift apart but it Just makes me so sad sometimes....

In my experience, just a sad fact of life. I am jealous of people I know who habe stayed close with a big group of high school friends. The best friends I have are the ones I've made in my 20s from work, husband's colleagues, and mum friends I've made at baby groups. These feel like lasting friendships because we all knew who we were when we met and are compatible as friends rather than being school friends despite being very different people. Hope you find your 'squad' in the coming years! I felt a bit lonely in the gap between school friends and adult friends but I think that's normal.

Part of life. Sorry.

I have no friends from school, one from childhood (but not school). One from when I was in my twenties and the rest are all from the last decade. Just keep making friends to replace the lost ones, otherwise you'll end up without.

Part of life. The main thing is that they're there when you need them. How far away is the wedding?

If you have a group chat and meet up once a month, that sounds like quite a lot of contact to me!

I think it's part of life but I also think it's unreasonable. I don't think it's a good part of life and it annoys me

Just to clarify yes once a month is really good.

But the not replying is bad.

It's just life. My best friends from school and I have a WhatsApp group we chat in and we try to meet annually (all live in different places) but certainly don't stay in regular contact. As your life changes so does you friendship circle usually. In my twenties it was mainly uni and work friends, late twenties when started having children - NCT friends, now it's other school mums and workmates. Your priorities shift with life, time becomes a rare commodity and also some people - myself included I'm ashamed to say - are just crap at keeping in touch unless you see the person regularly. It's not that they don't care or think about you, it's just a case of "ooo when I've got a sec I'll text xyz and see how they are" and then before you know it 3 weeks have passed.
Monthly meeting to me sounds great and I don't think I'd want any more than that but it's different for everyone. My advice would be enjoy the time you spend with them but maybe widen your circle a bit more to fill in the gaps if you need to.

I'm early 20s too and I see my 2 best friends about once a week and we chat through text pretty much daily. However, we're not married and don't have families yet just partners, so I suppose that will reduce when we have children. But I hope not too much!

I'm lucky we all make it a priority to spend time together and I really hope it continues. I think it's sad when friends don't touch base with each other, it's so important to have friends.

Thanks all.

It just feels a bit sad every now and again with it!

We'll just have to see what happens.