Ten years olds with iphones?

[AjasLipstick]

DD is 10 and has an old phone of MIL's to use for games etc. She also has a tablet.

She's a young ten in many ways and is in no way ready for social media. Most of her school friends are the same.

But she has two friends who are very good mates of hers who don't go to her school and who both have iphones. These kids do a lot of live chat on their phones and DD is DESPERATE fore one.

I feel irritated that their parents have allowed this and anyway I can't afford to buy DD an iphone.

Am I wrong to keep saying no? Her sister got an iphone at 12 and it was second hand....a hand me down.

If you can't afford it, you're obviously not wrong to say no. Your dd needs to learn that she won't always get what she wants. That's just life, I'm afraid.

We bought a second hand iphone 4 for dd when she was 11. Her friends mostly had newer models but she accepted that we weren't going to get her a newer one and saved up her birthday/christmas money etc to trade it in for a newer model eventually (also second hand).

There is no point in getting irritated with other parents for what they have given their dc. We all have different budgets and priorities. What kids want is not the same as what they need, so make your own position clear and tell her that she will need to start saving up for something if she wants it.

Oh, and the same goes for social media. I didn't let dd get Snapchat or Instagram in Year 7, because I felt she was too young. Other parents made different decisions, which was their choice. DD had to try and understand that I had my reasons and that she needed to respect those. In return, I tried to keep an open mind and I reviewed my decision from time to time to ensure that my reasoning was valid.

My 9yo has an iPhone. (There should be a head in bag smiley)

We had a hand-me-down available and it was cheaper to give her that and add her to our plan than it was to buy her a cheap pay as you go phone.

We needed her to have a phone occasionally.

We don’t let her chat though. Actually the thing is pretty well locked down. She has phone numbers for a very small list of family and even free apps require parental approval to install.

I wouldn't actually mind DD having little video chats in a way but I worry that these things open kids up for bullying and being left out etc.

At 10, she's pretty clued up socially but it's too young isn't it? I'm confused really.

DD1 is 14 and she didn't really do shared chatting till last year at 13. DD2 would be talking all bloody day....she's a full on kid too.

My 10yo has an iPhone. All her closest friends seem to also have one. We’ve had no problems with her use of it (so far).

My (nearly 11) DD has an old one, although I've only recently allowed her to have a SIM card in it. Mainly it was so she can get used to using it and managing credit in the months before starting secondary school, when she'll need to be getting buses on her own.

She does use messenger to chat with certain friends that I know very well, but I also go through her phone regularly to keep an eye on what's being said.

My 12yo has one and has had for a few years.

But it's only this year that she has a fully functional SIM as she is out and about a lot (I love the "find my iPhone" feature 😉)

I don't allow Instagram or Facebook etc although a lot of her friends have it.

She has always had hand me down iPhones from her gran and me.

You are perfectly within your rights and normality to wait! Usually they get them when they go to secondary

And yes, I check her phone messages regularly. She knows that is a condition of having the phone.