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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think DP might come home

32 replies

EddSimcox · 08/11/2018 17:33

Fell over in the street, literally flat on my face (as evidenced by broken glasses). Nothing broken this time (just out of a cast for broken ankle this week). Feeling bruised sore and a bit shaken but clearly not dying. Eventually get DP on the phone, at the end of call she says "just going out for a drink with X". Reasonable for me to be upset or ridiculous?

OP posts:
Butterymuffin · 08/11/2018 17:35

Was she properly sympathetic in the call?

BaldricksTrousers · 08/11/2018 17:35

Did DP express sympathy? TBH I wouldn't cancel my plans if my DP fell over and wasn't injured.

Upslidedown · 08/11/2018 17:36

I wouldn't cancel my plans if DH fell over nor would I expect him to cancel his.

Theyprobablywill · 08/11/2018 17:37

To come home to do what?

MrsTerryPratcett · 08/11/2018 17:38

Feeling bruised sore and a bit shaken but clearly not dying.

It's a judgement call. If it was my DH, I would have asked, or he would have asked.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 08/11/2018 17:40

Sorry you fell over OP but I'm not sure what your DP could actually do for you.

TrippingTheVelvet · 08/11/2018 17:40

I would not be impressed if I was expected to cancel on a friend because DW fell over. Someone more cynical might think they were looking for an excuse for DP to not go out.

Original poster
EddSimcox · 08/11/2018 17:40

To do what? give me a hug. Yes she was properly sympathetic on the phone. I guess it's just me. Everything is a bit fragile between us so I overreacted I suppose.

OP posts:
yorkshirepud44 · 08/11/2018 17:41

Not quite sure why you need her to drop everything for this. You sound a bit of a liability tbh.

Original poster
EddSimcox · 08/11/2018 17:42

Does it make a difference that I didn't know about the drink before and was expecting her home?

OP posts:
Bestseller · 08/11/2018 17:42

It depends if its a pop out for a drink on the way home or a planned night out with friends who rarely meet up.

My DH goes out about four time a year, I wouldn't want him to miss out. If it was four times a week I might see it differently

MrsTerryPratcett · 08/11/2018 17:43

Everything is a bit fragile between us so I overreacted I suppose.

Any of the fragility linked to control or neediness on your part?

Sorry you fell over BTW. If DH came home every time I fell over he'd never leave #clumsy Flowers

UnderaRock · 08/11/2018 17:44

If you were expecting your DP home already I would be a bit put out especially if you'd prepared things for dinner already and such yes. That's more a common courtesy thing.

But just because you fell not unless you have some medical condition. Like if you had a seizure and fell yes. Or if you tipped over your wheelchair backwards and fell yes. But just walking and tripped I wouldn't really expect them to come home.

Original poster
EddSimcox · 08/11/2018 17:44

A liability? that's kind

Not looking for an excuse to stop DP going out, fine with that generally (though I guess I do prefer to know in advance)

OP posts:
Poisongirl81 · 08/11/2018 17:45

You are being ott. My oh is unwell but still tells me to go out because he's a grown man!

TrippingTheVelvet · 08/11/2018 17:45

It would make me less suspicious of your intentions but I still wouldn't cancel for something so minor. I get how it's easier to read into things if you're not in great form though.

TowerRavenSeven · 08/11/2018 17:45

YABU, sorry - if you had to go to hospital then yes but if not? It's not like they can do anything really.

Bluntness100 · 08/11/2018 17:47

Seriously you want her to cancel her night out because you fell Over?

That's not ok op. It's needy and controlling.

UnderaRock · 08/11/2018 17:49

I'm confused about the wording of the OP which is why I'm asking about a health issue. Did you trip on something or do you have a disorder which causes falling? Because that definitely would change I think a lot of people's answers here

Racecardriver · 08/11/2018 17:55

Not unless you are of an age for a fall to be dangerous.

KatKit16 · 08/11/2018 17:55

@EddSimcox you sound a bit accident prone? Is she used to you falling over & is thinking FFS what's he's done now ? Lol. Joking aside...I think it's reasonable to expect her to come home & see you. Did you ask her to ?

ThistleAmore · 08/11/2018 17:58

I'd ascertain that OH wasn't actually 'hurt' hurt (as opposed to feeling a bit sorry for himself), make the appropriate 'aaaw' noises, then crack on and tell him to give me a bell if he needed anything when I was on my way home.

He's an adult, he fell over. What am I supposed to do, kiss it better?

Also, my poor OH would never get to leave the house if he had to cancel plans every time I fell over. #veryclumsy

xJessica · 08/11/2018 18:01

Some people are being rather harsh here! I would definitely have gone home if it was my DH. Even though you weren't seriously hurt OP, you must be pretty shaken, anything like that is a shock to the system. Are you OK?

Shitonthebloodything · 08/11/2018 18:02

I don't think I'd even think to come home if my OH fell over. I'd be sympathetic, there there and all that then we'd just laugh about it and get on with our day. I wouldn't expect him to come home for me either. Is there any reason a fall would be particularly dangerous or upsetting for you?

ShalomJackie · 08/11/2018 18:04

Did you actually tell her how shaken up you felt or expect her just to realise without verbalising it properly? It may just be one of those cases where she hasn't realised exactly how bad you are feeling and has gone merrily off out with her friend without even realising.