Waiting until people go to have the heating on?

[HannahHut]

Bit of a weird one. My housemates are going on holiday for a week and they over heard me telling my mate I'm going to put £20 on the meter and have the heating/fire on as much as I like (I'm freezing).

One of my housemates said it's selfish for me to wait until they're away to pay for the heating.

Basically, they never put the heating on because they don't want to pay to put gas in the meter. But if I put money in the meter they'll use it even when I'm not there, as a result I stopped doing it.

Aibu to put money in the meter and have the heating on as much as I want when they're away to treat myself?

...they are being ridiculous and are shitty friends. Using the electric YOU paid for, for heating, when you were out and they refuse to chip in is low. Very low. Refusing to pay for any heating all over winter is a bit rubbish, but I know it’s quite common in a lot of house shares.

I’m surprised you didn’t say ‘Selfish? Me? Last time I put money on the meter for heating you didn’t only benefit when I chose to put it on, you helped yourself to it when I was home AND used it when I was out. You don’t want to contribute to hearing at all, can you explain why you think I should pay for it, for you?’

I’d be looking for a new house share and discussing heating and bills before even going to look at a place.

Is your gas not also used for hot water?

You really need to have a kitty that it's topped up out of, so it's not any particular persons money in there at any one time.

But in the current situation, YANBU.

They are being ridiculous and you definitely need to find a new flat / flatmates asap.

Tempting to Air BnB their room(s) while they're away, but prolly illegal and bound to be more trouble than it's worth. Still, an individual heater - oil or gas - is a good idea until you can move.

No, hot water isn't gas because when the electric goes, that goes too.

To be honest I'm not sure how it works, I know we have an electric key and a gas card and they need to be topped up separately.

I think if they weren't a couple life would be a bit easier as she can't disagree with him without him taking it personally and vice versa. So any house issues become me Vs them.

I might have a sit down with them tonight and have a talk about putting the heating on over winter and what would be a reasonable amount to pay each.

What you spend your money on is not their business surely?

Just get an electric fan heater and have it on in your room - they have thermostats so turn off when it warms up. i have one in the office and it takes just a couple of minutes until it is warm enough in there [office is a garden room in the garden]...

And hopefully you will have enough saved to get your own place soon.

I wouldn’t get a gas heater. Too much faff & they smell horrible.

This type is good...

However, you’re back to sharing the cost again or paying the extra yourself if they refuse and how much of the bill is down to heating and them using it when you’re out is just begging for more arguing.

I think I’d just stick to warm socks, hot water bottle and house share hunting!

It sounds as if you need to spell it out for them:

“You refuse to pay towards the power bill for the heating, and I cannot and will not pay for your heating. If you want the heating on, you have to pay your fair share.”

If they never contribute to gas meter, it’s a bit off for them to switch the heating on. Sounds like you definitely need to have a chat about what is reasonable in terms of how long it’s on for and how much you all contribute. No one likes to overhear themselves being talked about, but it’s a good way to start the chat, that you feel it’s unfair for them not to pay for heating you’re all benefitting from.

When are they going on holiday? IF it’s soon I’d wait to ‘have the chat’ until they get back and they're freezing!

...but he sounds like a twat and I’d want to move anyway. Sharing with a couple, especially when its only you them, is pretty crap.

Is the rent not divided by 3? They sound like a pair of c.f. If you sit down with them tonight, please see how much you have paid in standing charges and actual heating. Divide by 3 and insist they pay their share

Mean miserable bastards they are. I'd look for a new houseshare if I were you.

Is this the first winter living with them? Once the cold properly sets in, how do they propose drying washing and stopping everything feeling damp? They will have to be properly tight to want to live in a damp cold home.
I know you said you are saving for your own place, but I’d be looking for somewhere else to live and giving this place notice. You shouldn’t be living somewhere like that, it will make you ill.

Our sitting room has no radiator or gas fire so is freezing in winter. We have used halogen heaters in there, but even two of them were inadequate (large room, high ceiling, old house many draughts). We saw an oil filled radiator in Lidl for 40 quid which seemed a reasonable price, so got it. The room has never been so cosy! It's lovely.

Is the heating on the electric meter?

If so when the electric meter runs out does the cooker and hot water stop as well?

Do they not top up when that happens?

Who tops up then?

You need a pot where everyone contributes to the electric meter equally for the month.

I would be looking for another house share to be honest they sound like they’re saving money off you paying the utility bill.

Electric and gas should be shared equally 3 ways. So each time the meter runs out you each put £5-£10 into topping up. If they don't agree find new flatmates as they are being cf's.

Or if he is not using his room how do you feel about getting in a 4th room mate and then can get a slight reduction in their individual rents (not utilities), then they can afford the bills and you don't feel like a gooseberry!

Everything is on the electric except the heating which is gas.

We pay the rent in thirds and the electricity too.

I've not lived with them before, we moved in in July and they got together a week before so it was too late to pull out of the plan.

Text them both asking for a house meeting about the heating but heard nothing yet.

I get an electric oil filled heater for your room. Will keep your room toasty, plugs in the mains and doesn’t actually use loads of electricity. We had them, ours also had timers on them and I’d set them to come on during the night and early morning so the room stayed warm.

But I’d be looking for another house share too.

Something like this

Some of the gas charge will be a standing charge - whether used or not. That should be split three ways if they ever want to use the gas or most of your top up will be swallowed by that.

Unless you’re on a tarriff with no standing charge? I think mine is about 30p a day?

We had these in a house with no heating.

www.calor.co.uk/campingaz-radiant-portable-heater.html

£85 plus the price of a gas bottle - which you could pick up free or v.cheap on FB/Ebay.

I don’t remember them smelling that badly and that was 20 years ago.

The water could be heated by the gas, but the boiler will need electricity to work, which is why it goes off when the electricity goes off.

Separately from this, it really is worth your while finding out how water is heated and how the heating works in any place you live, it’s basic life skills that help you make good decisions on where you spend your money. We can help here identifying any bits and pieces if you post pictures.

I don't think it's on to suggest OP gets an electric heater for her own room. Cos she's then using more than her share of electricity costs. i mean if they did the same, then you'd hope they would pay more into the bill rather than expecting it to still be divided 3-ways?

Really got to come to some kind of agreement.

Lol I'd say...."I completely agree, so I'll not turn the heating on while you're gone. (Hopefully they'll hear how ridiculous it sounds.) But we need to chat about winter heating."

Then have an electric fan heater in my room (£10-15 for a small one). Run it the whole time theyre away
You'll be the one topping up the electric meter so you can do as you please with your money you load into it.

you better pray for a mild winter

seriously im with you op you need to sort this out

Standing charge is included in rent according to the tenancy agreement.

I know it's terrible I don't know much about it but I've just moved in from out of uni so I know how to top it up and how to reset a tripped boiler but that's about it 😁

I can't have an electric heater in my room because I'd be using the electric more than I pay so I'd be as bad as them.

Had a text from A who said he they'll be getting ready for holiday so busy he'll see if they've got time. (I texted them both, I treat them as separate people even though they act like they're one person).