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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

6 weeks to find a new House

55 replies

fulltimeworkingmotherof4 · 02/11/2018 11:25

I've lived in my house for almost 9 years, renting privately from a friend. Paid her rent every month and have no tenancy agreement. Her circumstances have changed and now she wants her house back, in 6 weeks! She's had her house up for sales since June and not mentioned she'd be wanting this house back. Waiting until it's sold to tell me. I've got 4 kids and Christmas to sort. I'm being advised to make her wait until after Xmas but she's adamant there's nothing she can do. Wwyd?

OP posts:

seventhgonickname · 02/11/2018 15:54

I wonder then it this friendship will last.
Do your best and if this fails and it takes longer to find somewhere then she'll just have to accept it.That is the price she pays for not knowing the law and for not organising,she.must know that 6 weeks is not enough.
Agree with others that you should de clutter and start packing non essentials as this will take some of the stress out.Put the word out to friends and family that you are looking for somewhere and get onto right move etc.
Good hunting.

Bananacakes · 02/11/2018 16:00

Legally you have 2 months from the date you pay rent. It’s perfectly possible to move in that time but you will obviously be restricted by the area and availability.renting in this country is dire. To be stripped of your home is heartbreaking.

Original poster

fulltimeworkingmotherof4 · 02/11/2018 16:57

I paid my rent on Wednesday and she told me yesterday. That has also made me think she's know all along. No I don't want to fall out with her, take it to court etc. I've booked a viewing at a house on Monday so will see how that goes. Got a mental weekend with youngests birthday party tomorrow then will start de cluttering. I'm gutted, been here so long it's all the kids know 😥

OP posts:

Jaxhog · 02/11/2018 17:02

She isn't a good friend if she does this to you. Friendship works both ways.

Find out how long she should give you from CAB, and try and find somewhere else in that timescale. Tell what this is, and say thats as fast as you will go.

Jaxhog · 02/11/2018 17:03

It does make me wonder what she told her purchasers? Do they even know it's rented out currently?

Original poster

fulltimeworkingmotherof4 · 02/11/2018 17:08

@Jaxhog they aren't buying the house I rent, she's sold her marital home that she shares with STBXH. She wants to live in the house I'm currently in.
She's perfectly entitled to live here, it's her house, I just feel upset with the notice she's given me when clearly her plan all along was to move back here.

OP posts:

Brizzledrizzle · 02/11/2018 17:14

So considerate of you to say thank you for the effort I went to to find out information for you OP . Evidently I wasted my time if you don't have any basic manners

DontCallMeCharlotte · 02/11/2018 17:14

To be fair, even if she had served notice, it would still only be an extra couple of weeks.

I've been in your friend's position, although we were renting out our house through agents and we had this last time we moved. Although we'd done everything correctly in terms of serving two months' notice, we hadn't told our tenant previously because we had no idea whether our somewhat niche property would sell ( it was also a business). We had a completion date on our sale but our tenant couldn't move out for an extra week (EA's had advised her it wouldn't be a problem!) so we were "homeless" for a few days.

I know it's the worst timing ever though and I hate moving too (15 times and counting...) but just think, in a couple of months it will all be over.

And you may not have to keep moving, after all you haven't moved for the last nine years .

Jaxhog · 02/11/2018 17:21

Gotcha Op. I still would question whether she is truly your friend though. You've been there 9 years, a real friend would have given you lots of notice, even if it meant potentially not having a renter for a bit. She has put her convenience squarely before yours. That is NOT the action of a good friend.

Good luck in finding somewhere better.

Hidillyho · 02/11/2018 17:26

Did you ask her why she didn’t let you know before?
Can’t she just live there with you for a bit? Not ideal but you are friends

LakieLady · 02/11/2018 17:28

I'd tell her I'll move when I'm good and ready and that I'll see her in court, then get advice from CAB/law centre or similar. If she was a true friend she'd have given you a lot more warning that she'd want the house back.

As a PP said, there is a tenancy, your friend just didn't go to the trouble/expense of getting the paperwork done. She could even have inadvertently created a secure tenancy, which is why you need specialist advice.

No way would I be moving on her say so. She must have had shedloads of money out of you in all this time.

There's probably not much point in going to the council. The first thing they will do is check if the request for to leave has been served properly, and as there isn't a tenancy agreement that they can check, it won't have been. I bet they'd tell you to stay put.

Also, if you were to leave when legally you don't have to, the council would deem you intentionally homeless and then they wouldn't have to give you emergency accommodation (at least, that's what the councils round my way would do, I daresay some might be a bit more lenient).

