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AIBU?

Is this weird or have I missed something? (Pos trigger domestic abuse)

5 replies

Spilledmycoffee · 07/11/2018 13:25

This has popped up on my Facebook. It seems to be domestic abuse counselling aimed at helping the abuser learn to play nicely instead of helping the victim get away?

What must that be like? "I hit my girlfriend last night." "Ohh well, one day at a time. Just try not to hit her tonight"? Confused

Is this weird or have I missed something? (Pos trigger domestic abuse)
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FredFlinstoneMadeOfBones · 07/11/2018 13:33

I would always without question advise a victim of domestic abuse to escape, not wait around in the hope their abuser gets help. HOWEVER programs that work with abusers are fairly obviously a good idea. An abuser is likely to find a new partner and repeat their behaviour so it's vital that where possible they address their behaviour and the underlying causes. (Quite often an abuser will have grown up in a home where abuse is normal for example, others have other issues).

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Spilledmycoffee · 07/11/2018 14:02

I agree there should be programs aimed at working with abusers. The thing I found odd was how it's aimed at people currently 'in an abuse relationship'

I can imagine my ex using this as an excuse to make me stay because look at how hard he's trying and how much help he's willing to get

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user1473878824 · 07/11/2018 20:29

I may be COMPLETELY wrong here but aren’t these sometimes court sanctioned especially when women won’t leave?

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user1473878824 · 07/11/2018 20:30

Ah this was it, something I randomly clicked on recently: www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-45751016

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Nicknacky · 07/11/2018 20:33

I can’t see why working with an abuser to improve his behaviour is a bad thing? But hopefully his victim has left him.

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