Poetic Justice

[NoseTitZilla]

I was driving down a one way street (in the correct direction), got to the end of the road and at the junction I signalled to turn right. As I waited to turn right, a car with a young man in his early twenties pulls up to my left in an old ford fiesta and he also signals right. I turned and looked at him a little confused and frowned, which he met with a smirk. I was going to pull out (carefully as I didn't quite know what he was going to do) as it was clear for me to go but I suddenly noticed a cyclist approaching quite quickly so I stopped before I pulled out of the junction. This man pulls out across the front of my car to cut me up, and pulls out in front of this cyclist, in front of his path. Seconds later and I think the cyclist would have been over the bonnet, so the cyclist was very lucky. Except, he wasn't any old cyclist, he was a police officer and I don't think I've ever heard someone bellow so angrily in my life (I felt like it echoed in multiple postcodes, he did a John McEnroe "you cannot be serious!") nor have I seen someone drive a car in a manner so sheepishly before as the driver got signalled to pull over.

I shouldn't have got my kicks from it but I'm so sick of shit drivers and being shit on in general, it's been such a shitty mcshit week.

So, no AIBU, do you have any tales of poetic justice?

I was crossing the high street of my hometown with my best friend’s sister (who was about 12). As my friend’s sister was crossing, she realised that she had left her phone in the car, so she turned to go back. Perhaps slightly annoying to the man in the BMW waiting for her to cross, but not so annoying that it justified him slamming on his horn and shouting ‘make up your mind you daft bitch’ at her. So I was supremely satisfied when he immediately thereafter attempted to follow a resident through the gateway onto the pedestrianised part of the high street. Because he didn’t have a pass, the bollards came up, lifted his car, tore off the front wheel and shredded the engine. He wasn’t hurt in any way, and it bloody served him right for screaming abuse at a child in the street.

I had a bloke assault me once. He had me full body pressed up against a door squeezing my throat while standing on both my feet to keep me there. I managed to get him off me and give him a few good smacks in the face to stop him coming back at me. He gave me the evil eye, called me a fucking bitch and spun around to storm off. Cunt fell over his over feet and I watched as he went down like a tonne of bricks without time to put his hands out to break his fall. He smashed his head on the floor and his eye brow bone hit one of those metal carpet strips and cut his face open. I laughed myself stupid and ran off.

I'm so sorry that happened to you Peanut. I'd have chuckled about it too but he deserved a lot worse!

Any others?