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AIBU?

To feel pressured and want to complain...

25 replies

cjt110 · 31/10/2018 20:45

Oh my... I've never been before and due to work commitments it seemed s good option for me to get my routine depo jab.

I booked in advance. Called today to check if I could get an earlier appointment or needed to take anything.

Clinic was running behind and when I was taken in, I was advised they couldn't give me the jab as they have no medical records from my GP.

I was quite miffed at this and explained I had called, even earlier today, and nothing was mentioned.

The nurse took some of my medical details and then basically went on a crusade of how I should have an IUD fitted and how much better it was for me. Then sent me away to get "evidence" of my last depo jab from my GP. She even used the words "I should be on commission for these IUDs"

Fair enough I know she works in a sexual health clinic but she bombarded me with information on something I don't want information on and just kept on and on.

It made me quite uncomfortable - so much so she commented how high my blood pressure was. I felt intimidated and like I was being forced into another method of contraception.

I don't want to change. What I am on is fine and suits me. Grrrr.. Now I need to plead with my GP tomorrow to fit me in for my depo this week as I don't want to go back to the FPC. I have my own reasons for not wanting anything put into my body and she made me so uncomfortable...

I felt like a kid who'd been caught shagging... I'm 31 and married fgs.

So wibu to make a complaint about no mention of nor having my records, refusal to administer my jab and the giving unsolicited information

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cjt110 · 31/10/2018 20:45

Apologies for lack of paragraphs.. Am on the app

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 06:55

.

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CuriousaboutSamphire · 01/11/2018 07:00

Call and speak to the practice manager, or email them:

  1. Their lack of prep is not your issue, why didn't someone let you know earlier, why didn't they chase it up with your last GP?
  2. This is your contraception, she has left you uncovered
  3. Whilst she has a job to do (they often prefer the coil/implant as it takes less of their time) you felt patronised and insulted and her manner was totally inappropriate.


See what s/he says!
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AnonaMouse1 · 01/11/2018 07:10

I couldn't bring myself to complain about the NHS . What will you gain from it?

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bellinisurge · 01/11/2018 07:10

What a patronising cow. Complain. I bet she's treating everyone like that and putting people off seeking medical advice and help.

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SLL · 01/11/2018 07:14

What is it with the coil these days? I asked for the depo injection as I had been on it years before and it was brilliant. The doctor talked about the coil, I said no. It might be the best thing ever, but I don't fancy the idea of it, thank you. She got out a dummy model and handed it to me. I looked at it, pulled a bit of a face and said, still no thanks, I really just don't want something inside me. She suggested I might need counselling... I'm in my mid-40's! Shock

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TheWernethWife · 01/11/2018 07:14

This is not a complaint about the NHS but about an individual who happens to work for it. How many more women has she upset with her attitude.

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bellinisurge · 01/11/2018 07:17

I had a nurse suggest a coil to me. I told her that if she thought I would let an hcp near my private parts after the mess they made of delivering my baby, they had another thing coming. That shut her up.

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FallenSky · 01/11/2018 07:19

I couldn't get a gp appt for my depo last year so had to go to the FPC. They said as I had never been before and they didn't have my records they would have to treat it as a new contraception. Did all the checks they needed (is it suitable for me etc) and then gave it. So I can't see why the FPC couldn't give it to you. I'd complain.

As for pushing the iud, I've had the talk before. I think it's more cost effective for them but I've had 2 in the past (copper and mirena) and didn't get on with either of them so won't be getting another.

I'm now on sayana press, which is the same as the depo but I can self inject. Need to go every 3rd/4th injection back to the FPC so they can check all is OK and prescribe more but so much easier than trying to get an appt at the right time for it.

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Littletabbyocelot · 01/11/2018 07:22

Anonamouse it's not about what you gain as the complainer, it's about ensuring quality of services. As a manager of health care services, you often don't know there is a problem if no one complains. I remember getting one very embarrassed complaint call from an older patient who had been made to feel uncomfortable and who hated complaining but didn't want anyone else to feel that way. What they complained about was shocking and unacceptable - and I believe the member of staff knew that as they'd never done it when being supervised. It turned out to be regular practice and we uncovered a lot of other worrying things. In the end it became clear that person wasn't fit to work in healthcare.

