To think some people just have bad luck when it comes to health problems?

[NooNooHead]

I’m sorry if this is brief - I am feeling knackered and am going to bed soon.

I have had my fair share of horrid health problems over the past few years, and have had to get through a mild traumatic brain injury and post concussion syndrome, mental breakdown, drug induced involuntary movement disorder, anxiety, ectopic pregnancy, and - most recently - the possibility that I may have a genetic disorder called mitochondrial disease (although this is to be confirmed through future testing).

Sorry if I sound like I am whinging but it does seem highly unfair that some people are born healthy and throw their good health away, yet others are born in poor health (I was born 3 months premature and nearly died, was weaned off heroin and am pretty lucky to be alive), and have a lot of their life struggling.

I’m sure someone will come on here and say ‘be grateful, mindful, practise gratitude etc’, of which I do every day. Yet, occasionally I wish
I could get another shot at life without the complications and health worries.

I guess in some ways it makes me more resilient, happy to be alive and grateful for the little things.

I do love life, really.,. Just feeling a bit emotional and down tonight.

I work in healthcare and have huge sympathy for you. It is a lottery - yes, some people throw their good health away but others are just plain unlucky. Yesterday I saw a lady who had survived breast cancer but had had a massive stroke which will leave her very disabled and struggling. Completely unfair. YANBU.

Thank you PurpleWithRed for your kind reply. It is sad to see others struggling who deserve some respite and relief, but I guess the reality is that life isn’t like that.

I am not trying to have a ‘victim’ mentality, just because I have had these things happen to me. I’m just venting a bit, then pulling my big girl’s pants on for another day.

You have my sympathies OP. Some people are very lucky with their health.
I have a bone condition I've had since I was about 10. I've had numerous corrective surgeries. I also had a really tough pregnancy and ended up with a section.
There are some days I get quite down about it tbh. I have a lot of scars which make me very self conscious. I do try look at the positives in life but I also wish I was "normal".

Sorry to hear about your health Badwifey - it sounds like you are a very strong person, and you have my sympathy too. Best wishes to you

Yes. Iv got MND and looked after myself always very fit running cycling etc. Now I walk with a stick. Speech problems. Pisses me off when I see people who don't look after themselves. I know it will catch up with them in the end but I'm young and all the plans I had are out the window.

You're right. It's definitely so unfair for those who are so unlucky with ill health.

mrsjackrussell I am so sorry to hear you have MND... neurological conditions really suck, you have my utmost sympathy (as I have had a TBI and movement disorder, but these are nothing really compared to MND)

Best wishes and to you too.

Yes agree. Was a carer for a woman who had a massive stroke and was permanently disabled in her 30's. The cause was the contraceptive pill. It was a known side effect, but extremely rare. She was massively unlucky.

I agree OP, and sympathise. You have had bad luck. It seems like maybe the circumstances of your birth may be having repercussions now?

Some people are definitely luckier with their health than others, at least earlier in life. Some of them appear to smugly congratulate themselves on having 'achieved' this because of their lifestyle choices, and seem short on empathy for/judgemental of those who suffer, seemingly never seeing that there are people who are similarly virtuous, who are nonetheless dealt a bad hand with their health.

I have noticed, though, that a proportion of the smug healthies do not cope well mentally if struck down with illness/disability in later life. While I'm sure it is absolutely no consolation, you sound very resilient. Nevertheless it is natural to feel angry and sad about it at times. Don't ever beat yourself up for it.

Noonoo it's OK as iv got the best form of it. It can't kill me like ALS.
Sorry to hear you are going through stuff too. You can't compare. Everyone has their own things to cope with. Doesn't mean to say it's any worse or better.

I think most of us would like another shot at life without some hindrance or other!

It is luck. Other people are unlucky in other ways.

As for some throwing away good health usually things like smoking or drinking etc are reactions to some adversity or other, just maybe not something obvious.

I completely sympathise as you can only control your health through lifestyle choices to a certain extent, and that percentage will be different for everybody - it's just down to their genes.

For example, you hear of centenarianies who routinely smoke and drink and have done all their lives, but they must just have amazingly good genes, yet people who don't smoke, drink and aren't obese and who live perfectly healthy lifestyles can be struck with cancer because it runs in their family.

Totally unfair.

You could say those who die either extremely late or extremely early either have incredibly good or bad genes, and that everyone else is somewhere in the middle.

My mother, however, probably had bad genes as she got type diabeties aged 17 and cancer runs in the family. She died aged 56 from lung cancer but also smoked too. So an early death through smoking and bad genes was most liklely assured.

