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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To Hate The Phrase BabyWearing

44 replies

LetTheDogsOut · 01/11/2018 21:34

I don't really know why but the term 'babywearing' really gets my goat!
You don't 'wear' a baby fgs!
I've seen very large toddlers in a sling and it just looks so uncomfortable for all concerned. I'd be so worried about tripping over and squishing the baby.
But, each to there own as they say.
The term just annoys meGrin

OP posts:
HellenaHandbasket · 01/11/2018 22:32

I do know, yes. The term comes from attachment parenting, as it refers to literally 'wearing' them for the first few months. A lot of people like help from more experienced carriers, especially when wrapping newborns hence the school/qual part.

randomsabreuse · 01/11/2018 22:34

I only use the term baby wearing when I'm being shocked at myself for doing such "earth mother" and "hippy" things. Usually in combination with the shock that I used cloth nappies for a year as well... not my natural habitat!

DH and I both carried our DD until she got to the point where she needed the exercise to be pleasant to be around. Still debating a lightweight toddler sling option for emergencies. Hardly used pushchair.

We do walks in woods, fields etc with stiles and kissing gates rather than boring tarmac paths. Sling is perfect for that. Mountain walks we have a rucksack carrier as it has better rollover protection... and space for stuff!

Our town is also shit for pushchairs. All the quick routes are steps, or cobbles, the lazy option is a pram unfriendly (too small) cliff railway and it's flipping miserable pushing or restraining the weight of the pushchair as well as the child.

Could see the appeal in different location but not here.

Am definitely on the hunt for a running buggy though so I can keep up with DD!

SweetheartNeckline · 01/11/2018 22:35

I'm 22 weeks pregnant and carried my 2.5 year old up Monument this week. She walked miles that day but couldn't have safely managed 300 spiral steps! I have a very comfortable ergonomic carrier and DD is only 2 stone ish (average for her age) so it's fine. It makes things possible that wouldn't be with a pram or pushchair. It packs down into a small bag when not in use, again unlike a pushchair.

I am also a "babywearing peer supporter"... I still hate the term babywearing! YANBU to hate the term (it's wanky, exclusionary and pretentious) but I would respectfully suggest that your worries about comfort - perhaps you never found the right carrier for you? - and baby-squishing are unfounded.

ChalkDoodler · 01/11/2018 22:36

I used a sling a lot for Ds2 who had severe reflux and was under local hospital for it. Great to keep him upright.

Plus I had Ds1 who was 3 which meant I had my hands free to hold his hand rather than him hold the pram.

I never called it baby wearing. I carried Ds2 in the sling on my back until he was about 2 1/2 years old.

But I was able to carry him in my arms even when he was about 6 (due to other issues with his legs) but Dh couldn't manage it. It is all to do with what you are used to.

So yes, I imagine if you are unused to carrying a child then carrying a 4 year old would seem difficult. But if you have done it daily for 4 years it is easy.

AlmostAlwyn · 01/11/2018 22:38

I travel often and wouldn't manage my toddler without my sling! Prams can't go everywhere and I have yet to find somewhere I can't go while wearing (Wink) my baby Smile

Original poster
LetTheDogsOut · 01/11/2018 22:52

For the last time, IM NOT AGAINST THE ART OF CARRYING A BABY IN A SLING, I JUST FIND THE TERM 'BABYWEARING' WANKY!
I said I found it odd that somebody would carry a 4 year old in a sling but if it suits all concerned then that's great. just don't call it babywearing

OP posts:
Hedgehogblues · 01/11/2018 22:58

Then why are you so smug about using a pram?

Original poster
LetTheDogsOut · 01/11/2018 23:06

I'm not smug! I just said I used to love pushing my baby in a pram! I only had one baby so maybe if I'd had another I might have experimented with a sling if I had a toddler to chase too.

OP posts:
Platypusfattypus · 01/11/2018 23:11

I totally wore my baby for the first few months. Couldn’t put the bugger down.

I don’t call you old fashioned for using a pram either. Pretty sure slings were around before them.

BackInRed · 01/11/2018 23:14

It's a stupid term, my baby gets a comfy, snuggly ride in her baby carrier. I don't wear her because she's not an accessory or piece of clothing.

chrisinthesun · 01/11/2018 23:15

Never heard of it. Ever.

Pigeonpresent · 01/11/2018 23:17

It’s from the same wanky pot as ‘dreamfeed’ just ewww

KoshaMangsho · 01/11/2018 23:21

I have done both. Used buggies with both boys. Carried them in slings. DS2 was tiny and it was easier on the school run to ‘wear’ him than push him. Also I never really did the sleeping in the pram thing- got them to sleep in the cot as much as possible. Once they had a good routine going and were a bit older we started pram napping in the afternoon if I wanted to be out and about. I found slings a huge lifesaver with DS2. DS1 was performing in a concert and I snuck in at the back carrying a sleeping DS2 in a Close Caboo, waited for his solo part and snuck out again. Trying to do this with a pram would have been hell and ds2 would certainly have woken up.

Also. In India (where my parents live) the pavements are narrow and not buggy friendly at all. Most of my friends in India use carriers when they are not in a car for this reason.

Fatasfook · 01/11/2018 23:23

I love slings, I love baby carriers, I love using them! They are so great!
The term” babywearing” though, that I fookin hate.

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 01/11/2018 23:26

I used a sling quite a lot, especially with my older child. "Baby-wearing" is not my thing. My children were also breastfed but I absolutely can't stand the term "boobing" e.g. " i'm boobing him to sleep". Just feed your child like every one else...

DrCoconut · 01/11/2018 23:50

There's a woman baby wearing  in a Hogarth picture. Suggesting it was the done thing then.

RebeccaCloud9 · 02/11/2018 10:11

Yeah but @drcoconut pretty sure the woman in the pic didn't call it baby wearing Hmm

MyNameIsNotSteven · 02/11/2018 10:20

I loathe it, and the labels 'natural' and 'gentle' parenting. Both loaded with smugness and judgement. I know someone who uses all of these and likes to make sure everyone knows all about it on FB. The topic of BFing came up somehow once, and she claimed to be surprised that I'd BFd both of mine. Thing is, I didn't ram my parenting choices down anyone's throat. What she gave away in that comment was her silent judgement of me, not that I give a shit what she thinks, or what choices anyone makes about feeding their children.

Anyway, the point I'm making is that the term babywearing goes hand-in-hand with the holier-than-thou attitude that some have about BFing etc. Can't abide it. My parenting is no better or worse than anyone else's thank you very much.

Birdsgottafly · 03/11/2018 07:34

"she reckons she carries her 4 year old up mountains in a sling!"

I have a Friend who comes from an impoverished Nigerian background. She and our other African Friend refer to a Newborn on the front as being worn. Any older and its called 'putting them on your back". Because of subsequent pregnancies, they will avoid carrying older toddlers, but will tie them on their back, or side , if necessary.

When she visited home, her pram was stollen and when she was reporting it, she was met with derision because people use prams as status symbols. They aren't practical.

When 'wear' is used by someone outside of the UK it sounds normal.

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