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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Partner influencing eating habits

7 replies

Toptheginup · 09/11/2018 22:26

If I am full and leave food without finishing what's on my plate he says things like 'what a waster' or 'is that all you can manage?' I'm talking a dinner plate full, sometines I just can't eat that much though, it makes me uncomfortable and bloated. To top it off, because of his bad eating habits (he's always been slim, always eaten lots and kept his washboard stomach) now he has a paunch and because he is upset and down about it decided to go on healthy eating (never fully committed but 70% effort). Now, if he sees me eating anything unhealthy he'll say little comments about it to the point I've now stopped eating snacks so much in front of him and i'll snap are you the food police? I'm miserable and feel trapped in an unhealthy cycle, we both are I think, but then the weekend arrives and we have to order food and have alcohol. when I was trying to stick to slimming world plan he would say I was boring. I lost 7lbs and felt I was going to finally shift most of the weight but now I've put it all back on. I'm a binge eater and have struggled with bullima in my youth and now I just feel so psychologically bound to food, it's my go to when I'm low or bored.
Does anyone else feel they can't make progress because of their partners influence? It's always pizzas or curry cone the weekend, I've got to take responsibility for my own actions I know, it's just so hard to lose the weight, when he's not here I don't eat as much.

OP posts:
MissionItsPossible · 09/11/2018 22:32

Does anyone else feel they can't make progress because of their partners influence?

OP, I haven’t, but I can categorically tell you that if any partner repeatedly put me down, whether they said those things whilst on their own health kick or not, would not be a partner for very long.

You don’t have to order food and have alcohol at the weekend if you don’t want to. From your post I’m thinking though that you get pressured into it. Abusive behaviour.

Neverender · 09/11/2018 22:32

I'm so sorry but you've said this:

we have to order food and have alcohol

No. No, you don't. You can do whatever you want to.

Toptheginup · 10/11/2018 04:21

I'm obviously not force fed and he doesn't force the alcohol down my neck but yes, I feel the sulky attitude and comments are abusive.

OP posts:
masterandmargarita · 10/11/2018 07:23

My partner eats more crap than me. So I guess the answer is no I am not influenced by his habits.

Shoxfordian · 10/11/2018 07:24

He's not being supportive of you
Quick way to lose 12 stone though Smile

masterandmargarita · 10/11/2018 07:27

I think you have to separate yourself mentally from him. Batch cook loads of healthy meals, freeze em, and whack em out every time he orders delivery. Smile

Thewalker75 · 10/11/2018 07:29

My partner has definitely influenced my eating habits - we used to treat ourselves regularly then he decided to go on a health kick and as a result I have naturally cut down on the crap as I don't enjoy it as much when I don't have a partner in crime to get excited about a takeaway with!

That said, if I did want a takeaway without him for example, he would never make me feel bad about it he would say crack on.

Your body, your choice. There's influencing then there's controlling.

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