That's on the extreme, but without that one complaint we would never have known. But at the minor end, its an opportunity to reflect on how patients perceive things, or to identify training needs. Complaints are really useful.

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 07:40

This morning I'm still cross and upset about it. I don't care if it's more cost effective for the NHS.. I know my body and what works. I had an horrendous time on the pill and the depo is like a dream for me.

I don't want to "gain" anything from this but I want to perhaps stop younger, more impressionable people being bullied into a choice they don't want.

I will call them today... whilst trying to sort my contraception out... sigh

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CuriousaboutSamphire · 01/11/2018 07:55

If it helps, I too made a call to a practice manager about my depo being questioned. He was very understanding and it as never mentioned again.

Many years later (about 20) I was asked about changing to the implant. I was given a leaflet and my usual depo injection. That was it. I read up on it and decided that they had a point (I am 53 and menopausal) and have just had my 2nd implant. No pressure, just treating me like an adult and giving me information and letting me make up my own mind.

Hopefully you'll get a similarly decent response today!

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 08:51

Oh I had the full... this is an IUS and this is where it sits with the book and cut out of a womb... How much better it is hormone wise for eh body and the, what I felt, hard sell.

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Ribeebie · 01/11/2018 09:01

Hope you get it sorted. Ask your GP surgery when they squeeze you in for your depo if they can swap you to Sayana pres, it's the same drug but it's one you can be taught to self inject. Once you have got the hang of it you would only need to go in for a review once a year and do the injections yourself at home.

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enoughisenough2 · 01/11/2018 09:04

Lack of compassion or patient care. Complain

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 09:11

Managed to get a cancellation tomorrow morning with my GP.

Will definitely ask about the Sayana Press. I will do some reading today about it but it sounds like a good alternative for me.

I'm comforted that it doesn't seem I'm being unreasonable in speaking to them

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Butcowsdontgetmarried · 01/11/2018 09:12

I was pressured into a Mirena by a consultant at a check up. It took several attempts to get in, over half an hour. I was alone. I couldn’t stand up after it, I was bleeding and in pain for days.
I complained, as a result when that hospital offers a coil they give women the info leaflet and time to consider. Had I read the leaflet I’d have known I was at the worst part of my cycle for having it (forced) in “whilst you’re here” as the only solution to heavy periods, after a scan re heavy periods. I lasted a week of illness and bleeding before I begged the GUM clinic to remove (they refused; I demanded and threatened to do it myself if they didn’t)
Perfectly valid to complain, the mirena targets/commission must be good, so good that nothing else matters.

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 09:34

the mirena targets/commission must be good, so good that nothing else matters. She even said "I should be on commission for the number of these I do"

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 09:43

Interesting article here about the IUS...

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Sidge · 01/11/2018 09:46

There are no targets or commission for fitting an IUS.

A Mirena is a safer long term option than depo for most women.

They are more cost effective, but the flip said is many women prefer them as you can “fit and forget”. If it isn’t suiting it is easily removed, whereas with depo you have to wait for it to be metabolised so side effects can persist.

You should never feel pressured, and of course complain if you felt you were.

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seventhgonickname · 01/11/2018 09:49

Complain to the clinic not mumsnet

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 09:52

seventhgonickname Cheers. I was asking whether it would be unreasonable to make a complaint... not complaining to MN.

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Butcowsdontgetmarried · 01/11/2018 13:16

Well complaining doesn’t have to be to get “compo” or waste time for no reason, it can change things for the better. There’s no need to put in a rant about irrelevant stuff. Just make the point you came for a depo, you think they could have done the checks if they didn’t have the record, you didn’t want mirena and felt there was too much insistence on this and you had to make another appointment so the whole thing was a waste of time all round. They might change their approach and that would be a good thing.

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cjt110 · 01/11/2018 13:52

Butcowsdontgetmarried I agree 100%

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Pursefirst · 01/11/2018 13:56

OP, this really pisses me off.

Another bloody example of the fking misogyny around women's healthcare.

I would 100% complain.

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