All girls school for non-girly girl?

[Candont]

DD has a hard time of it recently. Her bff moved away in the summer and she is not really connecting with the other girls in her class. She spends most of her lunch breaks playing football with the boys and a handful of girls who also play football. She gets on best with girls who are sporty and active or who share some of the hobbies dd is into, such as gymnastics, playing in an orchestra etc. She relates to people more through shared activities not so much through talking as opposed to ds who will not stop talking.

There is a brilliant girls school close to us. I am thinking that in a girls school she will have a much bigger pool of potential friends and that there surely will be girls who are more like her that she can gel with.

Am I being stupid to consider an all girls environment for a non-girly girl? Please excuse the stereotype I hope you get what I mean. I should add that she is super happy in her Brownies pack and gets on very well with some of the girls there.

Er my daughter is at an all girls school and just like in everyday life the girls are what they are, some girly, sporty, pagan or whatever.

As pp said. I wrnt to all girls and i've never been girly and i loved it

No you aren't stupid.

Girls who go to girls schools are more likely to do subjects/things society generally associates with males

Maybe I didn't word this very well.

I think dd finds it a little bit difficult to develop friendships with other girls and feels more at easy playing football or running around with the boys at her primary school. The girls in her class mostly stand around chatting but dd finds this boring. My hope is that if she went to an all girls high school she'd have more girls to choose from and that there would be more likely a few who she would connect with?

I am not saying that all girls at a single sex school are girly, if it read that way.

My hope is that if she went to an all girls high school she'd have more girls to choose from and that there would be more likely a few who she would connect with?

Probably, but she's unlikely to find any of the boys who she currently connects with there. So despite the larger pool of friends available because the school is larger - like all secondary schools - it's still likely to be a smaller proportion than in a mixed school due to who she currently connects with.

I'm very non-girly and went to an all girls school. Was very into sport & enjoyed school but when i went to uni i got on much better with boys. Bit of a shame went through school scared of talking to boys as i didn't have much contact with them.

How old is your daughter? You mention she is still Brownie age so younger than 10? So Y5 or Y6 if in England. Have you asked your daughter if she would have a preference of a single sex or mixed school? Why are you so worried about her preferring to hang out with the boys? Some of the most confident girls I have worked with have been those who are not bound up with following the other girls but being willing to try out a range of activities. It sounds as though your daughter does a range of activities and prefers to do rather than sit around chatting. I'd get her take on it. My gut reaction is that either may suit but she'd prefer a mixed setting.

6 miserable years at posh girls' school. I was a tomboy and there wasn't a larger pool of different types of girls. Just more of the same 'girly girls'. Even those less girly were too afraid to be themselves for fear of being isolated and teased. So it just removed me from my mostly male pool of friends.

Hell on earth!!

It was 35 years ago, so maybe modern teenagers are more confident about going against the norm. That said I'm a teacher and most teens seem to still either want to fit in with the majority or they go all out different and get into a tight-knit subculture like punk or emo.

From working in an all girls environment, I would say go for it. Our girls all run round like loons and are quite loud. Yes, there is faffing about with colours, stationery and a bit of hair styling but there is tons of sport, adventure, coding, football and general running around at break. Even those in seniors, who are supposed to be more stately, gallop about being very noisy at times (sixth form, staring at you...). I didn't notice this amongst the girls when in mixed. They just stood around talking.

I will ask her and she will most certainly say mixed school. She does get on with girls just not the ones in her class. hingsdogetbetter that sounds awful. She is a little less mature than some of the other girls in her class too, not into make up or celebrities. She is really happy at Brownies though. I was not girly either and had a shitty time at my mixed high school. The boys were super sexist and judging us by looks and being quite nasty. I am wondering if a single sex environment would let her get to know herself and develop her confidence in a slightly less gendered way. These are just some musings, happy to be told that IABU.

I went to a girls school. We didn’t really have any pressure to be ‘girly’, i can’t say that I was particularly aware that being a girl made me different to anyone. It was great. None of this period stigma or bra strap pulling Ilyou gear about happening in schools that are coed.

My daughter went to an all girls school if anything I'd say they were all less girly, possibly because there are no boys to play up to.

I think you are right OP, your daughter will have more girls to choose from as it were.
I went to an all girls school and the sports teams were very competitive and a great mix of girls.

Think at a girls school there is a deeper pool for friendships so more likely to find her tribe. My dd hung out with boys until they mixed the classes up and she now has a lovely group of female friends. She chose to spend time with the boys as the girls in her previous class were a dull bunch

We had this dilemma and felt strongly that co-Ed was the way to go. I have absolutely no regrets. My daughter has found a lovely group of girl friends but also has very easy and good platonic friendships with boys and she feels much more comfortable with them as the friendships are much simpler.

Another point is that nearly all sixth forms are now mixed. Even the Grammar schools near where I live all have mixed for Y 12 and 13 so in reality the split is only for 5 years. I liked the boys in my class at Junior school more than the girls and missed the easy platonic friendships when I went to an all girls secondary school. Putting a girl in with all other girls does not necessarily mean she will find a lot of others who are likeminded.

Does she finds it hard to make new friends, will she struggle to connect at a new school?

"She chose to spend time with the boys as the girls in her previous class were a dull bunch"
This is it for my dd since her bff left.

DD's school is single form entry, which makes it more difficult to find friends imho. Luckily she has a few good friends at Brownies. However, she is not 'girly' like the other girls in her class. She hates talking about make up or boys, which some of the girls in her class do. Some of the girls in her class are also on social media and gossip an awful leot, which dd finds boring. I am wondering if it's easier at single sex or co-ed school for a non-girly girl.

My daughter goes to a private girls school. She is a bit querky and non girly. She has been able to make more friends than at primary school. There is a good mix of girls with lots of different interests. They can be themselves and not worry about boys!

I didn't have the best experience at mixed school. I suppose I am wondering if an all girls setting would be better or worse socially for a girls who is a bit of an introvert (though not shy). She is not chatty and most often absorbed in what she is doing e.g. her instruments, sports or books.

Since her best friend (who was also a bit tom boyish) has left, she has started feeling unpopular and doesn't quite know what to make of this.
I worry that if is she moves up to high school with the same people this will just carry on. The girls school would be in a different town and also a fresh start.

My dd is non-girly and would e hated an all-girls school. When it was time to move to secondary she had no interest in single-six schools.
Her closest friends are girls but she has always got on with boys. Doesn’t really have ‘boy’ interests, it’s just her character.

I think it depends on the school and how sporty the school is and how many girls they have in her year at that school. My daughter has 195 girls in her year in her all girls school. As a school it prides itself on the girls playing sport and loads and loads of the girls are very sporty and not girly girl. But with 195 girls there are lots of girls to play sport with.

But with 195 girls there are lots of girls to play sport with. That's what my line of thinking is.