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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WWYD - Flying with Chickenpox

87 replies

PoxyProblems · 22/10/2018 14:18

I've name changed for this because the scenario is very specific/identifying.

We (me, DH, DD4 and DS2) are due to fly abroad on Friday. We are supposed to be away for 1 week over half term staying with friends. DD had chickenpox last week, the spots appeared last Monday, she has not been too ill with it, they are all scabbed over and she is back in school today

But I am assuming DS will now get it. If he gets it before Friday, fine. We just cancel and claim on our travel insurance. But what if he doesn't? NHS website says the incubation period can be anything from 1 to 3 weeks so its entirely possible he will be fine to fly out but could get it while we are away.

If he did get it while we are out there, the main problem is that the friends we are staying with have a 3yo who hasn't had it, and would be exposed to it. But more importantly, they run a business that involves frequent contact with children so I could be potentially introducing chickenpox to their business, which obviously I don't want to do.

I don't think the insurance will pay out on the assumption that he will get ill as he won't have doctors certificate. The flights are non-refundable/changeable. DH has volunteered to stay behind with DS and I take DD away, but I'm loathed to do this because we hardly get to spend any time together as a family, plus I don't really like the thought of being away from DS if he's ill.

Do I risk going? What are the chances he might not get it at all? I don't think there is any real answer to this, I just wanted to vent and hope that someone can come up with a magic solution that I haven't thought of!

OP posts:

twosillybulls · 23/10/2018 15:19

I would not worry about the nursery too much. They are bound to get it at some point anyway.
I would say go if there are no spots. There's absolutely no guarantee he'll get it anyway.

AnonEvent · 23/10/2018 15:30

Words like "I'll leave it up to you", and the feeling that your friend is worried about the nursery/business, indicate that they'd rather you didn't stay with them with potential CP.

On that basis, and bearing in mind that your DC could show symptoms while out there, and you might have to stay longer with the same friends who aren't wholly encouraging you to stay with them, I absolutely wouldn't go.

CottonSock · 23/10/2018 15:58

I would go. Their son is in nursery, he could be exposed to it at any time also

itspants · 25/10/2018 09:31

Did you go?

Original poster

PoxyProblems · 25/10/2018 09:50

Flights are tomorrow evening but we are almost certainly not going. I spoke with my friends again who said they were worried about DS coming and the impact on their business. Better for us to take the hit on the flights than damage their reputation. But it’s pretty gutting. I’ve just got everything crossed that DS gets some spots before then. But obviously he’s totally fine and healthy and running round like a demented puppy...

OP posts:

Ali1cedowntherabbithole · 25/10/2018 09:57

I think your friends are being a bit unreasonable TBH. Chicken pox outbreaks affect nurseries. End of.

Imagine if your child doesn’t go and the nursery has CP anyway from another child?

As someone else said another child could be incubating on the plane...

RumerGodden · 25/10/2018 09:58

Any chance you can still go but sort different accommodation and wait it out a few days before you see nursery friends? Seems a pity to miss the whole trip..

TokyoSushi · 25/10/2018 10:03

That's a good idea @RumerGodden can you do that OP?

Original poster

PoxyProblems · 25/10/2018 10:12

We considered that but, honestly, I think it would feel a bit weird to be there and not see them. Also, it’s not super touristy where they are, we were relying on them to show us around etc. If DS did get it, we could potentially just be stuck with not very much to do.

I get quite anxious and it’s all been a bit stressful and I kind of just want to cut my losses now, as silly and wasteful as that sounds.

OP posts:

BakedBeans47 · 25/10/2018 10:28

I think your friends are being a bit unreasonable TBH. Chicken pox outbreaks affect nurseries. End of.

Exactly. When my son had CP I think there were only about 6 kids in the nursery of 70 kids who were in! If it’s a private nursery I guess they’ll charge anyway so I don’t see how it’ll affect their business. Plus it could happen at any time. I couldn’t be arsed with such precious people.

PotteringAlong · 25/10/2018 13:48

Better for us to take the hit on the flights than damage their reputation.

If they’re that worried then they need to be taking the hit on the flights, not you. I hope they’re paying for you to not go...

Mummyofscamps · 25/10/2018 14:08

Im mixed on this. On one hand if he's incubating then there's a risk to others, as pp have said. Eg vunerable, immuno compromised. On the other he's showing no signs of being ill, and there's no guarantee he'll get it. Id say trust your instincts.

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