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AIBU?

To be a bit miffed about no proposal

10 replies

Deltaquinn · 24/10/2018 14:20

To be honest, I'm not bothered about getting married. I could not get excited even in the slightest bit about white dresses, meals, flowers... none of it. BUT, my OH doesn't really know this. I know he asked his ex to marry him. She left him before they got around to it. He's never asked me and it makes me feel like I'm not as good as her. I don't want to bring it up for fear of looking like a proper big baby. I am being a big baby, aren't I? While I don't want a wedding, I do want to be loved and to know I'm his 'one', not just his 'one for now'. Am I being a dick? I reckon I am a bit.

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LucieMorningstar · 24/10/2018 14:22

How long have you been together and how old are you both?

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ashtrayheart · 24/10/2018 14:23

His GF left him before they got round to it. Maybe he feels this is a bad omen and doesn't want the same to happen between the two of you?

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ilovesooty · 24/10/2018 14:23

If you're not interested in getting married it's not surprising he hasn't proposed. He's not a mind reader either presumably.

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SilverySurfer · 24/10/2018 14:24

Why don't you propose to him?

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RedDrink · 24/10/2018 14:25

Have you actually discussed long-term plans together?

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AyoadesChinDimple · 24/10/2018 14:26

You aren't BU but you do need to let him know how you feel.

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Firstbornunicorn · 24/10/2018 14:26

Yeah, I suppose you are being a bit of a dick (lol!) but I was exactly the same. I didn't want a wedding, but I wanted to be married.

DH didn't realise I wanted to get married until I told him. Men are thick sometimes!

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SuperGekkoMuscles · 24/10/2018 14:31

Have you had a talk about the future?

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Secretsquirrel101 · 24/10/2018 14:33

My answer depends on a lot of things tbh; how old you both are, how long you’ve been together, how long you’ve lived together, whether you’ve made it clear you want a proposal etc. In principle, I don’t think you’re being a big baby, you feel how you feel. Talk to him.

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Blanchedupetitpois · 24/10/2018 14:35

I think you should talk to him. It’s weird not to - what other massive life decision would hou ask your partner to participate in without first having discussed how they feel about it?

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