I am very early in my maternity leave but was given a heads up at the beginning of the week by my new boss and HR that my role will be restructured and likely be made redundant. I'm aware of my rights and don't think this is a deliberate thing to get me out, I'm more a victim of some wider politics. There is no equivalent role for me although I could probably find another role in another area within the company, but it's not my preferred area and would involve a step back career wise. For various reasons it will take at lest another 6-8 weeks for the detail to work out so formal consultation in the new year.
The problem is that my mind has gone into overdrive. I'm the breadwinner and if I can't find an equivalent role, we can't pay the mortgage. I'm not sleeping, not eating can't focus on anything, can't enjoy my maternity leave or new baby, I am just utterly panicked about this. I've emailed my boss to explain the need for clarity but have been passed to HR who have told me to relax and watch Netflix (wtf?) feel like I have fallen into a hole.