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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Things people you love do that drive you nuts

101 replies

CoughLaughFart · 13/10/2018 17:57

Just that really... a chance to get things off your chest. Things you’d never say to the person because a) you wouldn’t want to upset them and b) you know it’s irrational that it drives you so mad, but can’t help wanting to throw a television out of the window every time they do it.

My best friend has to ‘pop’ everywhere, regardless of location or distance. ‘Popping to the shops’? Fine. But no, she also ‘pops’ somewhere that’s a two-hour round trip. She ‘pops back’ to see her parents, who live 200 miles away. If she went to Azerbai-sodding-jan she’d ‘pop’ there 🤬

Another good friend has to ask at least seventeen different questions in a restaurant before she can order. Is there any kind of special offer? If there is, can she swap one of the other items on the menu for the ones on offer? How big is the portion? Would they recommend it? (Like any waitress is going to say ‘no, it tastes like licking a dog’s arse’.) Just order your sodding dinner and eat it!!!!

Aaaaaand breathe Grin

OP posts:
Camsie30 · 13/10/2018 20:06

Supports Brexit.... 😫

ConciseandNice · 13/10/2018 20:06

My husband never ever covers his mouth/nose when he sneezes or coughs. Even when I am sat 2 metres from him eating. It’s gross. I complain but to no avail.

He also only likes to have sex once every few months. I’m a nymphomaniac for wanting it more.

UbercornsGoggles · 13/10/2018 20:19

Cotton buds. Used. Everywhere.

LadyFidgetAndHerHandbag · 13/10/2018 20:24

Thank you BiscuitsAndGravy it's nice to know I'm not alone!

Fstar · 13/10/2018 20:29

Never taking my first answer and asking the same thing 5 times before i snap and say, no i have told you 5 times now, no.

Like oh wear my jacket to take the dog out. No its ok i have my owm. No take mine its warm. No thanks. No honestly take mine, you will love it. No ffs it your doesnt fit me anyway fucking accept my first answer!

lambdroid · 13/10/2018 20:35

My partner sings the alphabet with one letter twice, and skips a letter. The letter his own name begins with...

He sort of does it on purpose now, but it’s the hangover from a childhood mistake.

RubyWho · 13/10/2018 20:36

I have found my people.

DH:
-Coughs loudly and all the time. He’s not ill, there’s nothing wrong (seen a GP, been referred, etc), he’s just very congested;
-Snores

  • says “I’m afraid” after everything if it’s negative eg “We’ve run out of milk I’m afraid”.
-Says “oh dear”. This drives me to distraction with everyone, to be fair. -Falls asleep on the sofa downstairs, with lights blazing, until 4am (2-3x a week) -Leaves pants, socks etc in the bathroom -Brings rubbish from his lunch home with him in his bag, and then leaves it on the kitchen table instead of A- putting it in the bin or B-putting it in a bin on his way home? (I put said rubbish back in his backpack. It took a week for him to realise). -“I cleaned XYZ for you”. FOR ME? WE SHARE THIS HOUSE YOU FOOL.

DD and DS are gorgeous and perfect and never do anything wrong apart from starting almost every sentence with “erm yeah like” and saying “HUUUUH? I DIDN’T HEAR?” Instead of excuse me.

newyearwhoohoo · 13/10/2018 20:38

My DH shuffles around the house like a duck with haemorrhoids, not picking his feet up properly and is wearing out the carpet. Angry

Babybearsporij · 13/10/2018 20:44

DH waffles. On and on and on and on and on. Doesn't get to the point and there's no opportunities to interrupt.

Havalina · 13/10/2018 20:58

My ex did the falling asleep whenever sitting for more than 5 minutes
Eating apples in an enraging way
Putting frozen food in the fridge (not anything needing defrosting, think a whole weeks worth of frozen stuff)
Long drawn out boring stories
Saying brought instead of bought

Probably for the best he's an ex

girlgrower · 13/10/2018 20:59

DH watches stupid internet videos that his friends have sent him on his phone when we are watching tv of an evening. I HATE conflicting noise it makes me murderous.

He also faffs, and starts one job but then wanders off on a tangent into another before he's finished.

I am also concerned that he is turning into his father the older he gets....

My DM tells convoluted stories about people I don't know and tells me word for word what was said, like this (with this phrasing)

"He came in the office and was like 'Who sent that email'? I was like 'not me Geoff' and Sue was like 'It was me'. Well Geoff was furious and was like 'Next time speak to me first' " etc etc etc.

He was like, she was like, argh! Drives me INSANE!

loveulotslikejellytots · 13/10/2018 20:59

DH - while we sit having dinner, I'll ask a question. He will finish his current mouth full of food, shove another fork full in... then start answering my question. Why!!!???? Just answer me before you start eating again!

Also DH (I love him really) he has a cough at the moment. A really fucking irritating cough. But he won't take anything for it. Cough medicine doesn't actually work apparently.

