To be SICK of reminding my mum and mil that my kids can't have treats CONSTANTLY

[spoonfulofmuck]

"Oh go on! Let DC's have some sweets!"
"No harm in letting them stay up way past bedtime every night!"
"They tried really hard to eat their tea let them have a pudding!" (when DC has not eaten any tea...)

I always say "I certainly wouldn't of been able to do x,y,z when i was younger and neither are my DC" FFS A

I think the occasional treat when with the grandparents is fine tbh. I pick my battles to maintain familial harmony.

If they are looking after your kids more often that, then you are discovering one of the downsides to accepting free childcare from family. It's very hard to tell people how they have to behave when they are the ones doing you a favour.

Yes I agree, m mums rules have massively relaxed since I was a child.
Biscuits at 9.30? No problem. Fizzy pop, drink as much as you want, best / worst one was trifle for breakfast once. I kept my teeth gritted, thankfully they’re older now and ration themselves.

bang on the money rcohle says it all really. it's getting the balance right, but surely things like bedtimes you have the final say in your own home unless dc are staying over with dm and mil ?

We recently fell out with the PIL after my MIL gave DS2 who is 6 a McDonalds and then take away pizza in one afternoon /evening.
We fell out as they felt we don't have a say in what they do when they're babysitting and we felt that was BS

I think it's pretty normal for grandparents to spoil their grandchildren and allow them to do things they didn't let their own children do.

I get this with my ILs fairly often. They don't seem to.understand that a treat is meant to be occasionally not every day!

I remember my mum getting so cross with my gran for giving endless treats. My mum now literally gives her grandchildren ANYTHING they ask for- even if it’s bloody ridiculous.
And so the cycle continues......

How often is it happening?

Pah, if you’re using them for childcare then does it really matter if they let them have treats when they’re with them? In be grand scheme of things?
If you have rules at home and these are mostly followed, then a weekly blow out with the grandparents is not a cause for strife. The kids will also have wonderful memories of all the things they got up to at granny’s!

Is it really so bad.. what’s wrong with grandparents spoiling their grandchildren 🤷🏻‍♀️.

So I take it they are looking after your kids? Then let it go. Before you know it they'll be leaving home. Pick your battles

When dd was small, I had to have a word with her step-nan about all the cakes and biscuits she was giving her. Her step-nan is diabetic so should know better. The treats were spoiling meals. We have more balance now...

It drives me mad, and it's sad because I have to limit how much time my children can spend with my mum because she just won't stop the constant stream of junk.
We eat there once per week, after dinner it will be ice cream then chocolate then ice lollies then crisps then maybe chips. Constant crap. No exaggeration, it's obsene and I'm sick of being the bad guy but she can't say no to them and often it's HER offering when they're happy NOT eating for 10 minutes. She starves herself then feeds my kids crap. Why is it ok to feed the grand kids crap when she didn't do that with her own children?!
I don't see how she doesn't get it... she'd love to have the grand kids more but can't be bloody set reasonable limits so I limit the time we spend there - so sad as they're just around the corner. Rant over- sorry!

Not using for childcare!!! One or the other is at our house every night of the week for tea! :( it is a pain and I wouldn't complain if it wasn't every night

If they only saw the DC occasionally then I'd let it go. However, they've got a bloody nerve to take a pop at your parenting rules in your own house! This really isn't normal - PIL and my DP are v different with regards to food (PIL are obese and DH was a far child till he consciously lost it as an adult, DParents are and have always been slim and keen on a healthy lifestyle although not OTT). However, both sets of GP are on board with our preferences for DS, although we do tell them they're allowed to give him more treats than we ever would because that's part of the fun of being a grandparent.

I have a constant battle with my MIL giving my child total junk (and a lot of it!)