to feel sad no one has reponded ?

[paintinmyhairAgain]

this morning i posted up a aibu re; asking my dh to talk medication for low mood / depression, and no one has responded, i feel quite sad as a result, especially when i read some of the trivial things on aibu that get answered.

Where did you post? I think some places get more traffic then others.

alfie it's on aibu and bumped twice

it says op posted on aibu.

It is a bit upsetting when no-one responds, you are right.

It's a massive forum. Some things attract a lot of responses, some don't. No reason to be sad about it.

I think people respond to trivial stuff because it doesn't take much thought. Then those with responses go in to active and attract more responses.

If something isn't in active, I won't see it- I can only respond to a few threads at any one time. I do think you are right that some things attract a huge amount of attention- that's because initially they get a response, that gets more responses and the whole thing has a life of its own.

I've posted a thread that got about three replies once and I thought it was a really good question!

How can we help you now, OP? What's the issue with your husband?

special but this is a dh / family problem i really need to share and get advice on if anyone can suggest anything that would be great.
should have put mil or parking in the title obviously

Well, stick the link in this thread and hopefully peeps will respond.

basically dh is disconnecting with family in our household through low mood and it very draining as a result, he won't see g.p although he has a history of depression [i have bipolar, so know what it can be like]. my other thread explained things better, i've bumped it again.

I read AIBU for the unreasonable posters and the intense discussions of trivial things. Sometimes I want to warn OPs off when it's obvious they're vulnerable and they post about something sensitive or important. "No, don't post here!" I think. "You'll end up feeling much worse!"
Better to be ignored than roasted.

Probably better to post it in Mental Health

Oh that's really sad. It's so hard when someone in the household is depressed as brings you all down (I take medication for depression). Your DH really needs to see gp for help - either to talk to a professional or medication. Hope you can get sorted

Would your DH consider taking St. John’s Wort which can be bought over the counter?

Yes you DH has to step up and look after his own MH, speaking from someone who themselves has to do so. If he refuses to do so then he is being selfish. I 've been in situations where people have used their poor MH to control others since they can make others feel they can pander to them and walk on eggshells. It is a miserable situation but there is only so far you can go as a spouse, partner or friend. Peoples MH is on them to maintain.

I don't know what to suggest, other than for you to know your own limits in terms of what you can and can't cope with. I couldn't live long-term with someone who was depressed, disengaged with the family and not seeking help, because I know it would drag me down and also the children. I'd have a frank chat, even if he's depressed, about how you can't go on like this.

thanks everyone for your input, sorry i couldn't do a link, not sure how to[ , pink that's a good idea, hadn't thought of that one, will give it a go.
john yes, it is selfish, i really feel like walking out at the moment, i'm going to have to kick him up the back side and say 'you are going to do something about this' thank you for your input everyone , it means a lot.

Honestly, AIBU is shit for things like that. It moves fast and has lots of new threads s everyone posts everything in the "for traffic" so things get lost.

As someone else suggested, try Mental Health as you'll get posters who have a personal interest in that topic and check it regularly.

soup thanks will get thread moved over.

Or Relationships is a good place, quite busy.

You will find lots of people in a similar situation.

I agree, your DH is being selfish in not seeking help for something that is affecting the whole family, and might be very fixable. I've been on antidepressants. I felt my family deserved to have me as much like my 'real' self as possible. Do you have children? He can never have these years back.

There you go OP:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3420437-aibu-to-ask-dh-to-get-help-with-his-low-mood-depression

I think you'll end up thanking yourself that it didn't get much response on AIBU. Its not the right place to post something sensitive and likely to cause you further upset when you inevitability and needlessly get slaughtered on there.

Hopefully you'll get a warmer and more thoughtful response in the other sub forums.

I had a DP with chronic depression and it spiked not soon after we'd moved in together (strangely coniciding with Freshers's Fair...) He dumped me in the end since he realised he didn't fancy me but he NEVER got any councelling or help for his depression. It dawned on me he was comfortable with depression, it meant no-one had any expectations of him and he could make people indulge him because o his depression.

Tbh I wouldn't put anything that needs a serious response in AIBU. You get some nasty responses so none might be better. Hope you get the help and support you need x