RedHelenB · 02/11/2018 17:36

Thinking outside the box a bit is there any chance as she's a friend that she could move in with you until you find another rental property. Unfortunately it will be luck of the draw as to whether or not you will be in your next property for so long. Is buying a house out of the question?

overagain · 02/11/2018 17:57

To be fair, even if she had served notice, it would still only be an extra couple of weeks.

Not true. It's takes an average of 42 weeks to evict tenants via section 21 notice.

Notice is just notice of intent to evict. Only the court can enforce it.

Princessmushroom · 02/11/2018 18:12

I know you said she’s a good friend, but you won’t get over this. You will always resent her for this.

By law she needs to give you more time. End of.

Good luck

DontCallMeCharlotte · 02/11/2018 18:24

To be fair, even if she had served notice, it would still only be an extra couple of weeks.

Not true. It's takes an average of 42 weeks to evict tenants via section 21 notice.

Yes, if you're going to play the system but I'm guessing most tenants will do the decent thing and leave within the two month notice period.

DontCallMeCharlotte · 02/11/2018 18:26

I hasten to add I'm not referring to the OP - she's been well and truly shafted.

Treacletoots · 02/11/2018 18:30

I think there's some middle ground here. Technically you could sit there and wait for her to evict which could take MONTHS.

Or you could find your dream property in 3 weeks and want to move out asap. I'd sit down with her and calmly negotiate with her so that you both have the solution you want.

Remember you are friends, and that whilst she could have told you sooner the stress of her divorce probably made her behave badly. However, because you are friends you'd also expected her not to turf you out on your arse. She could always rent a room until you find somewhere.

Bombardier25966 · 02/11/2018 18:32

With 4 kids I imagine if you were officially 'homeless' there'd be a possibility you'd get a Council House with secure, low rent for life within a couple of weeks if you had a family member or somewhere you could temporarily stay at?

Maybe in cloud cuckoo land...

Girlicorne · 02/11/2018 19:00

This happened to us in January, our landlord was selling and we d been there 9 years. We live in an area mainly owned with few rental options and letting agents wouldn't touch us (self employed, one income, bad credit). We were very particular as it was traumatic for the kids anyway, the only home they'd ever known so there was no chance of us moving their school as well, and dh who is sahd doesn't drive. We got our notice on 29th jan and signed new tenancy 16th feb, moved in 1st March so it is doable. Sadly as tenants we have zero rights once a landlord wants their house back, friend or not.

Not sure where some people on this thread live but local authority housing is unattainable around here, even with imminent homelessness we were way down the priority banding (band 3 I think, 2 year waiting list!!!).

Also please don't wait for court eviction, do you really want to put your children through that?

I totally agree that your friend should have given you more notice but rough as it is, it is what it is and you need to start looking for somewhere else to live as soon as possible.

Original poster

fulltimeworkingmotherof4 · 02/11/2018 19:30

@brizzledrizzle I wasn't being rude on purpose, I've got in from work and had 35 party bags to fill as well as trying to keep an extremely excited 4 year old calm and into bed so she's not miserable tomorrow. Thanks for the info, I did have a quick look and will look properly when the older kids are in bed and I'm back home from picking up a birthday cake 🍰

OP posts:

Original poster

fulltimeworkingmotherof4 · 02/11/2018 19:36

I really don't want for it to get nasty, I've gotten my head around the fact I've got to move it's just the timing. With Xmas around the corner it's extra expense I could do without. To be fair I'm looking forward to viewing the house on Monday, it's only around the corner and school etc wouldn't be disrupted. With working full time I rely heavily on family so don't want to move too far. Thanks for all the replies, I'm sure it'll all work out!

OP posts:

EvaHarknessRose · 02/11/2018 19:43

It sounds like you are weighing up the low rent she has given you against the inconvenience, and I think in your circumstances I would do the same and want to respect the favour to the best of my ability - but keep a record of everything you are doing to find a new place, so if the viewing doesn’t work out and nothing else suitable you can say you are trying to work to the tiny timescale, even though legally it is unenforceable.

ChipInTheSugar · 02/11/2018 19:55

We had our section 21 given on 30 September (not completed correctly though so maybe not worth the paper it's written on) and we move into our next rental tomorrow. It CAN be done but I won't deny I was panicking a bit.

Original poster

fulltimeworkingmotherof4 · 02/11/2018 19:59

Thanks @ChipInTheSugar it's good to hear and good luck with the move!

OP posts:

BlueEyedBengal · 02/11/2018 20:56

Hope you find your new home soon. I had this happen to us 6 yrs ago and it was the most worry I have had in my life. I had 5 children then 3 under 4 yrs and a 20yr old on his second yr of uni and a 18 yr old with autism really cried more than I thought possible. I thought we would end up in a caravan in a lay-by. Got ok in the end and just in time as I just found out then that I was pregnant with no6 baby, held it together but only just.

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