Took the kids to our local Wimpy on Tues. Both DS's (10 & 7) are autistic, but it's more apparent with DS2 than DS1 who is a skilled 'masker', whose mask slips only occasionally. The staff and owner have always been kind to us in the past so I'm still feeling upset about what happened.
The owner had already been over to put the lid back on DS2's milkshake because he'd took it off and removed the straw. I wasn't bothered so much but still went slightly 
when the owner said "he's making a mess with that" - it was dripping slightly on DS2's jeans which I cleaned up.
We ate without incident and when DS1 returned from the toilet I went, with the usual instructions for the pair of them to behave nicely and wait for me. I got back and DS1 was looking a bit red faced, mumbled something about spilling his drink and getting told off. I went to pay and the lady on the till was pleasant enough so I said something like "I hope my kids haven't caused too much chaos", and she said "oh, no worries" and smiled, and then we left so I could speak to DS1 properly.
DS1 then tells me that he spilled his milkshake and was brought the mop & bucket to clean it up. And when he'd finished he went to put the mop back, but not in the correct place (he didn't know where the correct place was), so the owner called him a stupid boy.
I did think about going back but ultimately that wouldn't have helped my son, and also wouldn't have changed the fact that we will never return so I thought I'd just try to make the rest of the day nice for my boys. (DS1 did seem to get over it quite quickly, I should add).
I'm still reeling a bit though. It's possible the boys were mucking about and that's how the drink spilled, although nothing like this has happened before, I suppose there has to be a first time. But I don't think it's usual for a restaurant owner to expect their customers to do their own mopping of spillages. And even though DS1's executive functioning can make him seem a bit 'ditzy' I think it's a bit much to call a kid stupid because they don't know where the bloody mop goes.
Anyway this post is too long already and I still haven't got to the AIBU. So, AIBU to think that this kind of thing will happen a lot, to both my kids, but especially my DS1 who just seems a bit clumsy and awkward, but actually has a neurological difference?
And am I also BU to not know how to bolster them both for dealing with it when it does.
(and I don't need telling I am being very U to let this make me avoid taking the kids anywhere in public, because I obviously can't protect them from this kind of shit.)