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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

dds nursery and TD

22 replies

Disneyfan18 · 30/10/2018 20:09

Hello everyone just came on to vent really.

My dd aged 2 was sent home from nursery today because she had a loose stool. She's not unwell I was called about half an hour after I dropped her off this is the 2nd time since she started in September.

For about 8 months my dd has had diarrhoea when it had been going on for a month I took her to the gp who ran some tests and even tested a stool sample the they were checking for intolerance and medical conditions but results came back that dd was totally fit and healthy and she has no allergies. The gp then told me about a condition called toddler diarrhoea and said she believes this is what dd has.

Fortunately dd onky tends to go once or twice a day if there ever is a time when she is genuinely unwell she will go more often but on a normal day she will go in the morning and again in the evening. I did mention to the nursery about the TD when she first started and again at the parents evening so they are well aware of what's going on.

I went to the nursery to collect dd happily but did remind them of dds condition and said I wouldn't be happy if this becomes a regular thing you still have to pay for the hours regardless of whether you keep your child off or they are sent home. I dont mind when she is genuinely ill but now not only have I had to collect her today I was told she has to stay away for 48 hours I've had to take time off work and try and find child care for Thursday as I have a hospital appointment as I am pregnant with dc2.

What am I going to do if they now keep calling me every week because of this and asking me to collect her? Being sent home will also mean 48 hours off. Ofcourse I totally agree if the child is actually ill I wouldn't want my child being exposed to bugs either but i do always know when my own child is actually unwell and act accordingly I dont even send her with a cold and the nursery know this. I want my dd to remain in nursery she's come a long way since starting and it's been really good for her but I dont see how its going to work if they are doing to be calling every other day asking for Dd to be picked up.

What would you all do? Anyone else been through the same? Also does anyone have any tips of how to keep the TD under controll? I've reduced sugary juices from her diet and increased fats but other then that im at a loss.

Many Tia

OP posts:

IceRebel · 30/10/2018 20:16

You would think nursery would use their common sense, especially since you've discussed her condition with them. The nursery I worked in was 3 loose stools in a session. When a child reached 3 their parents / carers were called to collect and it was a 48 hour exclusion.

MichonnesBBF · 30/10/2018 20:18

If possible ask your doctor for an official letter outlining the TD diagnosis, give a copy to nursery and from there a care plan may be made so all staff who need to know will be informed and can make much better decisions regarding sending home.

Original poster

Disneyfan18 · 30/10/2018 20:22

You would really dd doesn't go until the afternoon either so chances are if she were poorly id already know about it and she wouldn't be sent. I do know they have to be cautious at this time of year as there is a lot going around in the way of bugs but its so frustrating.

OP posts:

Mammyloveswine · 30/10/2018 20:31

I've always been of the "sensible" approach to loose stools... keep an eye on them and see how they are over the next hour.

Now I have children of my own I'm even more relaxed, some of my staff will suggest sending ch home because of "diarhea" when it's obvious the child has just probably had lots of fruit!

Ask to see their policy and get a letter from your doctor if you can. They are being ridiculous.

Jezzifishie · 30/10/2018 20:36

I would agree with getting a letter from the doctor if possible. I have a note on my daughter's file at nursery - she doesn't get sent home for rashes. I was having to pick her up regularly because she was breaking out in a really horrible looking rash, and they were worried that it was a bug. It turns out that she just has really reactive skin - she comes out in hives when she's cold, heat rash when hot, she comes out in random rashes when overexcited, sad, when it's Tuesday afternoon...

YetAnotherThing · 30/10/2018 20:47

Rather than going to your GP to essentially referee with the nursery, why don’t you try taking the nursery a patient information sheet from an NHS Trust like this one below (random from google). You could then make a deal that if she’s got a fever or more than 3 times etc you’ll pick her up, otherwise she stays?

www.nnuh.nhs.uk/publication/download/dietary-management-of-toddler-diarrhoea-10-1-9/

Kitsandkids · 30/10/2018 20:55

Personally I would send her back tomorrow if she’s not ill and remind them that you have already spoken to them about the TD so they should know there’s no need for her to be off.

FittonTower · 30/10/2018 20:56

I had this with my son, although he vomited fairly regularly rather than loose stools. He was a sicky baby/toddler, usually because he had a cough. As he's grown up he's been diagnosed with asthma which explains it a bit but it took a sit down meeting with the manager expalining that my son vomiting a bit (and it was never much) didn't mean he was ill. Once I'd spoken to the manager the message got through and they were very good, i think we agreed a 2-pukes rule or something!

