To ask about your small (20 guests or less) wedding?

[xyz890]

Where did you get married? What did you do afterwards? How did you find somewhere small enough?

I've started looking for a venue for our small (civil) wedding, there will be about 18 guests plus us, so 20 in total. I'm finding it difficult to find venues as 'small' seems to be defined as at least 50 guests.

I wouldn't mind a registry office followed by a meal in a good restaurant. But all our local registry offices seem to have the atmosphere of a conference room in a third rate hotel!

I guess therefore that we will need to find a hotel or similar that has a licence for civil weddings and where we can also hold our reception. I don't want us to feel lost in a room that's designed to hold 50 or more guests though.

Inspire me!

Don't think I can help to be honest! We ran away to a small Scottish island and got married in the registry office there with 4 guests and then went up to the local hotel for bacon rolls. Registry office has no atmosphere at all, but island is fabulous, registrar and deputy registrar are lovely people , post man and shop keeper came out to wish us well and hotel opened early for us. All of that is much more important to me. (Registrar could have married us anywhere on the island but we weren't convinced DH's very elderly granny and great aunt would have made it down to our favourite beach on the island). Hotel is often listed as one of the best boutique hotels in Britain though.

My friend and her fiance have planned a registry office wedding then a limo with 10 guests to a smart hotel ; Canapes on arrival plus a cocktail or beer then a sit down 3 course meal with free flowing wine.I really can't wait (I'm also maid of honour!) It will be lovely and intimate

We had 30 guests - so small but not quite as small as yours. We went to our local big city registry office, as it's beautiful and has different size rooms, so we booked one which fit a max of 35 people.

We looked at loads of options for after - we found a few pubs close by which had a private room upstairs and would let us order off the main menu. There was a big hotel close by who had a small restaurant who would could let us have the restaurant if we ordered off an expensive set menu. The one we went for in the end was a restaurant/bar which has a private upstairs room with own entrance. They let us have the venue for a minimum spend, which was fairly reasonable, we got to design the menu with the chef and paid for pretty much all drinks by pre-ordering cocktails for the arrival, wine and beer with the meal. If we had wanted we could have got married there too, but loved the registry office.

We got married late afternoon, went to the venue, had a couple of drinks and photos then had a meal at 6pm, afterwards we all just sat around chatting. Loved it.

I would suggest ringing around some places locally and seeing if they have smaller spaces to hire, we found even some of the big hotel style venues catered for much smaller parties with smaller rooms.

Good luck, small weddings are the best in my bias opinion!

We had 12. We got married in a country house hotel and hired a private room there for the meal.

It’s your wedding and you can have whatever you want! I wanted a small wedding of 20-30 but got bullied by in laws into having 100. I really regret it.

I am now helping my friend with her small wedding (approx 15) and have found it you approach venues who typically have larger groups but at late notice (under six months) they’re more willing to work with you to accommodate your needs.

we had a registry office wedding ( rubbish atmosphere but done and dusted in 10 minutes) then we all ( 14 of us) got taxis to a michelin star restaurant where we had a private sitting room for pre meal drinks and nibbles. we also took games for the 6 kids there. then into private dining room for feasting and drinking all round one big table.
registry was as late in the afternoon as we could.
it was fab. really really fab.

I had a small wedding. 18 people all in. We booked the second smallest room in a registry office. The room itself was lovely, the staff out out nice silk flowers and we provided our own CD of music. Then we also went out for a late lunch and drinks at a local restaurant.

We had 15 in total. Late registry office do and straight to pub for an hour then restraunt. Do it 😁

Do whatever you want and they just announced that the law will be changed to allow more venues and outside. Some registry offices are nice eg Oxford (well a few years ago it was), Paignton was nice too.

Another option is the lady chapel of a church, ours holds a maximum of 36 and is just a mini church really - we have had spoken only services (no music) for those not liking the registry office.

Scotland has different rules, more flexible.

Youngest son had less than 20 the venue (he was married there as well) had folding doors so the huge room was more intimate for the meal. Then opened up in the evening for other guests and dancing. Daughter in law sourced all wedding favours and cufflinks etc from e bay so nothing v expensive

We had 17 people in total.

We got married in our parish church and had a harpist instead of hymns.

We had our reception at a local wedding venue. They hired out smaller rooms for private events as well as their big ballroom. We had a big oval table to seat everyone, beautiful floral arrangements and yummy food.

We had the marriage ceremony at 4 so we got back to the hotel around 5.30. We had a proper photographer and served drinks and nibbles whilst we were posing!

At about 7ish we sat down for dinner - had a long meal, a couple of speeches and around 10.30most people went to their rooms. We stayed with our closest friends for another hour or so and then when everyone left DH turned down the lights so we only had our candles, put on ‘our’ song and we had a first dance in private.

We viewed several venues and loads had options for small weddings. We looked at posh hotels, country houses and smaller restaurants.

Thanks everyone.

It’s your wedding and you can have whatever you want! I know - I just haven't been able to find what I want

It's not the first time for either of us. I would like a special room that's the right size and a lovely meal after.

Good to know that venues may be more accommodating at less than 6 months notice - we will want it to be soon, probably less than 6 months.

10 including us, in the Old Blacksmiths in Gretna Green. (not the big tourist complex with shops but a tiny old building on the other side) Then a meal in a hotel after who took pity on me (pregnant and ill) and gave us a separate room away from the rest of the hotel restaurant f.o.c. It was really lovely

Hi OP. We had just our two best friend's (who are also a couple) and our DS at our wedding. We got married at our Town Hall (have you checked out the other community venues besides your registry office?). Our town hall is a gorgeous venue.

