DD9’s anxiety issues

[Martind12]

DD9 has started bedwetting recently. Until a month a go, she hadn’t wet the bed for years. DH has been going through some difficult health problems recently and is off work. I know this is causing her alot of anxiety and it seems obvious the bedwetting has stemmed from that. She wakes up wet most mornings and this only upsets her further. Me and DD were both getting really tired of the nightly sheet changing, she was never getting enough rest for school. So we decided that it would be best for her to wear pullups for the moment.
Last week however i caught her using one of DS2 dummies. She had a dummy until aged 6 ish - which was past when she should’ve done we know (not all the time just at night before bed). I didnt say anything at the time because tbh I didn’t know what i even wanted to say and she’s been using it everynight before bed as far as i can tell.
My poor baby is so anxious atm i dont know whether i am being mean denying her something thats obviously giving her comfort. I cant really see the harm as she isnt sleeping with it in and nobody else knows about it so she’s not going to be teased.
We are seeing the doctor about the bedwetting and have booked an appointment with a child psychologist for her anxiety. I dont want her to majorly regress but the pullups seem necessary and the dummy seems to be comforting her through this really horrible period. Am i doing the right thing here?

It could be the onset of puberty. My dd was very very anxious and clingy about a year before she started her periods. Shed always just ran straight into school, buy She got to year 6 and started sobbing saying "She missed me" ect. Its heart breaking, isn't it.

how old is your youngest child?

Also if she has been regularly wettin for a month after bein previously consistently dry., you should be getting her checked for a UTI

I don’t really think this is puberty. I know she’s really worried about her dad. We’ve tried to reassure her that everything is being worked on with the doctor and that Dads going to be okay but she isnt stupid. DS is 2 yo so is too young to really understand what’s going on. Hoping to rule out things like a UTI when we see the Doctor monday, dosen’t seem like one tho, her urine isn’t smelling or dark for example but will get that checked out.
Hate seeing her so anxious and worried which is why im leaning towards letting her have whats make her feel most comfortable for the time being.

Bump

If the gp rules out physical things like a uti, the the gp may want to refer to camhs. You can always speak to the school nurse and most schools these day have an elsa (emotional learning support assistant) you could speak to

I think what many people do in this circumstance is to try and minimize the health difficulties. You may be better off by being more open with your dd about the issues. Unexplained worries can be more anxiety making than when you know what you are dealing with. I would also keep school informed that she is worried about your dh and that she may be more anxious about things at school as a consequence.

Hi all,
She was checked by the doctor for a UTI but that was negative. Doctor believes it is likely stress related.Poor girl. She’s still wetting most nights but the night nappies are doing their job. She’s slightly embarrassed wearing them but is happier waking up to dry sheets. I’ve told her she can use the dummy if she feels she needs it. She didn’t realise i knew but said she is happier now she isn’t hiding it. We are working as a family on her worrying about dad, reassuring her he will get better (which he should) and that its not her fault etc.