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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not let my DP giving oral sex ?

13 replies

IneseK · 27/10/2018 00:08

I used to love it with my other boyfriends, both giving it and getting it. My boyfriend doesn't get it tho. Bless him he has tried hard but I can't relax and feel uncomfortable (for several reasons like his stubble and he's so rough with his tongue)
I still do bj and I don't mind I do enjoy doing it . He never forced me or anything I feel like it's important to mention. I think he might be getting a bit upset cause I don't let him down there but it's so uncomfortable! I tried to explain how I like it but he's not getting it.
Otherwise the sex is good 9 out of 10 times (roughly I mean who knows 🙄) and I climax but it's just the oral sex ... if anyone has any advice don't hold back!

OP posts:

ineedtostopbeingsolazy · 27/10/2018 00:11

When he's down there can you give him some pointers like 'a bit softer' or 'slow down'.

TinselAngel · 27/10/2018 00:16

Is this your first post on mumsnet?

Original poster

IneseK · 27/10/2018 00:20

How is that relevant?

OP posts:

PointlessUsername · 27/10/2018 00:21

Tell him the reason why?

FissionChips · 27/10/2018 00:25

There is a sex topic for this kind of post.

Original poster

IneseK · 27/10/2018 00:25

I have tried to explain and he tried to do it differently but it just doesn't work. I don't want to knock his confidence level so been explaining slowly bit by bit but he just doesn't get it

OP posts:

AjasLipstick · 27/10/2018 00:34

Tell him to shave!

AnnieAnoniMouse · 27/10/2018 00:37

Be blunt. ‘You need to shave first, be gentle, and listen to what I’m asking you to do’.

...but it might be easier just to bin him and find a new boyfriend rather than trying to change this one.

MulticolourMophead · 27/10/2018 02:30

There is a sex topic for this kind of post.

And a) newbies can't post there initially, b) not everyone knows about it or where it is.

Rebecca36 · 27/10/2018 02:53

Just tell him you have to really be in the mood for that sort of thing and move on to something else. Get him to shave more too! I hate stubble.

Men, quite often, really don't seem to understand that women are not machines. It all has to start in the mind and build up and intimacies of all types really need to be initiated by a woman.

busybarbara · 27/10/2018 08:30

Maybe he feels if he doesn't give it a go he won't get the BJs for much longer. He might be happy to lay off if he knows you're not a big fan but that he also won't lose the BJs.

Rosehip10 · 27/10/2018 08:35

There is a reason "newbies" can't post in the sex topic, its to stop hairy handed perverts and teenage boys posting shit to here others "experiences"

overagain · 27/10/2018 08:36

I hate oral. Always have. It upsets DH as he likes to give it but I just can't enjoy it. There are certain things I'll put up with in sex for the sake of marital harmony but not that.

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