Am I a total skinflint?

[toomuchtooold]

A kid in DD's class grabbed the hood of her winter jacket and ripped it - not just the seam, the hood as well. We're in Germany where the kids all (it's not obligatory but almost everyone has it) pay 1 euro for accident and liability insurance, so I went into school to see if I could claim for her jacket on our insurance or on the insurance of the kid that grabbed her jacket. The class teacher found out about this and has now contacted the mum of the boy who's phoned me up and offered to pay for the jacket. I was like, great, thanks, shall we claim on the insurance? And she was like ach no it's not worth it for a "kleinigkeit" (like, a little thing) of 25 euros. (Sorry, that was long, but that's the punchline). I feel quite stingy now, but I don't think I could let 25 euros go! Am I a skinflint? Would you write off 25 euros rather than fill in an insurance form?

I would write off the £25. It’s kids.

Maybe she hasn't paid it, but preferred to say that rather than admit she hasn't?

I’d claim. Or accept the money from the parent of the child who damaged the coat.
€25 might be a little to some and to others it may be a lot.

As long as the mum is willing to pay for the replacement, which it seems she is, and I wasn't left out of pocket I wouldn't mind how that was achieved.

Do you think she’s trying to shame you? That shit doesn’t work on me alas. Just do whichever you’d rather do. 25 euros or 25 pounds or whatever, it doesn’t grow on trees and I don’t particularly care what other people think. Just say oh thanks very much and accept it.

You are getting reimbursed for the jacket, so that should be the end of your worries in the matter, surely?

Well I'd write it off, but for some people it's part of a food budget etc, so not so easy to write off. It depends on your circumstances.

Depends on your circumstances.

It’s cold and the jacket is ripped now. Presumably it takes time (a week?) to get the money. Maybe 25 EUR isn’t nothing to her and she’s enough of a “skinflint” to wait if it was her own child - but thinks it’s more polite not to keep you waiting for the claim to be processed?

I'm not worried about it Flora, I'm just interested in how much other people consider to be an amount small enough to write off.

Perhaps she has the money and it's less hassle to pay than claim

If she's offered to replace the jacket, I don't think it's necessary to claim in the insurance.

No, I'd claim.

I'm just claiming my whopping £30 back from the council for using reusable nappies ignoring the fact I'm only getting £30 despite having spent hundreds on the fecking things.

My dad used to not claim things back at work if they were small and he got in trouble! They'd rather he'd claimed. Not sure why.

If she already offered to pay for the jacket, why do you need to do that via insurance?

I mean, obviously now she's said she'll pay for it, I wouldn't claim, but otherwise, yeah I would.

For damage that my children caused, without being arsed with insurance and explaining who did what and why and all the fuss, about £30 ish.

I'm in Germany and didn't know about this insurance, my DD is 4 though so not at school yet. We have a good 2nd hand shop in our town where you can get coats for under 10Euro.

I think this depends on circumstances too, to be honest, I'd probably just have written it off rather than go to school, get the teacher to find out, speak to thr mum, fill in the insurance claim etc, but I am fundamentally lazy when it comes to shit like that.

Do you think she’s trying to shame you?

I don't think so although if it was it wouldn't work on me either!, She's very nice, the woman - her boy's a menace, once we were at soft play and he got a hold of DD and got her in a headlock and started hitting her, unprovoked as far as I could see - but she's lovely. If I'd known she was going to replace it out of pocket I'd probably have left it TBH but I felt as if I couldn't not follow it up, as the boys in DD's class seem to play very rough and the school don't seem to do a lot to stop it. Other DD (twin, same class) has come back with a really deep scratch on her hand off one of them a couple of weeks ago, and they seem to be fighting all the time in the playground. I know there's a culture here of letting the kids sort out their own differences and I know I only get a 10 minute snapshot at dropping off time but the boys seem to be going after the girls a lot and I felt like not doing anything about the jacket would be to silently condone that, you know? Bit of a drip feed sorry

I'm not worried about it Flora, I'm just interested in how much other people consider to be an amount small enough to write off

So the jacket scenario not really relevant? Just how much money we could afford to lose in general? Probably I'd write off up to £50, depending on hassle involved, I am guessing then.

If she already offered to pay for the jacket, why do you need to do that via insurance?

Well I was thinking I could claim the insurance and give her the money back.

Bananalanacake it's only at school - I think all the Bundeslaender do it.

So you want her to pay it as some form of passive aggressive point? I'm not really sure what you're saying. It's fine to claim on the insurance. Some would, some wouldn't.

I think of you are concerned about the rough play in the school you should talk to the teachers about it.

I don't think trying to make an insurance issue out of a coat hood is going to be a tipping point in solving this problem.

I'm just interested in how much other people consider to be an amount small enough to write off

Personally, nothing is too small for me to write off if there was any way to recover it, as long as it covers any costs. £25 (or Euros) is certainly something I'd pursue one way or another. accident or not. Look after the pennies and the pounds look after themselves.

whether she can write it off or not surely depends on her budget, her income?