FoofFighter · 13/10/2018 21:03

Anything that needs deciding from what to have for dinner or big purchases the answer I will get from DP is "its up to you"

AngryAngryAngry

Crackedvase · 13/10/2018 21:13

rubywho

Everything you said.

Plus- thigh rubbing. He wakes, swings his legs off the bed the sits and rubs his thighs vigorously for approx 20 seconds. It makes me so infuriated!
Also, cannot be without a drink, ever.

kitbabingley · 13/10/2018 21:18

DH is what I call a vocal meanderer. Uses a million words when several will suffice. Case in point - earlier on I asked him how the foil dispenser broke. "Well, last night, after you'd gone to bed, I was just going to the kitchen to make a drink. I decided to make one before sitting down with my game because I always forget and then end up needing a drink to take my tablet before I go to sleep, so I have to get up wake myself up. So I went to get a drink and I noticed the fridge was rattling. I was going to leave it but I thought there was no way I'd sleep through that so I investigated further. Opened the door, couldn't see anything going on there. Checked the freezer, nothing there either. I was SO confused, and then I realised the sticky velcro was coming off so the vibrations from the fridge were making the dispenser rattle. So I decided to put new velcro on, but as I was doing that, my hand slipped and the heel of it just caught the edge there and the plastic bracket broke. I need some superglue to fix it. I think there's some in the fourth drawer down in the drawers in the shed..."

I don't blame you if you passed out whilst trying to read all that, this happens on a DAILY basis! Why could he have not just said "I was trying to replace the velcro and broke it accidentally"?!

Ds1 can't communicate without shouting. No matter what mood he's in, always with the shouting.

My mum insists on talking AT LENGTH about TV programmes she knows I have no interest in.

Really I'm just quite intolerant...

Myusername101z · 13/10/2018 21:22

Dh asks my opinion even though he has already made up his mind eg

“What shirt should I wear”

“The red one”

“Oh but don’t you think the black one is nicer”

“No I think you should wear the red one”

“Are you sure , I think the red one is abit too bright”

“Oh just wear the F’ing black one then and don’t ask me next time”

Grin
BengalLioness · 13/10/2018 22:16

Ugh my DH has to lay in bed about 4 times a day to relax. He can't relax on the sofa or anything like that , he has to be in bed.

Another thing that annoys me is he's always on his phone non stop talking about Footy.

He spends an hour in the toilet whilst watching footy on his phone.

He drops water from the sink into the floor when he's doing the dishes- drives me in INSANE!

He always leaves the iron board out so it takes up all the space in our room!

He throws out bins but doesn't replace the bin bags!

Better stop here , I have such a long list and I'm sure he has one for me too lol

AmabelleOnabike · 13/10/2018 22:28

lexi727 have you watched "line of duty"? The boss policeman in that is northern Irish and calls everyone son. I loved the programme and him but it got soooooo irritating!

I find so many things that my nearest and dearest do irritating in the extreme that I will just sign myself off as Unreasonable without going into details. Like the first post responding to the OP though I am just perfect Grin

Shockers · 13/10/2018 22:32

DD says thank you in a really odd voice; very clipped and posh. It’s a kind of, ‘think yoo’.

I can’t believe I am irritated by my daughter being polite!

CaptainCarp · 13/10/2018 22:35

My partner leaves their nicotine patches everywhere! They look like dead skin or they end up stuck to my sock Angry

Also they snores & I have to poke them to they roll over & don't sound so much like a congested elephant.

Partners son has currently asking "why" to everything.. We are going to the shops "why" to get some food "why" so we can eat it "why" because we will be hungry "why" because we have to eat "why" because we get hungry "why"... I hope its just a phase as I run out of explanations lol

Heartofglass12345 · 13/10/2018 23:01

My mum talks about work or driving all the time
My sister interrupts you when you're talking if something pops into her head, even if it's nothing to do with what you're talking about at the time
My other sister needs to know what everyone else is having in a restaurant before she decides what she's having, even though she's a vegetarian 😂
My husband also cleans parts of things instead of the whole thing, and puts empty containers back in the fridge/ cupboards. He also puts the wrong clothes on our children, one is 2 and the other is 5 and he is always putting their clothes on each other!

bourbonbiccy · 13/10/2018 23:02

My beautiful DS (14Mnth) throwing his food on the floor off his high Chair closely followed by "gone" with his hands raised and a shocked face.

My DH snoring like a herd of rhino trampling through the room and insists on facing me or throwing his arm over me. Ggrrrrr

Flatasapancakenow · 13/10/2018 23:16

DH shaving and leaving little bits of stubble all over the sink.

CoughLaughFart · 13/10/2018 23:17

My other sister needs to know what everyone else is having in a restaurant before she decides what she's having

OMG I HATE this. My mom and a close friend both do it. Why does it matter what I’m having? You’ll be eating what YOU ordered!

