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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think if you don’t like dogs, don’t walk this route?

617 replies

YippeeKayakOtherBuckets · 06/11/2018 08:52

I’ve just been told off, aggressively, for having my dogs off lead.

We walk to school down a woodland path that is used by literally dozens of dog walkers, I counted fifteen other dog owners just on this walk, the vast majority off lead. There is nowhere on the length of the path that can’t be easily reached by a faster route, the path runs a winding way alongside a quiet road with a wide path.

Anyway, dogs, joggers and the odd cyclist all usually use the route along with pedestrians and it’s generally accepted that you’ll meet several dogs on the way. This woman, who I’ve not seen before, got right in my face and said ‘put your dogs on a lead, I don’t like dogs’.

I’m terrible at confrontation so just apologised and moved on.

But it’s really rattled me. Am I being unreasonable? One of mine is a bouncy 4month old lab, he’s well trained and doesn’t approach people or dogs unless I let him, but he is, as I say, bouncy and large so that might be why she picked on me and not the other dozen people she must have passed.

If I see her again (and have the nerve) wibu to suggest that she walks the other way round?

OP posts:
anniehm · 07/11/2018 20:32

Very annoying isn't it. It's happened a few times despite my dog not approaching them at all. There's people campaigning in this city to get dogs banned from parks despite the fact for 9 months of the year we are the only people using them (today I saw 4 or 5 other people all had dogs). Yes as dog owners we need to ensure they don't annoy people but others need to also share the space - we all pay taxes!

Ruffina · 07/11/2018 20:39

There's people campaigning in this city to get dogs banned from parks despite the fact for 9 months of the year we are the only people using them (today I saw 4 or 5 other people all had dogs).

Maybe the campaigners are sick of dog shit in the parks and don’t go there because of that?

clarkl2 · 07/11/2018 20:43

It's a PUBLIC path...... As a dog owner, for the safety of your animal, it should be on a lead in public places. I have a dog and wouldn't dream of letting off lead on the school run. He gets a fright, bolts, it's a frightened, lost or worst case scenario dead dog.

Original poster
YippeeKayakOtherBuckets · 07/11/2018 20:55

I did say this upthread but just for those at the back, it’s not peak school run times, it’s 7.30 o; the way to breakfast club. Pretty much entirely dog walkers and people on their way to the bus stop (which is reached easier by the road which has a wide footpath).

When we do walk it at school times there are the same three families who all know us anyway (two with dogs). It’s really not high traffic for anyone who isn’t with a dog. It’s quite out of the way and the long way round.

OP posts:
user1467536289 · 07/11/2018 20:59

DaysofWineandNeurosis
We live near a similar facility - very well known by dog owners and indeed, dog walkers! Most of the dogs are allowed off lead here - they are (usually) very friendly and interested in each other - with the occasional mis-appropriation of another dog's ball or toy ;-)
It is well known that the common is used by dog walkers and horse riders - but also model aeroplane fliers!!
Other visitors do visit for walks - some strenuous - but the dogs are never treated as badly as you have described. We also have a Lab by the way - who is now 26 months - but no quieter than when he was 4 months! He loves every person and every other dog!! So sad that people who are unable to live and let live are hell bent on infiltrating other people's spaces where folk are happy to tolerate and make allowances for the newbies!

Original poster
YippeeKayakOtherBuckets · 07/11/2018 21:05

Requisite diagram btw. Red path, green woodland, purple road and footpath.

To think if you don’t like dogs, don’t walk this route?
OP posts:
user1467536289 · 07/11/2018 21:07

I agree with all the other MN posters having read this thread more closely. You are on a loser.

Your dogs are lovely, love them in private - the public have no reason to love them - however friendly or gorgeous you think they are!!

user1467536289 · 07/11/2018 21:13

Ruffina
That is below the belt - where we live there are ample facilities to dispose of dog waste - and they are regularly emptied. We quite often see nappies left in the fenced off play area of our village green park - but that doesn't count as "offensive" surely - it's human waste after all!! It has a right to be left There does it?

KittyMcV · 07/11/2018 21:16

I wrote a long post earlier supporting the need for dogs to be able to be exercised off the lead, but I must admit - reading through these posts I'm shocked at the number of people who seem to think it's OK for your dogs to approach other people. Surely you can't honestly think it's OK for any dog, particularly large ones, to approach children or other people? I think the OP sounds like her dog was under control, but just being lively. It's a completely different matter if a dog approaches people, especially children. For goodness sake, get a grip. I am an (off lead) dog owner and I would NEVER let my dog do that. If a child is frightened and hits out at a dog, there are some dogs who would react, even out of fear. And even regardless of that YOU might know your dog is harmless, but other people don't. Come on fellow dog owners... don't let the side down. Get your dogs trained to stay away from others, then nobody needs to go for a walk in fear.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 07/11/2018 21:21

stinking, disease ridden dogshit
swinging bags of shit-balls...little black shit-sacks

strewn across all the lovely outdoor places

because nobody ever leaves soiled nappies or sanitary wear strewn in beauty spots, oh no.

jasjas1973 · 07/11/2018 21:33

Whataboutery at its best!

