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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To book bday party at 5:45pm?

35 replies

MovingtoLondonAgain · 18/10/2018 09:40

My DS has never had a party away from home and I would like to book a soft play centre.

However, birthday on a Friday (too expensive weekends) AIBU to book it for 17:45hrs on a Friday for a bunch of year 1’s?! Appreciate this is first world problems stuff! X

OP posts:

OutPinked · 18/10/2018 09:43

DD has a birthday party at the weekend that’s 4-6pm, I thought that was quite late for a birthday party personally and that’s on a Saturday.

I would only do it if you fully expect a few people to decline the RSVP. Lots of people finish work around 5pm and collect their DC from childminders or relatives afterwards, the last thing they’d want to do is rush to a birthday party at the end of a working week.

belfastbosoms · 18/10/2018 09:43

I think some parents would find that quite late. Can you not do it closer to school finish time?

Invisimamma · 18/10/2018 09:47

That would be too late for me I'm afraid. By the time you get them home, hyped up from softplay and full of sugar (around 8pm?) bedtime would be a night mare.

At that age bedtime was 7pm for my pair.

Fishforclues · 18/10/2018 09:48

It's a bit late, especially if they don't get good until 6.45/7ish. Though people will probably err on the side of caution and feed them first anyway.

We've been to a couple of Monday night soft play parties 4pm. We were dubious but they worked surprisingly well and the children practically had the whole place to themselves.

Fishforclues · 18/10/2018 09:48

Food, not good. Gah!

NoUnicornsToSeeHere · 18/10/2018 09:49

My year 1 went to a number of Friday night parties last year with a variety of finishing tunes between 6.30 and 9. The 9pm was a bit of a disaster after 8.30 but it really was ok as a one off (and I’ve got a crap-sleeper, won’t make up for it in the morning, bedtime usually at 7pm one).

NutBiscuit · 18/10/2018 09:51

We've had loads of parties in Reception and Year 1 which run from 6:30 til 8:30 on a Friday/Saturday evening. I winced at first but all the kids have been absolutely fine. In some ways later is better, as working parents often won't be able to get their child to a 4pm weekday party.

theclockticksslowly · 18/10/2018 09:56

Year 1 here too. We’ve had a soft play one from 4 to 6 on a Friday that was fine. Had to turn down a 6 to 8 on a Friday recently as just too late. Party excitement and sugar filled plus much later than usual bedtime - want to avoid that!

Could you perhaps check with your child’s close friends parents to see if they’d be there - if so it wouldn’t matter if you get a few other declines.

Mookatron · 18/10/2018 09:59

I don't think you're exactly BU but I wouldn't do it. Especially near the end of term (if it is). Recipe for bad/hysterical behaviour ime.

MinisterforCheekyFuckery · 18/10/2018 10:00

As a WOH parent I find parties on weekdays really tricky to be honest. If they start straight after school then DD automatically can't go as we're at work and she's in wraparound care. If they start at 5.30/6 ish then one of us can usually just about get her there in time but it's a big rush and then by the end of the party she's so overtired that bedtime is a nightmare. A lot of kids this age are in bed by 7pm.

Stonebake · 18/10/2018 10:05

I imagine it might be awkward with work commitments. A lot of parents I know work till after six. And on a Friday they probably just want to pick up their dcs and go home, not to soft play.

You can sometimes hire softplay equipment and put it up in a church hall and it works out a bit cheaper.

Or just book it and accept you might have a lower turn out.

jarhead123 · 18/10/2018 10:05

It's fine IMO.

redwineandcrisps · 18/10/2018 10:06

Ds is year 2 now but I would decline as it would just really mess up the bedtime routine - there is no chance after all that excitement and sugar he would settle down and goto sleep. Plus, I’d have to hang around between end of school and start of party. Sorry!

Fishforclues · 18/10/2018 10:06

Hopefully with 4-6pm parties, party hosts are sensitive to children in childcare and offer lifts if needed. Mostly their parents will sort out lifts with another parent, but if anyone replies saying sorry, my child can't make it because I'm at work, we've always taken them ourselves or sorted a lift for them.

Italiangreyhound · 18/10/2018 10:20

IMHO it is too late. I'd book it for the following Friday and do 4-6 or something if you can. Do something nice just you and your family on the actual day and a party the following week. Or if the party is a while away could you do it early? IMHO late is better than early but either would work.

If not then just go with it but be aware some may not be able to do such a late party.

mumofmunchkin · 18/10/2018 10:21

At that time on a Friday night, my kids just need food and bed. They'd be unlikely to manage a party, and I probably wouldn't want to risk it (and end up sitting in soft play with a crying child, or having to leave after 15 mins because he's too tired to cope).

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 18/10/2018 10:25

It's a bit late but not the end of the world. Just bear in mind that a Friday at that time people are usually winding down for the weekend and might think they cba taking their dc to a soft play party at that time and day.

Brainfogmcfogface · 18/10/2018 10:35

As others have said I’d be a bit, urgh, as it will mean DD wouldn’t go to bed till late so I’d lose my evening alone time (single parent) but it’s a one off and I think it’s important she spends time with kids outside of school and she’d love it. So not ideal but meh, it’s fine.

AjasLipstick · 18/10/2018 10:39

I think it's fine. People are shockingly precious in my opinion. Your DC won't explode if they attend ONE party on a Friday teatime!

You'd think OP had asked something ridiculous!

thethoughtfox · 18/10/2018 10:43

A child in my dd class had a Friday evening party and lots of parents didn't bring their child and said they felt it was not a good time as their child would be too tired.

Doyoumind · 18/10/2018 10:43

I think 4-6 is the latest I would do for Year 1s. I know someone who was putting their child to bed at 6.30 then. By 7.30 the children could be really tired and that could impact on their behaviour.

If they have younger children the parents might struggle and there's the issue of work commitments and how to get children to parties after school.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 18/10/2018 10:45

I don't think people are being precious overall, it's not the end of the world but for many parents, especially those who both work a Friday evening is one where they switch off and they might decline the invite that's all.

When mine were small they were invited to a few parties on a Saturday evening and we did attend but it wasn't something I was over the moon about if I'm honest.

Mookatron · 18/10/2018 10:47

Ajaslipstick have you ever done a party on a Friday tea time? Cos I have, and it has gone down in family history as the most horrendous kids party ever. There was actual strict shouting at one point, and a good proportion of the guests going on strike from musical bumps. I still can't really think about it 5 years later. Thank God the parents didn't stay.

Mind you that was reception and it was the Friday they broke up for half term, so maybe it'd be OK OP. Wishing you luck in the fray.

AjasLipstick · 18/10/2018 11:00

Mook My DC have attended a number at similar times yes. They were all fine. Soft play is soft play. It's always horrible.

luckylavender · 18/10/2018 11:08

I'd think that was fine on a Friday.

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