Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Mixed race children Names (Indian+Black)

76 replies

Verstop · 19/10/2018 14:38

Hi, I am a North Indian Brit (Punjabi) and my DP is British-Nigerian (born here). I recently gave birth to a beautiful baby boy (two weeks ago) and I couldn't ask for more as I've never been happier. He must have the largest eyes and longest lashes that have ever existed! We agreed on a fairly racially ambitious name that would would be "pronouncable" for English speakers but also hinted at his culture...Taran. I think the name suits him but DP has recently expressed regret that his first name is "too Indian", resulting in feelings of dettachment. I'm truly confused as I love the name and think it suits my beautiful son. DP is now reqiesting we give him an "English" name as we are "both basically English and that's only fair". This just doesn't sit well for some reason. Don't get me wrong, I'm a proud British bird but I just want a name that reflects my son's ethnic heritage. Aibu to say to my (very lovely) husband that we can't change his name and what is done is done.

Also, I'm curious to know what mothers (And fathers) have named their mixed racial children. Which ethnicity have you "favoured" re names. One person is always going to be left out regardless of what middle names you choose. We agreed our next child will have a more Nigerian first name. (However we also agreed we want our kids' names to be "cohesive").

Hope that post makes sense as it was quickly typed on a broken IPhone :)

OP posts:
Elphame · 19/10/2018 15:15

Taran is a lovely Welsh name - it's the Welsh form of Taranis, the Celtic God of Thunder Smile

FekkoTheLawyer · 19/10/2018 15:15

Indiana? Indigo? Inigo?

Serendopety · 19/10/2018 15:16

As others have said, Taran is also a Welsh name meaning thunder - so it's definitely a British name too :)

Original poster
Verstop · 19/10/2018 15:18

Dh is pushing for Harry/Hari which almost every part Indian child is called.

OP posts:
Tinty · 19/10/2018 15:19

I know two Taran's they are both white british girls, I would never have even realised the Indian connection.

Rebecca36 · 19/10/2018 15:19

Just want to say, "Congratulations". Your baby boy sounds absolutely beautiful.

You could give him an English first name and the one you chose as second name, if it is really that important to your husband.

milleniumhandandprawn · 19/10/2018 15:20

We actually very rarely used our kids names when they were babies - we had so many pet names that the DCs probably thought their names really were “squishy mc squishface” and “mr.mouse”.

Even now they’re older it’s about 50/50 whether we actually use their names.

It might help your DH if he called your DS a Nigerian pet name?

I think you should definitely keep his first name as Taran- it’s the only Indian bit he’s got.

Original poster
Verstop · 19/10/2018 15:21

The way my Indian-born, older relatives pronounce his name sounds like Tullen(ish) which I just love.

OP posts:
Darkstar4855 · 19/10/2018 15:21

I think Taran is a lovely name and doesn’t sound “un-British” at all.

It’s not the 1950s - a lot of names that are currently popular in the UK these days are not traditional British ones but either have ethnic origins or are new.

YANBU.

Scatteredthoughtss · 19/10/2018 15:23

What's the surname? I get why you wouldn't go for an English name, that makes sense, and I think Hari is really boring and Taran is much, much nicer, but I think if he has a Nigerian surname then a slightly more Indian sounding first name is a good balance.

FinallytheneedforaNC · 19/10/2018 15:23

Lots of mixed race baby naming experience here, all two siblings and I have ended up with DPs from all over. So current precedent in this rainbow family is:

Sibling 1: DCs have sanskrit first names, English middle, neutral last name (they made a new last name)

Moi: DCs have scandi first names, Nigerian second names (I mean think strong Nigerian names, of the type that no one else can pronounce Grin ) and DH's last name (can't be asked with faff of name-changing!)

Sibling 3: English names all the way!

Your DP will get used to it, he just needs a gentle adjustment period.

Congratulations and good luck OP

DuckofDoom · 19/10/2018 15:23

I went to uni with a white South African girl called Taran. Seems like it’s a very cross-cultural name.

I agree with PPs- if he has a Nigerian surname, it’s only fair that his first name leans towards being more Indian

Ifoundanacorn · 19/10/2018 15:23

I know two Taryns and both are white English (one male and one female) so I am not sure everyone will get the heritage aspect.

I personally don't think you should override dp's concerns, your son's name should be one you both like and agree on. So maybe Taran is not the right first name and you should keep considering others and use it as a middle name.

I would go for an English name if you are Indian and he is Nigerian as then you favour neither culture more than the other. You need to also consider what your child will think in ten years time? Maybe he will prefer to be called Ben or similar.

I understand why you would like to honour your heritage, maybe your dp would also like to do this too? You can both do this in more meaningful ways than naming your son. Your son should have a name that fits in with his life, culture and future.

LokiBear · 19/10/2018 15:25

Does he have a name he prefers? Maybe culture has nothing to do with it, he just prefers the other name? It took me a while to get used to my girls names, even though I chose dd1's name and agreed to dd2's name very early on in the pregnancy.

Grimbles · 19/10/2018 15:26

To me the name Taran brings to mind the (white) actor from the kingsman films and the Eddie the Eagle biopic.

tiredgirly · 19/10/2018 15:28

do you know there is there is a board specifically for baby name questions/ discussions?

BlueBug45 · 19/10/2018 15:30

OP myself and loads of my friends' are in mixed culture/ethnicity relationships with children.

One of my friends' when asked about his children's names put it best - they have his, their dad's lastname, and therefore the mother chooses the first name. If the first name is not from his culture he just has to suck it up as they have middle names he had a part in choosing they could use instead of their first names if they so choose when older.

CherryValance · 19/10/2018 15:33

I absolutely love Taran actually, I think it's uncommon enough to be used by lots of backgrounds, but certainly can come under 'British'. I grew up in Wales but didn't know any. It's also the name of the hero in fantasy books by Lloyd Alexander. With a Nigerian middle name and surname already I say stick to your guns!

FekkoTheLawyer · 19/10/2018 15:34

I agree about the surname. DS has a right mouthful and no one has a clue where it's from (even in the family it's a bit of a mystery).

tiredgirly · 19/10/2018 15:35

Indiana?

wtf?

A girls name relating to a US state??

TatianaLarina · 19/10/2018 15:36

The boy takes his surname I don’t see why he gets first dibs on the first name too.

areyoubeingserviced · 19/10/2018 15:37

These are the things you have to think about before you marry into another culture.
My dh is Spanish and I am English.
Dh wanted to give all of our dc Spanish first names. However, I thought that since they had a Spanish surname it would be only fair that I choose their first names.
However , their middle names are Spanish

FekkoTheLawyer · 19/10/2018 15:40

Indiana Jones? Have you never seen the films? I also love Robert Indiana.

Xenia · 19/10/2018 15:44

Going for something like John might be a bit more straight forward. I appreciate I am the only person saying so but I think the boy will thank you later for having an English name.

CatsEye99 · 19/10/2018 15:50

Ours have very English names (think William, Mary, Edward, Emily).

We wanted our kids to have beautiful names that don't give anything away. They could be any age, any race, any social class, any profession. We are both British and live in England so we decided to go with the classics.

We are Indian/white if it matters.