If you ve not seen the amount of dog shit left on/in Parks, paths, fields and woodland areas, then you are blind and part of the problem.

Last year our local National Trust property spend £7,000 cleaning up dog shit from their grounds, a lot left in bags tied to trees - i'm very good friends with one of the estate managers there.

90% of the issues between dog owners and other members of the public would be solved if dog owners took responsibility for the mess produced.

JuliaJaynes9 · 07/11/2018 21:33

we all pay taxes
Dogs don't pay taxes

SchadenfreudePersonified · 07/11/2018 21:35

I feel so sorry for postmen and -women. There’s a poster up in my local sorting office explaining the horrendous number of dog attacks and bites that posties suffer.

I agree that it is awful - but dogs in their homes are a different matter entirely. It is their territory and they are guarding. That said, most people have more sense than to let their dog bite the postman, but the postperson's jobs brings them into contact with more dogs than usual in situations where they are guarding their families (from their perspective). That is how they are more likely to be bitten. It isn't fair, it isn't acceptable, but it's natural and will happen if people don't ensure that their letterboxes aren't covered if they have a territorial dog.

JuliaJaynes9 · 07/11/2018 21:36

if dog owners took responsibility for the mess produced
Why do dog owners train their dogs to defecate in public places why can't they shit at home?

jasjas1973 · 07/11/2018 21:39

@SchadenfreudePersonified

I can see dogs and their owners can do no wrong in your eyes, typical of the entitled irresponsible owner who things everyone else has to fit in and around their life style and that of their dogs.

dwab45 · 07/11/2018 21:43

If she approaches you again tell her to fuck off.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 07/11/2018 21:44

On the contrary jasjas- there are many rubbish dog owners around - but there are a lot of good ones, too.

And dogs are not the dirtiest animal on the planet as you seem to think - people are. It's people who fly tip. dump broken glass in children's playgrounds, and it's people who don;'t clean up after their dogs.
There are some people - often quite well-off and educated people at the, and as long as they have holes in their noses they won' pick up after their dogs, because hey are too good for that.

But it's not the fault of the dogs, and it isn't the fault of the responsible owners either.

CardsforKittens · 07/11/2018 22:18

I think it would be useful to have some park spaces specifically for dogs, and other spaces that are dog-free. It wouldn't solve all the difficulties, but at least there would be places where parents could take their kids without worrying about dogs jumping, or dog shit all over the grass. And other places where dog owners know they won't get scolded for letting their pets run around energetically. Obviously most spaces would still be shared but it would be quite nice to have options.

I don't hate dogs. I have friends with very sweet dogs. I like those dogs. But I don't enjoy being around unknown dogs in public places because they can be unpredictable. I'm not scared of them but I find it very annoying when they jump up on me and get mud on my clothes or scratch me. I would like it if there were a few places I could go for a walk without encountering them.

Melissa74 · 07/11/2018 22:26

@smithsally884 Why does it ? OP clearly states her dog did not interfere with this lady . Why does a persons irrational fear top her right to walk her well behaved dog on a popular dog walking space ?

Tinklewinkle · 07/11/2018 22:28

I think it would be useful to have some park spaces specifically for dogs

When my dog was a puppy we used a private enclosed field (owned by a friend) a few times a week so we could let him off lead and work on his recall

We still got several people demanding we put him on his lead. It didn’t seem to matter that they were trespassing. Can’t win really sometimes

Diamondsandjems · 07/11/2018 22:35

Aw please help me train my puppy to come when called OP. I have a little terror, not at all a doddle to train 🙈.

jasjas1973 · 07/11/2018 22:36

@SchadenfreudePersonified

That is obvious! we cannot complain about dogs as they don't read or understand!

Once out in the countryside the vast majority of owners do not pick up their dogs mess, how can they? dog is off the lead and the mess would be hard to find even if the owner was inclined to clean it up - but its still a huge problem for the land owner, their livestock and workers who work the land etc and thats excluding all the crap deliberately left on a path!
In town, i agree, most owners clean up after fido.

Dog ownership has grown massively over the years and in many ways that's a good thing but owners need to take more responsibility both for themselves and their dogs - before the Government intervenes with more bans, licences and muzzles, which is inevitable.

JuliaJaynes9 · 07/11/2018 23:05

One factor involved in the increase in dogs off leads is that it gives the owners a cover for not dealing with the shit, they just conveniently dont notice that their dog has done it

JuliaJaynes9 · 07/11/2018 23:06

the Government intervenes with more bans, licences and muzzles, which is inevitable
the sooner the better

CherryPavlova · 07/11/2018 23:10

One of the big estates locally actively discouraged the bagging of dog faeces and has signs telling people to flick it into undergrowth. Their belief is plastic is more damaging than pooh.
Big dogs need time off lead to get the exercise they need. I’m not sure you can generalise about mess.