AIBU?
I have an irrational fear driving me nuts
Unicornandbows · 04/11/2018 10:18
I don't know if it's because I am pregnant or what but I am scared of my dog being kidnapped I've already delayed the walk for an hour in hope my husband can come with me. (live in rough area - nothing happened to me personally)
I don't know where its come from or why I feel this fear? About 7 months ago it was a fear of someone breaking in to the house as our back window was broken but no one took anything. I ended up purchasing a new door and looking for security cameras and went ott
I know I am being unreasonable but what can I do to stop this crazyness
ScreamingValenta · 04/11/2018 12:25
Sorry to hear you are feeling so low. Have you spoken to your GP? If your anxiety is getting to a stage where it's affecting your ability to leave the house, it might be that you would benefit from counselling (or medication if there is something you can safely take while pregnant).
What kind of dog do you have? Are there practical measures you can take in the meantime, such as putting your dog in a harness rather than a lead so he would be less easy to steal?
SleepOhHowIMissYou · 04/11/2018 12:39
Firstly, it's great that you recognise your fear is irrational. I second seeing your GP about anxiety treatment, or perhaps seek out Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) privately if you can afford it.
As you've managed to verbalise your fear here, don't now shy away from it. You recognise it is irrational, build on it. Have a look online for mindfulness meditations and, once relaxed, face your fear and try to visualise it physically as a cloud. It's there, you acknowledge it, however it will not settle, let it drift pass you and float away. When it comes back again, repeat.
Also look online for information regarding anxiety and OCD to find more specific help.
Unicornandbows · 04/11/2018 13:06
I didn't even think about it as anxiety when the house break in happened initially it was the big window doors that they smashed I wasn't in the property at the time. My response was really over the top with industrial type shutters you find outside shops along with cctv and a brand new security door at the front of door as someone tried to kick the front door. I felt like I needed to turn the house into a fortress. I couldn't sleep well and would wake up to check if everything is OK. Now I don't know why I feel I need to protect my dog which is a pomsky 10kg ish dog is going to be kidnapped. He has a harness as he slips the normal lead very easily and I usually take him out with an extendable lead I have brought a short leash because I feel insecure with him being too far whereby I can't just pick him up and run away quickly. I sound like a crazy person. When my family member takes him out in the evening I try to avoid knowing when he is out because otherwise I am looking out the window worrying something has happened. When he goes for long walks and I've had the mispleasure of seeing him out of the house and they are not back in an hour I call the family member asking if everything is OK and when they don't answer I am reduced to tears and actively trying to find him.
My husband thinks I'm being overly protective and to a degree I agree but I think it's not normal. I don't let my dog stay downstairs at night incase of break in and kidnapping so he has to stay upstairs with his dog bowl etc until someone is awake.
I am so sick and tired of feeling like this I don't know if it's anxiety it's an irrational fear I want to stop but I don't know how this is not normal I've not been like this ever before.
Unicornandbows · 04/11/2018 13:16
The breaking point for me today which made me realise its irrational was when I was thinking of legal ways of carrying some sort of weapon to help me through the walk and thought I should buy one of those rape alarm sounds and in the meantime should carry a screwdriver. (I didn't take it on the walk) I felt at that point I have gone to far and Its hard to detach as its not a single thing eg spider or heights it's more complex hence why I don't know how to deal with it.
Think it's time I speak to my gp and I agree I need some therapy
Persiangirl · 04/11/2018 13:20
Can’t believe you have perfectly described my existence - I am obsessed and worried daily about my beautiful little dogs being snatched or stolen if we are broken into. It mainly started when I was pregnant - perinatal anxiety my GP called it - and I was referred for CBT.
It did help to a point but still have mild and regular anxiety about the very same scenarios. I try and rationalise that the probability of it happening has a ratio of this and that etc.
It is definitely milder now, the pregnancy antagonised my anxiety massively.
Might be worth asking GP for a referral to local CBT - it was free in my area - North London.
Best of luck xxxx
DeltaZulu89 · 04/11/2018 15:15
I know how you feel, I used to have visions of the boot of the car flying open on the dual carriageway and the dogs falling out and being killed.
It’s good that you are recognising when you are going too far and would second previous suggestions of the GP. If that’s not ideal for you, I found meditation exercises and visualisation techniques very helpful, and you can download them online.
You can get collars which state “IM NEUTERED” making your dog less attractive to dognappers, which is a more reasonable way of reducing risk to him.
I would suggest seeking some help ASAP, because I found a big upswing in anxiety when my baby was born. I hope things get better for you soon, and congrats on the pregnancy! :)
Unicornandbows · 05/11/2018 12:19
Yup so I have booked an appointment for gp for Friday.
Thanks for the help!
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