Xmas bit of an issue

[user1471453601]

DD, her partner and I live together. DDs partners Mum lives 250 miles away.. We also have a much loved dog.

Last Xmas DD and her partner decided to spend Xmas with partners mum. When they got there they found Dd partners mum had fallen and broken her hip. She is a 92year old lady, I'm much younger, 68. They all spent most of Xmas at the hospital with Mum.
This year I said that I know they didn't have the kind of Xmas they wanted with partners Mum, so maybe they should go again this Xmas and try to have the kind of Xmas they would all like. They agr eed. So far so good.

DDs partner is one of nine. DD is an only.

I have little problems being on my own, what I do have problems with is people feeling sorry for me. My sister, my best friend, my cleaner, my DDs friend insisted I must come to them for Xmas lunch. I really really didn't want to do this. I'm deaf and being with people who don't understand my disability is so difficult.

Now I've upset my DD. I asked what they wanted to do about our dear dog at xmas. If they take her with them, I will slope off some where abroad and thoroughly enjoy myself. If they cannot take her I'll stay and look after her and have a nice meal and be fine.

What I can not.do is feel that these people feel so sorry for me that they feel the need to take me in. Oh, the embarrassment☺. I don't need "taking In".

Having read this back I realuae, I just cannot handle pity. Oh Lord, I just wish Xmas would go away

I hate people 363 days of the year, I am one of those who MN doesn't believe exist in rl that won't answer the door even when in full view. However for some odd reason at Halloween and Christmas I go full on Irish Mammy and decide to feed the entire nation so no probably they are genuine invitations. Would you like to come here we are having a medieval style banquet?

You say you have little problem being on your own, OP, but the fact that you got teary when talking about it, and that you've pointed out that your daughter's partner is one of nine makes me wonder whether that's really true? I think if you're upset at the thought of spending Christmas alone, it's OK to say so.

Is there any chance you'd go with your daughter and partner to the partner's mother? If the partner's one of nine and they're all going to be there surely they could squeeze another one (and dog) in!

@Bluelady....I always say to others... love the festive period but don't care about Christmas day. Too much pressure and chocolate box perfection. Prefer the 8n between times when people are more relaxed and tend to do what they want rather than what they think they need to. I will be spending Christmas alone next year and am.planning a Caribbean cruise !!

I reckon, just by reading how much you think of your dog. How you love it too much to put it in kennels. And how unselfish you've been with your daughter and her partner saying they should go to his mums, after what happened last year, that you are a caring and thoughtful person. And this is probably why all these people have invited you for Christmas. Not out of pity, but out of a genuine desire to spend time with you on a special day.