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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU To Say Something?

13 replies

LikeYouSaid · 12/11/2018 21:19

I have a neighbour, let’s call him B. B has started seeing a woman, let’s call her A. She has 2 DS’s from previos relationship. I don’t speak to them a lot but occasionally we exchange pleasantries and will have a bit of a natter.

I was talking to A last Wednesday when she was visiting and she mentioned how much she struggles with money and can’t keep up with her DS’s growth spurts. Luckily youngest can wear oldest DS clothes when they outgrow him but she struggles to afford clothing for eldest DS. She was quite upset about it and on the verge of tears.

I mentioned how I had some clothes that no longer fit my DS that I was intending to sell on a local selling site, but said that she could have them. A was incredibly thankful and took said clothes. This was around a week ago.

Today I noticed B had shared a post A had made on Facebook advertising some kids clothes for sale - they’re all the clothes I gave her, literally all of them and listed at high individual prices.

I know I gave them away / didn’t ask for any money but AIBU to say something when I next see her? I’m feeling pretty annoyed as I was originally going to sell them on myself but wanted to do a good deed for someone who was basically crying about not being able to clothe her child.

But I think what winds me up more is that I’m beginning to suspect I’ve been conned. I’d told B I was going through DS clothes and we joked about how quick kids grow out of things maybe a week before I spoke to A.

Maybe I’m just being paranoid... But the more I think about it the more angry I’m getting Blush

OP posts:
GreenTulips · 12/11/2018 21:21

Type under FB post

Sorry I thought I'd loaned you these? I'll take them back. Thanks

StephenQueenBooks · 12/11/2018 21:25

If you've given them away to her they're hers to do as she likes. Maybe her son doesn't like or fit into the clothes so she's selling on to buy more.

She sounds like a CF though if it was planned. Comment to her if you like and explain you were doing her a favour and not giving it her to make money.

icelolly99 · 12/11/2018 21:26

Yes, you should say something! It's not like you just gave stuff away and then a stranger has sold on; this is someone who spun you a sob story for financial gain! You could always start with commenting "those clothes your selling look familiar....."

Gizzygizmo · 12/11/2018 21:27

I would comment on the post

Nissemand · 12/11/2018 21:28

Let it be.

You gave them away. Don't judge people, you can never be sure what's motivating them.

When you are short of money, anything that raises cash counts.

Food, housing, energy bills etc. all come before clothes.

It isn't your issue anymore.

GreenTulips · 12/11/2018 21:28

I'm all for passing in stuff I've been given - it's the spirit of giving.

You don't shit on you're own door step

Thehop · 12/11/2018 21:29

“Ooh these look familiar”

Live and learn. What a cf.

Kittykat93 · 12/11/2018 21:33

That sounds really cheeky, but I don't know what I'd do! I'd probably write a comment on the post

masterandmargarita · 12/11/2018 21:33

Yep you've been had. There are cheap ways to clothe your kids. Her waterworks did the trick - C.f.!

EggysMom · 12/11/2018 21:35

I'm afraid I'd be blatant with my comment:

"You do realise that I can see these posts, you are selling clothes that I gave to you to help clothe your son. I did not give them to you to sell on. If you/he do not want them, then please give them back to me."

Pinkyyy · 12/11/2018 21:39

I'd have to say something I think, she had taken advantage of your charitable deed

MadameButterface · 12/11/2018 21:42

I’d comment with the 🤔 emoji

LikeYouSaid · 12/11/2018 21:45

I’m not A’s friend on Facebook, I saw the post only because B shared it. Her post has quite a few comments by the time I saw it otherwise I probably would comment... I think I’m going to raise the question with B first when I next see him and ask whether the clothes didn’t fit... She said they would and I asked what size he was first before I handed them over.

If I’m honest I’m more annoyed at the thought I’ve been tricked than I am at her selling them on. A few of them being listed fine, but all of them? Angry

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