To not want to socialise that much ?

[Bornin1969]

I work 50 hours a week, mum of 2 kids. I have barely any energy left in the evening so the bit I have left is for my family obviously. Same for the week end when I’m often shattered. It’s harder during that time of the year not so bad when it’s airing/summer. I have friends who always to meet up for coffees/drinks but none of them work full time. I feel guilty for rebuffing them but on the end I’m shattered. I was in bed before 10 last night. Sorry I get it’s a very boring post but it would be interesting to hear if people can relate !

I can totally relate. DH and I work shifts, often opposite each other and I am a complete introvert. Our lives have to be planned pretty far in advance to ensure we have the DC, school runs, clubs etc covered. The 'advance planning' makes us seem very anti-social as most of our friends are able to be more spontaneous. More importantly, I just cannot be bothered to make small talk over drinks when I'm exhausted, which is most nights. I have a physical job and I'm normally in bed by 10pm latest.

I have a couple of very good friends, introverts like me, and we can tolerate each other for short, twice-yearly day trips when the kids are at school.

Yes I’m tired too but do try and keep up with close friends. I’ll lose them otherwise

I work full time and have two primary aged kids. I never over book myself and reserve evenings out for close friends which they are aware will be few and far between and booked well in advance (but worth it!!). Others I fit in during my working day - v flexible job - so do breakfasts, lunches and coffees. I'm always shattered but socialising is super important for my mental health. I go to bed v early (8.45 last night!).

Yanbu! I'm just contemplating going to work three days a week and I'm shitting myself! The hours you're working sound unhealthy.

No, I get it. Some of my friends are constantly "on the go" with organising social events, but I'm happy with a coffee date once a fortnight. I just need quiet weekends at home to recharge.

I make the effort to see them but they organise meet up constantly! I can’t keep up !

I don't have children and can't cope with the frenetic social life some of my friends like to have.

working and commuting is enough. Social stuff, for me, now needs to be close by. I've taken redundancy but after a couple of times trekking into town to meet people, I just thought, no. I have close friends for whom I would do a lot, but constant drinks, coffee etc when you are tired and working long hours....throwing DC into the mix would make it a very rare thing for me, once a month maybe?

I also work out so I guess I have spare physical energy but sometimes it's the mental energy that is the issue.

If your genuinely too tired, then you don't need to make excuses.

But keep in touch in other ways.

I know lots of Women who find themselves quite isolated/lacking Friends when their children get older, or their relationship ends.

Be honest with your friends and if you can, try to make it every couple of Months.

YANBU.....I work 55 hour weeks in a physically demanding job.Up at 7 home by 1015/days off I'm exhausted.Besides spending all day with people I love the idea.of doing what I want.housework tv and chilling.Do want is good for you.