ShovingLeopard yes, I think you are right - the circumstances of my birth and the choices that my birth mum made, combined with my genetics, are all having repercussions now. I’m only 37 yet sometimes I feel like I have had enough health issues for someone twice my age!

I loved your reply, very thoughtful. I think it is true about ‘smug’ healthy people finding it tough later in life when something massive gets them. I’m pretty resilient, yes, but I don’t relish old age bringing me any more health problems to be honest, I think I’m going to be honest and say it would probably break me - and I would look in favour of things like euthanasia etc.

My poor dear departed DB had bowel cancer, and a lot of his health problems were self inflicted- but (and this sounds callous), I would have swapped places with him and had a healthy life from birth than be beset with issues like I am in my life now. It was such a waste.

I’m sure it will all be ok. Thank you for all your replies - they have cheeed me up and given me some perspective.

Yep. Depression, anxiety, cholinergic urticaria, hidradenitis supprativa, autoimmune neutropenia and cauda equina
My doctor says I like the rare conditions that are tricky to spell! If I didn't laugh I would cry

Health is the ultimate lottery. Even if people have caused the illness. It's a lottery about if it kills you or not.

My fil, for example, died because he drank too much. After his diagnosis, he continues to drink and sped up his death. He died aged 50. He wasn't ever drunk but drank steadily every evening and all weekend for years. My grandad on the other hand was a drunk his whole life, always pissed. Was told at 46 he would die if he didn't stop. He died aged 80. Why did he get away with drinking for so long and fil didn't.

Touch wood me, my brother and our kids have been ok. No long term illnesses. However my cousins all have at least one child with a serious illness. Either born or developed later. All related to their genes. I have 2 cousins with CF.

But then I nearly died and still live with consquences of contracting meningitis at 17.

There are so many things that impact our health and/or how our body deals with it and there isn't anything we can do about those things. Sometimes, there are things others could have done, such as our mothers when we were in the womb. But then we don't know what it would be like if those things were different. Would we be healthier, would we still have the same problems, would we have different health problems? We don't know if that would have made things better, maybe just different.

I dont understand wat r u suffering through but and wont google it as it gives me anxiety.... mine condition is also smwat same i m suffering through ulcerative colitis which is type of autoimmune disease from 3 years.....it took my normal life from me....i accepted it and started new life with good eating habits and daily exercise i did gym for 2 years gained 20 kg weight from 40 to 59. i got covid and got recovery soon but after 2 months my joints started behaving abnormally they produced popping crackling sound ...my collarbone geta popped out, my jaw feel stucked when i open my mouth..... dr said its natural and should ignore it!!!......i mean what the heck is happening with my body.....it feels like hell men .......if anybody asks wats happening with u i cant even answer their questions properly ......patients like bp asthama, diabetes can just tell that ther r suffering from bla bla....but wat about me......everyday i think some miracle will happen and my body will be restored.....everyday i think death is better than eternal suffering.......i just google and got to ur articlee......hope some miracle happen in our life and we can focus on our career like others....i m 20yearsof age

It's shit. But it's hardly your fault, is it? So might as well get on with things, as you can't make them disappear if you dwell on the unfairness of a genetic lottery.

I'd rather not have my diagnoses. But that doesn't change the fact I've got them. And at least I make bloody sure I don't waste the good days because I have no idea when I might wake up one morning to find there aren't going to be any good days ever again.

FFS. Zombie.

Yes, I have had two different cancers, at youngish age and not expected to survive either, and now Type 2 diabetes all related to bad genes. I knew about the risks and did everything I could to avoid these diseases so definitely bad luck. However, a combination of brilliant Drs and good luck means that at age 70 I am still alive and kicking.

Problem is even after taking good care of my health(ate tasteless healthy food… daily exercise meditation,etc) i m suffering from from different unexplainable disease/disorders or whatever is it........i dont think doctors have perfectly diagnosed my joint issue caz it seems very abnormal to me.....when i move any joint it feels sth is sticking between them at some points my body parts feela like shivering .......my friends keep asking me,i cant even explain it to them ......they just mock me "he goes to gym still he is skinny" ....my good friend also looks down on me ....y men....i cry literally everyday not only me my family health conditions are also not well...one after another keeps popping....i always think y i m the one .... motivational videos and all other stuff seems bullshit to me..... whenever i start new sth new pops with my body......mental pain >>>>>>>>>

I also do whatever i like everyday caz i dont think i can live with such miserable life but on other hand i have to study hard for earnings too as jobs are hard to get in India
It was damn hard to accept ulcerative colitis
For person like me and now condition is going out of my handling limit.....i m just
Death >>>>>miserable life