Original poster

Disneyfan18 · 30/10/2018 21:06

I can't just send her back in tomorrow her key worker made a point of telling me I can't send her for 48 hours I think I will be booking a gp appointment though i need to see them anyway so may aswell kill 2 birds

OP posts:

JohnCRaven · 30/10/2018 21:20

My friend's DD has a dairy intolerance. Some at her nursery kept giving her small amounts. Enough to give her diarrhoea but not enough for the major obvious reaction. My friend had to keep collecting her and keep her off for 48 hours till she clocked it was probably diet related. Sure enough once she reminded them absolutely no dairy her diarrhoea never reappeared.

Do you think there might be something on the menu which just doesn't agree with her tummy?

Wattonearth · 30/10/2018 21:25

My DD also suffered with TD and I used the same fact sheet as already attached and for a while managed it by cutting out the foods as described. I was having the same problem with nursery too only 1 stool passed a day but invariably it was loose so kept being sent home! I was at my wits end thinking i would have to leave work if it continued. But I got a letter form doctor and took fact sheet in and they were eventually understanding of the condition. They also helped cut out the foods as per the sheet. They hadn’t dealt with it before and as a parent you see so many stools... loose or not you also get to know when it’s bug or just TD. I hope they become more understanding if you can provide more info.

norfolkandchanceyou · 30/10/2018 21:33

I had this with DS. Explosive stools and a rash on his back over many months. I was under huge pressure at work due to time off. The last time I was called I lost the plot with the nursery manager in front of lots of parents eventually with her agreeing their was nothing wrong with DS and there had to be a cause. Food diary kept and it was linked to the day after he ate a certain food item. Once that was removed from his diet there were no more issues.

Probably not the cause here but I really sympathise

ineedaholidaynow · 30/10/2018 22:20

DS had TD, apple juice was the trigger for him. Not just drinking the juice, but quite a few foods especially some foods/snacks geared towards toddlers are sweetened with apple juice.

socksortights · 30/10/2018 22:25

I always fine if the runny poo is bug related it smell bad and is a weird yellowy/pale colour

Original poster

Disneyfan18 · 30/10/2018 22:36

Thank you so much every one I was so sure I was going to get lots of comments saying iwbu its comforting to know how many of you have been through the same! Thank you so much for all the advice and your stories I know what I need to do I will get straight to the gp tomorrow and I will also print off the info leaflet that a kind poster linked above thank you all!

OP posts:

Allthewaves · 30/10/2018 22:49

I'm guessing you Have tried changing her diet. Dairy gives all mine funny stomachs. Took two weeks for it to clear their systems

coatsandats · 30/10/2018 22:55

There are two types of allergies IGE and non-IGE. IgE are the sorts of allergies that cause fairly instant reactions and are picked up by skin prick tests/blood tests and the like.

Non-IgE allergies aren't picked up with those tests and tend to only be specified through use of a food diary/symptom monitoring type approach. Non-IgE allergies and "food intolerances" are used interchangeably.

First, I would do as PP suggest and use official information (either from GP or from the link above) about toddler diarrhoea but I would also keep a careful food diary (in conjunction with some dietary changes to allow you to monitor symptoms). I suspect that, like "colic" many cases of toddler diarrhoea can be traced back to non-ige food issues.

Littlefish · 30/10/2018 23:02

At the nursery where I work, we have had a couple of children in the past with toddler diarrhoea. In each case, they just brought in a letter from the GP confirming that it was TD and we were then far less likely to ring the parents.

Aftereights91 · 31/10/2018 06:47

My son is like this! He's 2 and He can sometimes go up to 5 times a day, and it's like a Mr whippy. It takes him by surprise too so he doesn't make it to the potty on time. I've told nursery but when he did it at nursery they did the whole 48 hour diarrhea thing too, and it's not bloody diarrhea he's not ill

hibbledibble · 31/10/2018 07:03

Yanbu

We had the same. Called immediately to come collect after a loose stool, when my child has always had loose stools. Interestingly they didn't call for many other occasions.

It didn't happen again after I spoke to staff and explained it was normal for her.

I wouldn't ask your gp for a letter unless as a last resort as it is a waste of their time.

Smilingthru · 31/10/2018 07:34

My DD has a similar condition. Hasn’t had a solid stool in about 6months; just constant diareah or water! Nursery have the same policy. I went to my GP and got a letter for nursery stating what they problem was, that’s it’s not infectious and shouldn’t effect her attending. I then met with her key worker to explain further. She’s been there over a year now and she hasn’t been sent home once. They know it’s her condition and not illness. Maybe try that? X

EnglishRose13 · 31/10/2018 07:51

My son has this too! This thread as been really helpful. Luckily, the nursery hasn't once called to collect him because of it.

Thank you, everyone.

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