WIN I to think I've failed as a mum

[CantThinkOfNameOops]

My DS is nearly 2 and for the last year or so ahs been so fussy with his eating and will only eat toast. he doesn't overfill on fluids and he definitely is hungry when I put food in front of him but he just won't try anything. also I've seen other kids around his age who can say a lot more and say basic sentences and listen to things like "bring me your shoes" etc but DS can only name different animals, make some animal sounds, say "car", "door" and "shoes". I feel like maybe I haven't done enough, like maybe I messed up when I started weaning him onto solids and that's why he's fussy now and that maybe I haven't done enough to teach him how to talk properly. I've recently had another baby and when the HV came to see the baby she made a comment about how DS isn't saying much and is mainly babbling. I'm feeling so s* about it all

Please don’t feel shit. My 27 month old is such a picky eater - some days he’ll have barely anything and sometimes he’ll have loads. They all develop at their own rate language wise too and boys tend to talk later than girls. How are you feeling generally? It sounds like you might be low and it’s making you focus on this?

yeah ive been feeling a bit low i guess. new baby not sleepibg much so im really tired and run down. i thought ds was picking uo worda pretty quick but after going to a play group amd seeing other children his age saying a lot more i started to wonder if something might be wrong. then when the hv commented on it, it hit a nerve I suppose. worried if it is my fault then I might make the same mistakes with dd

Assuming that you chat to your DS during the day and have offered him a variety of foods, then you are not doing anything wrong. Fussiness in toddlers is totally normal. All children develop speech at different rates. If it does turn out that his speech is not coming along as it should, then it won't have been anything you have done, and your HV should be able to help out.

Aw, don't be beating yourself up OP. I'm sure your DS is absolutely fine. I was minding my friend's DD today. She's 22 months and except for Mama, Dada and her big brother's name, she doesn't really say anything else.
Her parents had her checked our, they were particularly worried about her hearing but everything is fine and they were told she'll talk in her own time and probably won't stop when she does!
She understands everything. When I ask her to bring me certain toys etc she knows exactly what they are and if I ask where her eyes, ears etc are she'll point them out no problem.
I'm sure your DS knows all those things too, and for what it's worth, it's hard to find a 2 year old that's NOT picky when it comes to food

My daughter is 3.5 and despite being a dellightfullt east to wean baby, has for the last year, been a nightmare re food. It holds no interest for her at all and she is small for her age (from birth), so my mother is obsessed with what she eats, which I find stressful. I am very keen not to make food an issue so just roll with it as best I can whilst still introducing new (old, actually) food to her.

She was late to walk in terms of walking about the place on her own, late to talk in sentences (all is well now, she told me not to shush her because it’s rude, just a few hours ago).

Your boy sounds totally fine, based on my own experience with my child, her “lateness” was not a concern to the HV or any other doctor. Indeed at the same time I was worried about her speech, a doctor at one of my own appointments commented her language was very good

You haven’t done anything wrong OP - the fact you care enough to post tells me you’re a good mum I have a two year old also and she has gone notoriously picky with food recently. She used to eat everything - now she wants grapes 24/7 and not much else! Nothing has changed at home or in her life so I’m putting it down to normal toddler fussiness and will start squeezing her for soon!

It’s a phase, it will pass and his speech will improve soon I’m sure. Be kind to yourself, it’s hard work with a new baby you have enough on your plate without extra worries x

thanks everyone. Guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens