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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to refuse to buy into the "Christmas Eve Box" fad?

342 replies

HearMeSnore · 13/11/2018 10:00

I mean, when did this shit start? I never heard of it until this year but now I keep hearing about it in every shop as if it's as essential a part of Christmas as trees and turkeys.

Fortunately it doesn't seem to have made it into DD's hearing yet but I'm dreading being asked "will I get a Christmas Eve box this year?" as if I wasn't already spending most of the Christmas budget on her actual presents.

I'm not a "bah! humbug!" person. I love Christmas. But this is just unashamed capitalist exploitation. Like when the greeting cards industry tries to introduce "secretary's day" and shit like that.

Seriously. Can we make some kind of pact to not do it? Make it die a death before it catches on and we're all pressured into buying even more crap that nobody needs?

OP posts:
Hisaishi · 13/11/2018 12:30

The whole thing being photographed to go on fb/insta is pretty cringe if you ask me, but I do kind of wonder if that stuff is dying out (or if I just blocked enough people who were doing it that they're finally all off my feed).

HauntedPencil · 13/11/2018 12:39

Does anyone remember that glorious thread where people here were taking the piss out of the netmums look at my pile Christmas thread then they all rocked up and went mad?

Much more fun than the I'm going to whittle a toy out of a stick in the garden threads.

Little kids aren't on social media giving a shit that Sandra up the road has made toast in the effigy of Santa's arse for Christmas Day breakfast, I don't get the angst just do what it is you want to do.

MinisterforCheekyFuckery · 13/11/2018 12:43

As others have said, it's nothing new. I'm 35 this year and throughout my childhood we got new PJ's and were allowed to open one present on Christmas Eve (which was usually a Christmassy book or movie) so it never occurred to me not to do the same with my own DC.

I draw the line at Elf on the Shelf though, I have enough jobs to do once the DC are in bed.

aLFIESMA · 13/11/2018 12:45

I plan to get my ( grown up ) kids to make one for me! I will leave hints and tips and see what happens . Could this take off? What would all of you ask for?

cathf · 13/11/2018 12:48

Here we go again … competitive frugality and comparative ethical Christmases.
Why can't people just give over and let others enjoy doing what they want to do, and stop presuming their traditions are Correct and others need to be shown the error of their ways?
I am not interested in reading about two-year-olds (who are not party to any peer pressure) getting a flannel, a satsuma and a donation to charity for their Christmas present. Nor am I interested in hearing about families who treasure time together above anything else at Christmas.
Just do your thing and let others do their thing. Roll your eyes and tut about the commercialism of Christmas in private, but there's really no need to parade your superior credentials and virtue signal to everyone.

ColinsVeryJolly · 13/11/2018 12:51

It just makes me sad to think of kids who have to go without yet something else in the form of a Christmas Eve box.

We grew up poor and even now reading that there were people of my age getting new pyjamas, fancy mugs, movies on the sofa ‘just because’ i feel pangs of jealousy.

I can’t imagine how it feels being that child now going without.

ReflectionsofParadise · 13/11/2018 12:51

Someone link me to the Netmums christmas pile thread please! 😂

AperolSprizting · 13/11/2018 12:51

@Birdie6 it’s definitely commercialised, I’ve seen two targeted ads for them on Instagram already today, (saw one of them a couple of times on Fri too) these were for ready made personalised boxes, one from NOTHS and one from one of these personalised gift companies!!

Cute but completely unnecessary with all the presents they’ll get the following day, nice pair of new PJ’s, a fancy hot chocolate and a Christmas film downloaded would be my limit. My lo is only 4 months tho so thankfully he’ll be more than happy just swinging off my nipples as usual 😆.

DinglyDoorDancer · 13/11/2018 12:57

It just makes me sad to think of kids who have to go without yet something else in the form of a Christmas Eve box

So everyone should miss out because some families can’t do it? Presume in that case you will be abadonning your house and passing on your Christmas dinner because not everyone is able to enjoy these luxuries?

Oblomov18 · 13/11/2018 13:01

How is a child going without? By not having a Christmas Eve box? It's a new phenomenon. And I don't like it. I'm not keen.

I don't want to give my ds's piles and piles of stuff on Christmas Eve.
I don't agree with piles and piles of stuff on Christmas Day either. I prefer one main presents and a couple/few small ones. That's my choice. I prefer it that way.

How is a child missing out? I don't agree.

Rufusthebewilderedreindeer · 13/11/2018 13:02

Not a dig at you winter its just you said it in a nice pithy way

we don't buy into the fads and just do our own thing

Sane here

But apparently something we have done for 19 years is now a fad and now we are following a fad...in a timey wimey sort of way I suppose Grin

Rufusthebewilderedreindeer · 13/11/2018 13:10

I agree with both rixera and heart

HauntedPencil · 13/11/2018 13:13

Maybe some of you need to lay off Instagram.

PennyArcade · 13/11/2018 13:35

My kids have had a Christmas eve bag since the 80's. Just a normal Christmas bag containing a pair of pj's, a drink, a chocolate orange and a Christmas book, colouring book and crayons or Christmas DVD.

It's just a way of calming them down and giving them something to do during that excited, mad hour before bed.

My youngest is now 16. She will get a pair of pj's, a bottle of J20, some chocs and nice bubble bath and shampoo. Why not?

Basically things that would have gone into their stockings on Christmas day anyway. So no more expense. A Christmas DVD or book or colouring set keeps the kids quiet for an hour or so before bedtime.

My dogs have always had a new toy and something to chew at Christmas (to keep them quiet Christmas night so I can watch the tat on TV). So shoot me.

If you don't want to do Christmas eve bags then don't. Nobody says you have to.

EmUntitled · 13/11/2018 13:38

We aren't doing a Christmas Eve box but I have bought a box. I saw some lovely handmade ones at a craft fair last year and bought it to use instead of a stocking. So she will get it on Christmas morning instead of a stocking. I thought the box was cute and easier to fill than a stocking Grin

PiperPublickOccurrences · 13/11/2018 13:40

Here we go again … competitive frugality and comparative ethical Christmases.

I don't think it's about frugality. Nobody has said that they're not doing Christmas Eve boxes because it's too much money. No-one either has mentioned giving a toddler a "flannel and a satsuma". How ridiculous.

However, there are lots of us who are totally turned off by the rampant consumer-fest which takes the Christmas name. It's not preachy to say we're literally killing the planet with our throwaway culture. Christmas-themed tat is a huge part of that. Cheap, mass produced items made in the far east, shipped around the world for us to use once or twice and then bin. For every Mumsnetter who is using the same cardboard/wooden Christmas Eve box they've had for 20 years, there's another 10 heading off to Home Bargains or Asda to get a plastic one. We need to put the brakes on and just STOP buying so much stuff.

My Christmas memories from being younger were things like fishing my dad's old rugby socks out to hang up for Santa. His rugby playing days were well over but the socks came out every Christmas. Or arguing with my brother over whether we should leave a fancy cup and saucer for Santa or the blue bowl? Nowadays parents are guilted into buying special ceramic "santa plates" which have a twee message on them like "Please leave me lots of things Santa" and cheap stockings which are poorly made.

And there IS pressure on parents - there was an "elf on the shelf" thread yesterday where several posters were getting the "But Sophie has an elf Mummy, why don't we have an elf, does Santa like Sophie more than me mummy?" Someone's "friend" even bought them an elf so that their poor, deprived children wouldn't miss out. (Although I did chuckle at the poster who got so fed up with the twatting elf that she put him in the freezer and told the kids he was homesick).

Parents are criticised from all angles and it's hard to not get sucked into the consumer stuff. We've had the head tilt and "awwww, but the kids would love a north pole breakfast / santa sack with their name on it / a mountain of plastic tat" conversations with the inlaws. If you feel your choices as a parent are being attacked, the easiest thing to do is give in and buy the sodding elf and Christmas Eve boxes.

Anyway. I've decided that the Christmas must-have is a reindeer landing mat. 6 foot by 4, illuminated in fairy lights of your choosing.Made from the cheapest, synthetic materials possible and preferably in factories staffed by Bangladeshi pre-schoolers. I'm also going to write a twee little storybook about how Rudolph can't manage sat nav and needs children to put these landing mats on their roof or in the garden so he can see where to land. Each year the mats have to be a different colour, so that you have to chuck it away and buy new each year. I'm going to be MINTED.

