Please help, feel intimidated by my students

[Baleena]

Ive NC.

I lecture in special needs at a university. I'm standing in for a colleague for the next few months. These students of mine are going into a caring profession and it's essential they have a good understanding of how to work with children with SEN.

Unfortunately there's a group of them in the lectures who talk, laugh, whisper throughout my entire lecture. I know this may sound pathetic, but despite being so much older than them, I find it really intimidating.

I think I may have a touch of imposter syndrome. I need your advice on how to deal with this. SEN has been my passion for 40 years now, and the majority of my students are engaged. This group is distracting to other students, but as I say, also extremely intimidating to me. Because I'm only standing in for my colleague, I don't feel I can go to their superior to discuss the issue - it doesn't feel serious enough, they're just being a pain in the arse.

I need to find a way around it, it actually had me in tears I'm embarrassed to say. Does anyone have any advice for dealing with them and giving myself a bit of confidence?

Speak to these rude people individually and tell them the next time they disturb the class with their disrespectful behaviour, they will be told to leave. Then stick to it. You have no reason to feel intimidated by these twats.

I only teach Primary age children but I think you need to call them out on it. Maybe stop what you’re doing and say, “if you want to chat there's a cafe down the hall/road but whilst in my lectures you pay attention and stop ruining it for the others.” Then every time they start talking stop and repeat.

There’s a group on here called the staff room that might have more teachers with advice.

Hello OP. If students can't stop talking I usually stop and stare and them until they stop talking. Often this is quite effective. If not, I ask them to leave the classroom. My students pay £9k a year in fees alone, they have no right to disrupt everyone else's learning.

Good luck x

Don't be embarrassed. They're being rotten and bloody unprofessional. What sort of room layout are you operating in? I ask because part of my job is in training and CPD and this actually does sometimes happen. I often idly wander over to the group whilst I'm speaking and stand next to them. However, if you're in a lecture theatre, this is tricky. How many more sessions are you doing? Any way of having a chat with one of the students in this group? Or you could just complain about them! I feel for you though because this kind of thing can really rattle you!

*at

Stop and stare or ask them to leave

And yes. Stopping mid-sentence and deploying a Paddington 'hard stare' can also be really effective!

I agree. Stop and warn them once, second time they have to leave.

You lecture at a uni right? So the people there have paid to be there. If I were you I would try and get them before the next lecture and explain that you've noticed them disrupting the lecture. If they want to waste their money then fine but it's not on for them to waste the cash of others. You will expect to see them engaged and quiet. Or else they will be asked to leave. This isn't school, they are presumably adults, they need to realise that there are consequences to their actions in a way that mummy or daddy can't help with. perhaps getting publically kicked out of a lecture and wasting the ££ that one session totals to will be the lesson they need.

Do you have a line manager type person that you could raise this with as an area for CPD? You do owe it to the other students to ensure they are able to learn without distractions. You also owe it to yourself to be assertive and make your expectations about behaviour during sessions clear. You can do it!

As pp really, can you not directly address them either when they are actually doing it or after the lecture. They're not children, surely you don't have to worry about upsetting them, tell them they are being rude to not only you but the other students. Or perhaps ask them, since they have so much to say, whether they have something useful to add to the lecture. Are you allowed to send them out for bad behaviour?

You ask them once to be quiet, after that you ask them to leave, then report them to their tutor.

Call them out on their behaviour and ask them to act respectfully both to you and to the others in the class. Those that are there to learn will thank you for it. Then you can go on to wow them with your passion for your subject - 40 years experience and you consider yourself an imposter? No way!

Challenge and wait. If they were 11-16 and behaved like this, then they’d be called out for their behaviour. No need for a confrontation, but a little bit of astonished disapproval that they are interrupting and disrupting an adult environment might work. There’ll be plenty of students who absolutely have your back in taking this approach and who will be highly relieved.

Omg I feel you iv been there. It is so different when it is not your class, Iv not heard the term imposter syndrome but definitely lived it.
Try and remember you are not an imposter and you studies damn hard to get where you are. It is YOUR class, your classroom now for however long. Say something like ‘If you continue to distrust my lesson you can leave’. Usually this is enough although iv had to threaten security with some lively lads. Try not to lose your rag just remain in control and firm. Another one I like is to say something like ‘and I hope you got that last bit as it accounts for 50% of your exam’ as a lighter way to broach the talking.

Can you work out what is it that you find intimidating about this group particularly?

Is it one particular ring leader that you fear? Or all equally?

Do you imagine they are whispering/laughing about you?

I think if you are able to articulate the nature of your intimidation, it will help you better deal with it and may help you get better advice here.

Generally, you need to stop them chatting etc and you will only be able to do that by exerting authority - either one to one or in the class.

Are you responsible for grading them? Do they need to "pass" your class? If so you have some mighty power over them right there.

I agree with the waiting idea. Stop, wait and look at them. Soon others in the crowd will look at them too. Only when it's silent should you continue. Do this every time it happens.

I teach in a university on a healthcare course.
Either ask them to pack it in directly or shame them into it by engaging a hard stare and asking if they are ok/need help as they seem to be struggling.

If they dont pack it in ours get sent emails about professionalism.
Don't be embarrassed.
Is anyone mentoring you?

"Excuse me, but if my lecture is distracting you from your conversation, perhaps you could continue it in the cafe/bar. Thanks."

I lecture at a uni and yes of course students will occasionally talk in lectures - they're human. If they do I just stop. I stop talking - mid-sentence is good and stop moving (I tend to pace around when talking) and I look at them. We can often have a couple of minutes of silence with everyone in the room waiting for them to stop talking and them oblivious - often with a very embarrassed neighbour nudging them in the ribs. Eventually they shut up. I thank them and carry on. If they talk again I do the same again. And again. They'll almost never do it again but on the rare occasions over the years when people have I might then say something - polite but firm. It works really well. You're treating them as adults. No-one is humiliated. You're not being rude. You are just waiting. You have to train yourself to stay still and attentive through a few moments of silence but that's it. Simple.

The worst thing you can do is ignore it.

‘I don’t know why you bothered showing up if you weren’t going to listen. Why are you here? (Stare them out). It’s not fair on me and it certainly isn’t fair on the rest of the students. Either you’re hear to learn, or you leave.’

You need to be prepared to take it further if they continue it. Stop the lecture again. Ask them to leave. Report them.

Do not carry on ignoring them as it will only get worse.

Politely ask them to leave, your other students will back you x

Hard stare, then verbally challenge directly as others have said.

I remember one of my lecturers was brilliant and he bollocked a group of students and told them they'd be out again if they did it. We loved him. The other students were dickheads.

I do:
Begin the lecture with "Morning everyone, could I politely remind you not to talk during today's lecture. There's been quite a bit of noise from chat recently; this isn't acceptable as it disrupts other students' learning. Thank you".

When chat inevitably starts, stop mid-sentence + short silence whilst looking at the group then smile and friendly voice "Sorry lady in the red tshirt (or whatever) did you have some questions?"
(usual answer = no)
"OK could you not talk during the lecture please as other students need to learn this. Thank you".

Obviously easier if it's a small class / lecture theatre.

I feel for you, OP. Have had a similar situation teaching at university. What helped me was a colleague who pointed out that as female lecturers we have a responsibility to model good, strong woman, behaviour to our students - especially the young women. When we’re teaching, we’re showing our students how they ought to expect to be treated when they are in their workplaces one day. We don’t want to teach women to be intimidated (so we have to pretend we aren’t!). It really helped me assert myself when I could reframe it as defending someone else. Have always been so scared of confrontation in my own life! Good luck. You’re the boss!