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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think WTF at dentist’s receptionist.

71 replies

RedSkyLastNight · 25/10/2018 16:12

Just picked up a message on my phone.
It from the dentist’s receptionist.
To tell me that they rescheduled my husband’s appointment next week.

AIBU to think WTF? My husband is a fully functioning adult, with his own mobile phone, whose number the dentist’s surgery has, why on earth would the receptionist think it was appropriate to ring his wife to pass on this message?
(isn’t it a breach of privacy if nothing else – I mean I knew he had a dentist appointment next week anyway, but what if there was some reason he didn’t want me to know?)

OP posts:
IamDrWho · 25/10/2018 16:48

Huge over reaction

Kewcumber · 25/10/2018 16:50

Do they often call your Dh to cancel or change your appts? I too would think "WTF?!"

Heatherjayne1972 · 25/10/2018 17:01

They could be in trouble for this
We are subject to quite strict confidentiality and of course the gdpr thing
What should have happened is they should leave a message for your husband on his mobile
Or if on the landline a message along the line of ‘it’s the dentist please can you call us’

Might be trivial for you but the receptionist could get a telling off

DarlingNikita · 25/10/2018 17:02

YANBU, for reasons of confidentiality and GDPR if nothing else. I'd definitely have a word.

SistersOfHearsey · 25/10/2018 17:02

You need to feel bloody honoured! GDPR means I can't actually ask our Dentist when DH's appointment is. I tried, on his request, when I went the other week.
I asked if it was soon? Couldn't tell me.
This month? Couldn't tell me.
She couldn't even confirm if they had his new mobile number or not. I gave up in the end and told him he needed to sort it out his bloody self.

AllTakenSoRubbishUsername · 25/10/2018 17:03

I'm not sure why it has made you so angry but it's probably a simple case of ringing your number instead of his by mistake on the database.

catlovingdoctor · 25/10/2018 17:06

I work as a dental receptionist, and often we set members of the same family up on the system as linked; who ever registers first may have their number as the available one to be used for all members. I've spoken to innumerable people on behalf of their spouses or family members. It can get very busy sorting everything out.

blueskiesandforests · 25/10/2018 17:11

Ye gods people, threads are started on which ops are "fuming" or "furious" about the mundane and banal multiple times per hour, why the pile on here?

It is a wtf moment I agree. As is the poster's mother receiving calls about her appointments! My first thought was the receptionist had mixed up numbers, but if she knew she was calling someone other than the competent adult it is an odd and unprofessional choice.

Uncooperativefingers · 25/10/2018 17:12

Not sure why so many are having a go at you here OP. Surely this comes under the definition of "wife work" that so many posters (legitimately) complain about every day! Just like a MIL expecting the wife to be social secretary for her son (like I have read on here 100s of times). Those poets are always on the side of the OP...

FWIW, I'd be annoyed too.

Coconutspongexo · 25/10/2018 17:13

Why are so many of you trying to turn this into a feminism issue

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 25/10/2018 17:14

I doubt it's "wife work" at all. It doesn't make sense for them to ring the OP. They won't have been able to get through to him I bet.

Ring up and ask OP

MarthaArthur · 25/10/2018 17:16

Exactly cat. My dental surgery operates as family groups and everyone in my household is connected. Surely if its that paramount you never hear of dh's appointments phone up and make a note that you must never be contacted for his appointments.

YearOfYouRemember · 25/10/2018 17:18

Clearly the update hasn't happened. What an over reaction. Use your faux feminist credentials for actual issues.

JacquesHammer · 25/10/2018 17:19

You are very lucky if this is all that you have to get het up about in your life

These comments are so fucking nonsensical.

Most people obviously have the capacity to be bothered by the big issues and the minutiae in life.

spanishwife · 25/10/2018 17:21

ansaphone?

SingaporeSlinky · 25/10/2018 17:28

Definite overreaction, sorry. They might have tried his first. These things happen all the time, my DH has specifically asked people to call a certain number before and they’ve still called the old number. I’ve had a nurse call me with a message for my DM because she accidentally called the ‘in case of emergency’ contact number. I’ve specifically asked school to call landline in first instance and they still call mobile.
Pass on the message and move on.

womenmatter · 25/10/2018 17:41

Confused who cares

WorraLiberty · 25/10/2018 17:42

Oh the drama of it all

Next time you're passing, pop in and ask them why it happened.

Might be better than assuming sexism.

safariboot · 25/10/2018 17:45

Do you often book things together, attend checkups one after the other, etc? If so then it's no surprise you get a call about DH's appointment.

OlobobTop · 25/10/2018 17:46

I think is it a bit odd, and I would be a bit like  at this happening to me.

That said I think dentists just be a bit lax on data protection, I was once given an appointment letter for my next check up when I was paying etc and it had my moms next appointment details on there. We haven't even lived at the same address for about 5 years so I was a bit like 'eh?'. The receptionist seemed a bit bemused when I asked why it was on there.

DPs dentist also started sending his brothers appt letters etc to our address for some reason, they haven't lived together for about 10 years and he had obviously been ignoring them for some time and hadn't bothered to change his address from his mom's for benefit fraud reasons. They obviously decided that at 30 years of age they still lived together so used our address when DP changed his

Sleephead1 · 25/10/2018 17:47

I work in a doctor's we would never do this it's a breech of confidentiality. We aren't allowed to speak to any one else other than the patient , we can't confirm the appointment we can't even say if they are in the surgery unless the patient has said my wife / husbands parking the car can you tell them I've gone into appointment. If they havnt said this and their spouse comes in and asks we can't even confirm they are in the surgery. I obviously know nothing about a dentist surgery but I would assume they are bound by confidentiality aswell.

OlobobTop · 25/10/2018 17:47

I also think of this happened at the doctors you would have got a totally different response from other posters OP. Don't see how it being the dentist means it doesn't matter and that you're overreacting.

notangelinajolie · 25/10/2018 17:49

Seriously Chill. A way over the top reaction OP. The receptionist had a contact number and she used it. I'm presuming you have passed the message on? So at the end of the day job done.

For some reason my hairdressers texts my DH my hair appointment reminders the day before I'm due to go in. I really don't care as long as he remembers to remind me. I think I possibly used his mobile to make my first hair appointment and the number got saved somewhere in their system. I'm not going to pick an argument with them over it!

londonista · 25/10/2018 17:49

What catlovingdoctor said.
They probably have patients at same address linked as a family and certain numbers are thrown up first, and she didn't check.
My husband gets calls and texts about all our GP appointments because he registered us all first years ago.

Couldn't get worked up about it tbh, unless it happened all the time and was becoming an annoyance.

florenceheadache · 25/10/2018 17:55

sorry op you come across as hard work. you need to chill out a bit, getting worked up about a phone call will lead to an early grave.