We then went and had photos by the castle and its grounds adjacent to the Town Hall.

Before heading off to our "wedding breakfast / reception" the 5 of us went to mine and DH's favourite bar (close to the Town Hall) for a nice cocktail. Staff there were brilliant, they know me pretty well anyway as it has always been my regular.

We had our "wedding breakfast" in a 5* hotel at top of the road where I grew up, it used to be an old vacant listed building that always captured my heart and now its a gorgeous boutique hotel. Although we didnt have a "proper wedding" the hotel were amazing at securing us a cosy little room for the 5 of us to have a lovely meal together and then we all went to another small cosy room to have drinks and let DS stretch his legs a bit more.

Talk to your fav places and see if they might be able to cater for your party size. I am sure if people know it is for your wedding day they will be able to help find ways to make it special.

That sounds lovely Bertram. No church for us, but otherwise the kind of thing I'm imagining. It's useful to hear your timings as with less folk to shepherd, photograph etc I don't want long gaps where there's nothing going on and also too few for dancing etc in the evening.

We got married late afternoon in a small chapel that's part of our family church. FIL (retired minister) married us and a friend did the rest of the service. We lit it with candles and had a cello and piano to accompany the hymns. It was absolutely gorgeous. It was near Christmas so my SIL organised a big real tree and decorated it for us beautifully. We had coffee and home made cake in the church hall while we did photos, and then had the most amazing five course meal (most of it a la carte) in a private room at an amazing nearby restaurant. The following week we went back to our home city and had a massive party (150+) at a local pub with great food. It was all perfect, I wouldn't change a thing. We arranged it in about 5 and a half months and I found that was plenty of time.

We had around 35 guests nearly 20 years ago. We found a lovely restaurant situated near a lake. There was a small 'island' on the lake accessible by a bridge - that was my aisle. The ceremony was conducted on the island by a celebrant. The guests went back to the restaurant for canapés while we had our photos taken (didn't have to stray too far as we already had a lovely backdrop).

What was best about it (as foodies) was we picked what dishes 3 choices (guests chose their preferences) for each course. Much nicer than chicken, beef,chicken,beef and meals swapped across the table. We had a lunchtime booking 11-4pm. So we got away early to start the wedding night.

Our town hall is one of the options I've had a quick look at online. It used to be the registry office and is a nice room - I think they realised that they could make more money by hiring it out and moved the registry office to the grotty library instead!

We had eight people. We got married overseas, we were married outdoors but went back to the hotel in the afternoon to cut cake. For the evening we booked a top notch restaurant's private dining area. I was slightly self conscious walking through in my wedding dress and going to loo etc, but it was fine. I had a lovely wedding day.

We had 10 at our wedding.

Married in small side chapel of church then we went to a Michelin star restaurant for lunch. Super laid back day.

We got married in a register office with just parents there. Then went to a nice restaurant for lunch then on to a beautiful old country house that we had hired for the week (big holiday cottage).

The rest of our guests joined us at the house that evening and all spent the night as it had rooms for all. The next morning we all dressed up, that's when I wore the nice dress had bridesmaids etc and an old family friend who is a vicar preformed a blessing for us in the orangery. We then had caterers who were incredible for a really good sit down meal, complete with waiters! We then had a huge lovely house for the evening. Nobody had to drive, I'd bought all the booze and had a huge range so people could drink what they wanted and the caterers came back in the evening to do a buffet. Plus no guests had to pay expensive bar costs or hotel prices. It was awesome!

There were 18 of us in total.

It was cheaper then any small wedding deal I'd found at any hotels or the like as well!

We did a register office and meal. We travelled across a country boarder (we're West Yorkshire and married in North Yorkshire) for a nice office and city. We asked for people to pay for their meals instead of gifts. Organised a big meal and then a lot of us carried on in the local bars until the early hours.

It was the best day ever. I loved every second.

Having had a small (18) wedding in the days when you were allowed to get married only in church or registry office, I have to say the atmosphere was created overwhelmingly by the people present. Registry office was in a temporary room because of building works (normally it would have been in a beautiful room overlooking the park) reception at DPs home, photos in garden, but different from ordinary family gathering because of the mixture of guests (2 families, friends), everyone was dressed up to the 9s, lovely wedding cake. It was just a lovely happy day.

We had 20 guests at a local hotel, using one of their reception rooms for the service and one for a sit down meal. Harp music throughout and a small cake at the end. No wild party, but beautiful and elegant.

Hired a small castle (it was fortified farm house really). It was rented out as a holiday home, rather than a wedding venue, so it was pretty cheap to hire it for four days and four nights.

We organised a caterer ourselves for the wedding meal, we just bought loads of wine/champagne for the caterers to serve and also hired a pop-up cocktail bar to serve drinks into the evening (plus left out spare wine/champagne for people to help themselves). We booked local pub for rehearsal dinner, local cafe for lunch day of the wedding. We stocked the fridge in the kitchen really with bacon, eggs, veggie sausages, juice, bread etc. and had a massive fruit bowl, so people staying could just help themselves.

Had ceremony in small village church a stone’s throw away.

There were plenty of bedrooms, so most guests stayed the night before and night after the wedding. We had a night with the place to ourselves either side. Before hand we decorated the place a bit, afterwards was a good start to our honeymoon!

As for entertainment, there were various rooms at the venue. A living room, a dining room (cocktail bar was set up there), plus a room with a snooker table. People just moved about rooms, chatting to one another. There was sound system to pipe music through which we loaded off an iPhone. There was also a small hall with lovely chandelier and table that seated 20, that’s where we had the meal.