Delivery driver just had a dump at my house!

[WitsEnd2018]

AIBU? I've just had some furniture delivered and the first thing the guy said was, 'Can I use your loo?' I didn't want him to but felt that I couldn't refuse so I reluctantly said yes. He was in there for ages. He's had a smelly dump. It fucking stinks. I could have cried. He then bought the furniture in and I've just had to go and clean the toilet. I'm disgusted.

Unless someone has a medical issue i can’t understand how people have to poo immediately at the first sign of an urge OK once in a while, but medical advice is that you don't do this routinely because your body ceases to register the urge and that causes all sorts of problems. This is a delivery driver - if he isn't ever to ask to use a customer's loo, then he will be routinely ignoring the urge.

Package delivered!

Better than shitting himself

My dil would be exactly the same as OP. She is so observed by whiffs she has plug in air fresheners in most rooms, also sprays air freshener bloody constantly and uses far too much fabric conditioner so their washing smells nice.
You need an oxygen mask to visit. She would faint if anyone apart from their immediate family had a poo in her toilet. She has even complained to me that my son's poos smell awful which I think she was blaming me for....so I said sorry

Obsessed not observed, Sorry!

@WitsEnd2018

"I didn't mean for it to be funny, I just needed to offload."

I'm sure he felt the same way. 😂

Erm no. Definitely not all of us

This has to be the very quintessence of tempting fate. I hope I'm wrong Jenny

You know what, OP? I think you should actually phone the furniture company and ask for a partial refund, on the grounds that the guy used your loo. Go on. The person you speak to will enjoy telling people about you for the next twenty years! They might even write about you here on MN next time there's a "most ridiculous customers you've ever dealt with" thread.

Well, now you know. Next time a delivery drivers asks, say no and direct them to your front lawn.

Perhaps chuck a leaf or two at them from a safe distance, and be sure to announce "NO POST-POOP SANDWICHES" through a megaphone every ten seconds while he relieves himself.

Partner is a tradesman and has to work, what is he supposed to do?

Bring stuff with him, like VIPoo or matches or air freshener so he doesn't stink out someone's house. Make sure he doesn't leave someone's toilet a mess.

I make my own kids clean up their mess if they make one in the toilet. You should never expect someone else to clean up your shit unless you're so ill you can't do it yourself.

Or next time, say, yes , you're more than welcome but we are waiting for a plumber as it doesn't flush. That way, he won't shit unless he's really brazen

There seems to be one of these threads every few months. Toilets are for using. It is just nice to let delivery people, builders, visitors etc use your loo if they are in your house. How the hell do some people function outside of the house? So you never go to a public toilet or one that other people have used?

That's what air freshener is for - and windows

And he clearly used neither!

If a public toilet mings, I'll try to avoid it

At least he washed his hands if the towel was a bit skewiff, he could have not bothered and touched your door handles after

Oh no, this thread is still trending!

I was reading MN earlier today and the thread title showing in the links was making me wince.

"Had a dump" is terribly vulgar OP.

I've had to pop into town and back, and was really hoping it wouldn't be showing any more. (I am only half joking. OP is sensitive to strange poo, I am sensitive to certain slang phrases )

I've never understood people getting upset over this. It's a toilet. It what's it's for.

Yes, it's unpleasant when it stinks, but then you open a window/door/whatever and air the bathroom. And that's it.

Friends and family are welcome to poo at my house but not randoms
Are you Paul's mum? (anyone else remember that advert?)

How ridiculous!
He was probably busting for a shit and you made his day.

I had new carpets fitted a couple of weeks ago.

Carpet fitter asked if he could use the toilet, I said yes of course. I was sat in the bedroom which is next to the toilet, I heard spraying.
5 mins later he returned mortified & red faced & jokingly said ' sorry but when nature calls' I just laughed it off & said in return ' we are all human don't worry about it' and I just changed the subject & asked him if he wanted a cup of tea...

We all have these 'when you gotta go you gotta go' toilet emergencies ....

No big deal here ( but the guy who used mine used the toilet brush & sprayed air freshener & opened the window )

Poor guy must have been desperado to use a customers toilet for a number 2 

OP, maybe you shouldn't have these dirty, dirty men bringing your furniture to your home...think of the dirty hands, and to filth, and, and...

Get over it, it's a toilet.

Lol at tradespeople having to fill their pockets with Vipoo and air freshener, oh and a box of matches. Just in case they need a poo.

This thread is the funniest thing I have read on here for ages.

Yes, it's unpleasant when it stinks, but then you open a window/door/whatever and air the bathroom. And that's it.

Yes, you do, you don't expect other people to do it for you .

Lol at tradespeople having to fill their pockets with Vipoo and air freshener, oh and a box of matches. Just in case they need a poo.

LOL at knowing you have to use clients' toilets all the time as that's the nature of your job and not having the common fucking courtesy to clean up after your own shit and keep a pack of matches in your pockets so your client doesn't have to smell your shit .

This is hilarious. I'm more surprised at the PP who said urgently needing a shit hasn't happened to everyone... You just wait. You haven't had yours yet my worst was in Thailand, nearly didn't make my flight... Fond memories!