To be fed up of my DM moaning?

[Rosegoldlilly]

She's on her 4th holiday of the year with my DF. She's in Iceland this time and she's moaning because it's windy and raining. She didn't do hardly any research before she went and all she's done since she's got there is complain to me that there's nothing to do and her tours got cancelled. I sent her things she could do but she's said she can't because of the wearer. Now I would love to be in her position. I'm a single mum and could of afford to get to Butlins with my DS this summer. I loved it and so did he but I'm a bit sick of her moaning I'd love to be in her position! She also went on a once in a life time holiday a month ago and when I asked how it was her reply was hmm ok, the excursions weren't great though. She clearly doesn't realise that I would love to be in their position! So AIBU to be a bit sick of the whinging?

Weather not wearer

I wouldn’t reply to any more of her messages while she’s away, just sign off with a ‘You shouldn’t be worrying about us while you’re away..’ and ignore.
People moaning about holidays in particular really get my goat. You spend so much on creating new experiences, it’s your responsibility to find the good even when things aren’t exactly ‘perfect’. Ive never had a bad holiday.
At least you know that the holiday you had had happiness and enjoyment.

YANBU. My DM is very similar. Her & her partner have had several 'once in a lifetime' holidays over the past few years. One of them with lots of flights which she moaned profusely about. Along with meeting up with friends & having to stay too long with them. These holidays have cost them thousands & they haven't been able to afford a holiday this year, which has resulted in her non-stop moaning & saying how jealous she was of our holiday.

Just a thought, but perhaps she doesn’t enthuse about her holidays to you because she doesn’t want to show off when she knows you can’t afford it right now.

I’m cross on your behalf.
Think about how you’re answering her messages though. Beating maybe a awww shame. Once you start looking up excursions for her you’re signalling loud and clear that you don’t mind her moaning.

She keeps texting me because she's bored and just sitting in a pub most of the time. Even if her tours have been cancelled I'd find another way to see the sights. E.g. hire a car. But no that's too scary.
Her once in a life time holiday they got at a massive discount so would not be able to go on it again, yet I still received moaning about it. She did ask if I wanted to come, I just laughed and said well I can hardly afford it at such short notice. She just doesn't get it.

alfie not at all, she likes to gloat. Especially before the holiday I don't hear the end of it. If she's enjoying something she normally bombards me with pictures.
Well I've told her now to stop moaning as id love to be in her position. The moaning has died down a bit but still annoyed me

I'd reply with texts detailing your own day, saying "and you think you've got it bad!"

Does she feel guilty because she realises she has more holidays (and exotic ones) than you? So she’s running them down to try and minimise the fact? Sort of “my holidays are not better reaaaly as this awful thing happened and that thing is rubbish” kind of thing?

Or is she just self absorbed?

YANBU, just because the weather is bad doesn't mean she can't have a good time. I hate it when I say to my DM I am going to x in x month (insert autumn/winter month as they are cheaper) all she says to me is oh the weather will be bad. I don't care! I am going away to get away, to he somewhere else and spend time with my family, if I wanted good weather I would go abroad somewhere hot. I have told her this and she still says it every time. I am sure there are other places besides a pub she could go to, museums, aquariums etc.

If she texts that she's bored, reply "If you won't hire a car and go out, what do you expect?"

The next time she moans, id send a reply. “I am busy and won’t be responding to any more of these texts complaining about your holiday. I am busy. You are so lucky to have such a great life. Most of us struggle to afford a short stay at Butlins.”

She's your mother, can you not just text her back something like
"Holidays are lost on you, all you do is whinge! Next time you stay and I'll go, I guarantee I'll appreciate & enjoy it"or

"Ok moaning Minnie, enough of the poor me texts please, some of us would love yo trade places"

I could totally send those to my mother and it would be fine, just shut her down

I did finally reply with stop moaning and it did almost stop. I also text her saying me and DS were having a great time. Which we were and she said she would prefer to have been with us!