To have told DD not to do his washing anymore?

[AintNobodyHereButUsChickens]

My husbands brother lives with us (whole other thread, don't even get me started on that....) and he's a lazy bastard where anything housework related is involved. Will do what he can to get out of doing it. I was in the kitchen earlier today prepping the dinner when 7yo DD came in dragging BILs laundry bag and she started to pull his dirty clothes out and put them in the washing machine. I told her to stop and she goes "But uncle X likes me to do it!" (Yeah I'm sure he does ) and I said that she shouldn't be doing it as I don't like her handling adults dirty underwear etc. A second later BIL walks into the kitchen and takes over from her and loads it all into the machine.

For context I don't let her do mine and DHs washing either, I know what bodily fluids end up in our underwear and I don't want her touching it, let alone BILs. She does hers and baby DS' washing quite happily and she knows how to work the machine (she had just turned 5 when she taught BIL how to use it!). I just don't think it's great for a child to be handling adults dirty pants

I wasn't unreasonable was I?

Does he at least pay rent and towards bills and food? You are subsidising his business so I hope you have some shares in it!

I would give him notice now, if generous then until the new year, but otherwise a month.

At least while he's there give him a list of chores which are non-negotiable. Does he shop and cook at all? Does he clean the bath or loo? Does he tidy?

Does he have his own part of the house beyond just a bedroom?

He does pay rent, this is the main reason DH doesn't want to ask him to leave (although he's pretty fed up of him too) because BILs rent has paid for the vast majority of our house renovations so far. We would struggle to finish our house without him.

Despite being 26, they were brought up in the 1950's where the man is king and the women are the mens personal maids. DH is not like this at all and he probably does more housework than I do! Not much cooking but he's perfectly happy to do laundry, hoovering, dusting, cleaning etc. BIL has never voluntarily done anything remotely helpful although he would if told to do it.

BILs girlfriend sometimes cooks for us although this is rare. I can think of one occasion where BIL has cooked tea for all of us completely by himself, and that was only because I was ill with Shingles and physically wasn't able to do it. I don't often cook for him though as he works long hours. He tends to buy his own food and occasionally will buy us all a takeaway.

He just has a bedroom to himself, every other room is shared.

As to why DD knows how to use the washer, because when she was a toddler she used to love pressing the 'start' button and was desperate to use the knob to select the program, so once she got older I showed her which program I always use and I let her do it. She knows how to switch the dishwasher on too. She loves being helpful like this and she also adores dusting but hates tidying, you should see her room

Fucking hell, I'll come round if you like and tell him he's a lazy skiving bastard and then I'll draw up a household tasks rota which includes him but NOT your child, who should be doing almost ANYTHING else other than the domestic chores of a grown man.

His girlfriend??? So you sometimes get to have 2 of them in your home???

Renovations or not, you really do need to put in his exit plan!