OP posts:
Graphista · 13/10/2018 23:29

Dd - bloody nightmare for NOT ANSWERING HER PHONE. It's an all singing all dancing fairly new (but not absolute latest) yet she claims she doesn't hear it! Well then put a bloody ring tone on you DO hear😡

Dd - you'll all flame me for this one cos it's the opposite to those that dither - has EXACTLY the same meal (including certain alterations to the dishes) every time we go to X y Z restaurants or order in. I KNOW it doesn't affect me and there's no annoying dithering blah blah but I just think it must be SO boring for her - she says not that she just knows what she's like but it's like eating with a certain type of pensioner my bloody father who NEVER ventures to try anything new! I've even caught her out saying she doesn't like a thing when I KNOW she's never tried it! Where it does affect me slightly is when I'm cooking same dish for both of us (I'm veggie) I'm limited what I can make and I am starting to get bored making the same things all the time.

Empty packaging left in fridge/cupboard leading me to think we don't need more of whatever it is!

Mum - texts me, I text her back BUT if I text first - she PHONES back - no if I wanted to/had time to speak I'd have phoned! Why?!

THEN she does THIS:

"My mother will phone me, and then quite blatantly stop listening to whatever I am saying, while making mm-hmm, ok noises" so clearly she wasn't really in the mood for a chat either!

She also has this weird ability to answer questions asked 2/3 conversations previously in the middle of a new conversation that is COMPLETELY unrelated! Usually by this point the answer no longer even matters!!!

It's a bit like this in reverse:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BvmRI6K8TS8

She also is a frequent and persistent finger drummer which I find intensely irritating.

Also a professional bloody faffer! We have a small shopping area nearby most of the shops you'd need on one street, does she go up one side and down the other going in the shops she needs as she reaches them? No? She'll go right the other end first and get what she wants from the last shop, then goes back to beginning and goes in one of first shops, then to a shop in the middle... NO rhyme or reason to it whatsoever! Then bemoans how long it takes her!

Bro - farts about on computer/X box whatever while I'm on phone to him, gets distracted and then when he wins or something SHOUTS right in my ear! Or if he's telling one of his boys not to do yet another kamikaze stunt (his influence) it's me that gets screamed in my ear something like "STOP RIGHT THERE!!!! DO NOT TRY AND FLY OFF THE KITCHEN CABINET" or similar - just move the bloody phone away from your mouth first!

Re all the sniffers - have they been checked for sinus issues? I used to do this and it annoyed my ex, it was due to repeated sinus infections, but after a lot of trips to gp and eventually a referral to ent turned out I had a small blockage due to a previous infection that had never properly cleared. Once it was removed no more sniffing. Could also be allergies. I have hayfever too which starts with feeling blocked and as if sniffing will help (it doesn't) dd usually gets to almost strangling me then says to me I need to start taking my allergy meds.

"Cough medicine doesn't actually work apparently." Cough medicine is pretty limited in its effectiveness to be honest. You need to address the cause. If not cold/infection related could be a nasal drip/allergies again.

Following other pps who similarly digressed -

The Ex!

Sniffer - not of the kind I meant earlier where there might be an explainable cause but real hoiking, vomit inducing, collecting phlegm to spit out! 😷

Ate ridiculously fast, pure inhaled his food!! He said it was due to being army and if you didn't eat fast enough somebody would Nick it - BUT my dad and other relatives also army backgrounds and they DON'T do this. He also never used a knife unless there was something like a chop he had to cut up, then he'd cut it all up at beginning of meal and then just use the fork.

Also ate and talked with mouth open, food literally falling out! 😷bleurgh!

"Crack" joints constantly followed by a loud "ahh that's better"

Contrary to the "half job" thing if he did a job he'd go all out so eg if he mopped the kitchen floor he'd pull everything out and mop under etc BUT he'd expect a fucking medal for it because he only did it once in a blue bloody moon and he'd take the attitude as if why couldn't I do a better job when I did it - that would be because I've a million other bloody things to do!!! I haven't time to spend 2.5 hours mopping the kitchen floor! Although he did also used to do the dishes WITHOUT first collecting up HIS numerous half cuppas from about the house so I'd end up tidying them away before bed and washing them with the breakfast dishes - I started off washing them late at night but then thought stuff that he's supposed to have washed them!

Not emptying gym kit promptly from gym bag leaving the sweary festering mess until he deigned to put it in the laundry basket the day before he needed it again - which also pissed me off as I'd sometimes stupidly think I'd caught up on the laundry only to have to put a load on just so his bloody kit was dry in time! Also throwing clothes so they landed NEAR the laundry basket rather than actually getting off arse and PUTTING THEM IN Laundry basket - this phase didn't last long as I stopped washing things that weren't actually IN the basket.

Staying up stupid late playing bloody computer games then being murder for getting up in mornings cos he was knackered - well d'uh!!

Wanting to sleep with Windows wide open in bedroom even in depths of winter when it was bloody freezing! And then hogging the duvet!

It's amazing I stayed as long as I did to be honest!

I know I'm not perfect either. Dd tells me she's wrong I am perfect

Captain is his son 5-9 years old? If so more than likely a phase. Lots of kids do it around this age ime.