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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Confused

14 replies

dragonflyflew · 11/11/2018 22:49

Having been made redundant earlier in the year, (unfairly dismissed, just reached out of court settlement), I have a new job, but struggling with the occasional unsociable hours (incorrectly advertised of course!) I'm working more than my contracted hours (it's a charity) and due to now being on minimum wage, I'm working four days a week so having to do two jobs, to make up for lower salary,

I'm exhausted, i am a single mum, have disabilities and my health has taken a massive nosedive!

But generally I really love my charity job I just can't cope with the extra evenings and weekends, there's no chance of changing them either as we've discussed it.

As I have been struggling financially I have been jobsearching and almost got a job in the civil service.
I've been offered a post but the background checks are huge, due to the high security levels of the work.
I can't hand in my notice as they say it could take six months to complete checks, plus my a family members recent criminal behaviour might scupper me. I have to declare all close relatives recent criminal behaviour.

As much as I enjoy my job I need something which is more traditional office hours, with more holiday and more pay so that I can go back to three days a week.

I feel really guilty looking at other jobs and having the civil service one possibly in hand as I've bonded really well in the charity job, they really appreciate me.

Me and my boss get on so well but I feel it's too risky to tell them I might have another job in case they let me go too.
any advice gratefully received!

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froggybiby · 11/11/2018 22:57

Don't tell them about new job. What is your notice period? 1 month? I understand you like your boss & have settled In, however you must think of your work /life balance & own interests first. Fingers x for you.

dragonflyflew · 12/11/2018 02:52

Yes, One month. Thank you froggy 😊

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Angrybird345 · 12/11/2018 06:54

Go for the civil service job! The family members criminal record may not affect you. It might if you were working with money and your sister was a convicted fraudster! Just go fir it!

gamerwidow · 12/11/2018 06:59

You don’t owe any job anything other than to do your best during working hours. They’ve already shown you they will not be flexible with you so there is no need to worry about giving them anything other than your notice period. Good luck with the civil service job.

shaggedthruahedgebackwards · 12/11/2018 07:01

Agree with Froggy

No need to mention to your current boss that you are job hunting until any new job has been properly confirmed and you are handing in your notice

I would imagine the family member's criminal activity is only likely to be an issue if you live under the same roof or perhaps if your family member has been the mastermind of a big criminal operation

dragonflyflew · 12/11/2018 10:28

Hi guys
Thank you so much for your advice. I only lost my last job due to honesty so I'm very scared nowof putting a foot wrong, I was worried about losing my job as well if I let them know I'm still looking.
Tbf my current role has never been filled for very long by any one person PLUS on my first day I was advised that my permanent contract is only as permanent as the funding for my role. We're already in deficit this year so it does leave me feeling vulnerable.
In terms of the actual job, colleagues and location I've never had better but the hours and pay don't fit.
The civil service job is going to be hardcore in terms of the subject matter but the terms and conditions will work so much better!

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brizzledrizzle · 12/11/2018 10:36

You are under no obligation to tell the charity until you hand your notice in. Keep the new job to yourself for now. I hope it all works out for you.

dragonflyflew · 12/11/2018 11:08

Thank you brizzledrizzle .

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dragonflyflew · 14/11/2018 15:17

I got the job!!!!!!!

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dragonflyflew · 14/11/2018 15:17

Now how to tell my boss?????

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dragonflyflew · 14/11/2018 15:17

Answers on a postcard please!

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knittingdad · 14/11/2018 15:21

Just tell them in a straightforward factual way.

I was in a similar position to you once and felt bad about people talking about promotion opportunities when I was waiting for security clearance for a new job - but everyone was happy for me when I was able to tell them.

They don't need to know that you've been waiting to receive security clearance.

And - congratulations!

gamerwidow · 14/11/2018 19:51

Do it in writing. Tell them how much you’ve enjoyed working there but you’ve been offered a job that better meets your circumstances and give them your notice.
If they are any sort of employer they congratulate you and work with you plan a handover.
Well done Flowers

dragonflyflew · 14/11/2018 22:28

Thank you gamerwidow 😊

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