To ask how to be a good parent?

[westwalk]

Mumsnet is obviously a huge place and of course you will see a whole host of different types of people and opinions. Something that always terrifies me is the number of posters who seem not to like their mums. Now sometimes this is for VERY good reason and I understand it completely. Other times it seems for things which are relatively unimportant (a poorly worded card, visiting too much / too little, taking too much / too little interest in babysitting etc).

I was very very lucky and had a wonderful relationship with my mum and although I am certain we annoyed each other at times we overlooked it. Now that I have children I terrified that I don't manage to achieve what my mum did and my children grow up irritated and annoyed by me!

Aibu to worry about this and can I
Also ask for some more positive stories / advice about being a good parent?

I think that asking that question already shows you’re a good mum. It shows you’re thinking about your children, your relationship with them and their future. I am no contact with my mum as she was neglectful and Abusive and I doubt very much she ever asked herself that question lol.
I think we all have doubts and second guess our parenting but for me I think I’m a good mum because my children are loved and well cared for and they know I love them. I think that’s all we can do really :)

Nobody is a perfect parent but most try their best. Most kids want little more than for their parents to spend time with them. As long as you are doing that, you are on the right track :)

My little girl's 5. So I know I've got a lot of challenges to come.

But the most important thing to me is that my child is secure. Secure in herself. Secure that I love her. My aim is that she can talk to me ( I guess in spite of my efforts that might not happen that's up to her to a certain extent). To me, if you are secure, know you're loved that is a basis for life and will set you up. And no I do not feel like that with my family so yes that is where it comes from. So try not to criticise. I spend time with her and be as affectionate as she'll let me (I think affection is important but she's not a cuddly person lol). But I respect her. No I don't think my mum respects. Things that aren't essential I'll listen and let her make her own decision on. I tell her the most important thing is to talk in relationships so people understand each other. Yes I feel like this cos I don't want her to feel like I do and don't want her to be treated like my mum does. Sometimes I think I'm a good mummy other times I think I'm failing.