ProfessorMoody · 13/11/2018 13:48

Our "fad" started nearly 70 years ago when my Grandfather made a Christmas Eve box for my Mother. In it was a Christmas book, a new nightdress and a little sleigh bell. The box was passed down to me as a baby, and I always had a pair of pjs and a Christmas book as well as some sweets. When I had my son, the box was passed to him and he has Pjs, a Christmas book and a Christmas bath bomb for his Christmas eve bath.

I see absolutely nothing wrong with this. He always needs pjs at this time of year, he is an avid reader so will devour the book in hours and he has a bath. It's a lovely family tradition that spans over three generations and I won't be stopping it now, because people think it's tacky or promoting consumerism.

HairsprayBabe · 13/11/2018 13:50

I also agree with the people who have pointed out that a lot of festive activities you don't want to cram in between Christmas day and new year.

And you don't have to spend extra money

December 1st box
Christmas crafts - can be either very cheap or free - print offs and colouring pens that you already have
Free Christmas events that you can make home made tickets for
Christmas DVDs/CDs just buy once and bring them out every year
Advent calendar - home made/reusable one - or a £1 choc one

Christmas Eve
Toothbrush couple of quid
Book one you already own - free
Letter from Santa - free
PJs £5 from Primark or the super markets - if this is really a stretch then just make sure their faves are clean and folded nicely.

As for a special box - just use a Christmas gift bag, that you can then reuse for a Christmas present or wrap an empty box.

I have lived on less than £17 for food shopping a week. I know hard it can be, but other peoples traditions aren't necessarily fads or just rampant consumerism, and for me when we had no money it was more important to keep these traditions going. So it isn't nice to shit all over peoples Christmas traditions just because you don't do them your self.

And yes the shops have all jumped on the bandwagon, but that doesn't mean that people haven't been doing it for a long long time, where do you think the shops got the idea in the first place!

Cherries101 · 13/11/2018 13:52

I think it started in children’s hospitals and hospices so kids who couldn’t be at home for Christmas got to enjoy it too.

Notjustanyone · 13/11/2018 14:00

I give pj's in their stockings so they can put them on before coming downstairs to open presents and you can bet your arse they won't be getting dressed that day so at least they aren't in slept in pjs all day Grin
That elf thing looks like a hassle many parents could do without. No need for all that crap when Christmas is enough of a stress without adding to it.

cathf · 13/11/2018 14:01

However, there are lots of us who are totally turned off by the rampant consumer-fest which takes the Christmas name. It's not preachy to say we're literally killing the planet with our throwaway culture.

Really? Hmm

AdoraBell · 13/11/2018 14:03

We take pictures but we don’t use social media, so none of our photos go on fb or instagram. Now that the DC are teens they might post pics on their private instagram, but they use it to keep in touch with their friends in other countries.

CheeseAndBeans · 13/11/2018 14:05

Each to their own. We have done for the kids very year and they love it.
Always use the same box, Santa plate and Santa key. Then add new pajamas, chocolate coins, popcorn, a Christmas film, book and some Christmas coloring/crafts. Have some nice Christmas cups this year too. Mostly from the poundshop/the works so doesn't cost much.
The kids look forward to it and gives them something to do while I run about doing Christmas food prep etc!

HairsprayBabe · 13/11/2018 14:07

Regardless of whether you use social media or not we all like to take photos of our families, and most people like to look their best in photos and especially on special occasions e.g. Christmas.

That doesn't have to mean new, just clean best clothes/PJs.

Otherwise people would dress themselves and their children in practical boiler suits regardless of the event.

Drogosnextwife · 13/11/2018 14:09

I've always bought mine new jammies, a sweetie and a book for Christmas eve, that was before Christmas eve boxes come out, this year I'm adding to it I think a bath bomb some special hot chocolate and fluffy sock 😂 so I think yabu. Elf on the shelf can fuck right off though, my kids and dp make enough mess in here, don't need that little shit making more for me to clear up!

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