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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for tips on how to make my husband interested in DIY

39 replies

sahknowme · 16/10/2018 15:05

My DH worked super hard over the past few years, and we've been lucky enough to be able to buy a house almost solely thanks to him. It's been his dream to own a house like this for a number of years, and he made it happen completely off his own back. I'm really appreciative of this and how hard he works for our little family.

When we moved in, I thought he would suddenly become super interested in actually keeping it nice, but no such luck. He has no interest in anything beyond occasional tidying and would rather either leave it or if it really annoys me, he'll pay someone to fix it.

I really wish he would put some effort into maintaining the house, but he comes home from work every day, cooks dinner (or chucks something in the oven), we put our DS to bed, and then he watches TV, catches up from work emails or surfs the Internet. On the weekends, other than family time, he would happily sit at home and do bugger all maybe cook a big meal (he loves food and cooking).

Now I know I could do some myself, but I'm not good at that sort of thing, and I know he is when he puts his mind to it. Plus I think he's really enjoy it once he started.

So AIBU to want to try to get him to like DIY? What do you like about it? And what would encourage you to like it?

OP posts:
Finfintytint · 16/10/2018 15:06

I think you should learn how to do it.

Ohheyyy · 16/10/2018 15:07

YABU.

Irony understand why he should be forced into it, if you can employ a tradesperson to do work round the house I would just do that. No one wants shoddy self done jobs.

Ohheyyy · 16/10/2018 15:07

I don't understand*

Onlyjoinedforthisthread · 16/10/2018 15:08

Do it together or do it yourself, with practice you'll improve.
Or you can continue to expect the world to revolve around you

BumDisease · 16/10/2018 15:08

Are you for real op?

Ohheyyy · 16/10/2018 15:08

I'm wondering if this is a reverse?

Annandale · 16/10/2018 15:09

Why the fuck should he?

AuntBeastie · 16/10/2018 15:09

If he liked it, he would do it! You can’t really make him like something he isn’t into.

If you’re interested in it you should keep trying - maybe you aren’t good at it yet, but you could be with practice. If you have the interest already, the skill will come with experience!

There are YouTube tutorials for everything to get you started, and you get great advice at shops like b&q or Homebase.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 16/10/2018 15:10

Imagine a man coming on here and saying 'I want to make my wife intersted in washing and ironing'?

You are being ridiculus op.

HellonHeels · 16/10/2018 15:10

well, I think you'd really enjoy it once you got started so why don't you do it?

He's not interested in DIY, get someone in to do what needs to be done. I can do DIY but I bloody hate it so I prefer to pay someone.

Thenewdoctor · 16/10/2018 15:10

Reverse. Has to be.

BitchQueen90 · 16/10/2018 15:13

Haha. YABVU. If you're that bothered then do it yourself.

Minniemountain · 16/10/2018 15:13

If you can afford to pay someone, why not?

DIY generally comes under "not fun, pay someone" in our house.

SillySallySingsSongs · 16/10/2018 15:14

Here's an idea.... You do it.

Minniemountain · 16/10/2018 15:15

Oh, and I do minor things myself as I like to and have time. DH can do it but would rather do other things with his limited spare time.

catlady3 · 16/10/2018 17:14

Both my DP and I work full time so I know what it's like to do a day's work, cook dinner and do chores, then trying to exercise and maybe have some hobbies and friends on top of that. Seriously, I wouldn't be up for DIY and my DP isn't either. If you can afford a handyperson, why not go for that?

mrcharlie · 16/10/2018 19:10

Get a 2nd rate extremely expensive tradesman in to do some work...shouldn't be too difficult find!!
The tradesman will undoubtedly cut every fucking corner whilst your back is turned and charge you a ridiculous amount too.

Any self respecting man would think "bugger that, I'll do it myself nextime"

Ohheyyy · 16/10/2018 19:25

mrcharlie Where do I even begin with how rude and presumptuous your post is???

EmperorTomatoRetchup · 16/10/2018 19:33

It's been his dream to own a house like this for a number of years, and he made it happen completely off his own back.

The expression is off his own bat not back, referring to runs scored by the batsman hitting the ball and are attributed to their personal tally as opposed to runs from byes or wides which are added to the teams 'extras' column.

But onto the main point, on the off chance this isn't a reverse, what are you doing whilst he is at work, cooking tea, and then working again in the evening? Perhaps he is a) too knackered or b) thinks you should do it?

Huggefire15 · 16/10/2018 20:03

What sort of DIY ? We can all probably supply you with tips. Depends if you have the right tools and preparation and time.

Bestseller · 16/10/2018 20:09

I think you need to do some courses OP.

umpteennamechanges · 16/10/2018 20:20

This is one of the most bonkers threads I've read on here for a while...

If you're that concerned why not learn DIY yourself?

It's like your husband posting on a forum to ask other men how he can make you interested in baking for him or greeting him at the door with a cocktail and the dinner in the oven Hmm

Totally nuts and makes you sound like a complete princess...and not in a good way.

Allthewaves · 16/10/2018 20:21

He pays someone to do it - what's your issue

PurpleDaisies · 16/10/2018 20:22

Everyone knows the you need a Y chromosome to be good at DIY. It’s just DI otherwise.

kaytee87 · 16/10/2018 20:23

Either do it yourself or pay for a tradesman. It sounds like he's pulling his weight in other ways. Would you like it if he posted asking how to get his wife interested in cooking as he'd like a meal ready for him getting in from work?